We sat on the cafe’s couch together, not much farther apart than we sat on our own couch at home. When I found myself desperate to close the last few inches between us, I put my book down. “Wanna head back to the apartment to read some more?”
Jax closed her book and squeezed my knee. “Whatever you want, I want.”
Neither of us said much on the drive home, but it was a comfortable silence. Once we were back inside our apartment, we wordlessly settled onto the couch and started reading again. After about an hour of reading, I found myself getting tired, so I laid my head on Jax’s shoulder. “Don’t mind me,” I said, before letting out a long yawn.
“I never mind.” Jax closed her book and laid her head on mine.
I sighed contentedly as I fell asleep. This is what safety felt like. This is whathomefelt like.
When I opened my eyes again, it was completely dark outside. I fumbled around for my phone, and when I found it, I realized we had been asleep for almost two hours. When I had removed my head from Jax’s shoulder, hers had naturally fallen onto my shoulder without even waking her up. I watched her sleep and listened to her almost inaudible little snores. I could have stayed like this forever, watching every little twitch of her nose and each small smile, but she soon woke up.
“What time is it?” she said through a yawn.
My stomach growled before I could answer her question, causing us both to laugh. “Clearly, it’s dinner time.”
“So, what are we ordering?” Jax asked. When I gave her a pointed look, she shook her head. “Absolutely not. Cooking is productive.”
I rolled my eyes at her. She was getting carried away with everything she foundproductive.Soon, she was probably going to say we couldn’t get up to go to the bathroom because emptying our bladders was too productive. “In that case, let’s do pizza. We can eat it right out of the box. That way, we’re not being too productive by grabbing plates.”
“See!” Jax slapped the couch excitedly. “Now you’re getting it.”
The rest of the night was filled with snuggles, pizza, and more movies, and I had to admit, I might be able to get used to not being productive every once in a while.
When it was time for bed, I hesitated because I wasn’t sure what to do. Most nights Jax and I fell asleep together, but that was because we had sex first. At this point, I didn’t know how I would fall asleep if I wasn’t wrapped in her arms, but I wasn’t sure if it was okay to ask to sleep together when we weren’tsleeping together.
“Your room or mine?” Jax asked when she walked out of the bathroom after doing her nighttime routine.
Okay. Apparently, she doesn’t have the same reservations as me. Good to know.“Let’s do my room. Yours was the last place we had sex. I’m afraid that will tempt me.”
Jax raised an eyebrow at me and smirked. “Is this your way of admitting that you find me irresistible?”
I walked over to Jax and playfully smacked her shoulder. “Just shut up and snuggle me.”
“As you wish.”
After I did my nighttime routine, I went into my bedroom, where Jax was already snuggled under the covers with Speck lying at her feet. Jax looked at Speck, then at me. “I figured it was fine to let him sleep in here tonight, since there’s no funny business going on anyway.”
I smiled at Speck, who looked so content lying in my bed. “We should plan out more nights like this, so he doesn’t always end up being forced to sleep on the couch.”
“If you didn’t tire me out so badly every time, I could go get him once our fun was done, but you make it so I can’t even move.”
Now, I was the one who couldn’t move. If I did, the electrical current running through my body from thinking about all of the ways I could make Jax too stiff to move, might become too hard to contain. “You can’t talk to me like that. Not until tomorrow night.Please.”
“Fine. A republican is president.”
“Yep. Moment ruined. Good job.”
When I got underneath the covers, I suddenly wasn’t tired, which I guess wasn’t too hard to believe since I’d barely done anything all day.
Jax must have felt the same way, because instead of cuddling close to me, she rolled onto her side to face me. “Are you tired?”
I rolled onto my side as well. “Not really.”
“Me either.” Jax reached out and took my hand in hers. She ran her thumb along the back of my hand as she stared down at our interlocked fingers. “How many kids do you want?”
This was a very intimate question for two people lying in bed together holding hands, but Jax made it sound more like a passing remark than a question into our currently non-existent future. “I’d honestly be happy with just one. I love my siblings so much, so I hate to keep my child from having that relationship, but I really like the idea of a small, tight-knit family.” I tried to prepare myself so I could keep my voice level to ask her my question, but it was hard when there was so much more to our relationship than either of us were acknowledging. “What about you? Do you want kids?”
Jax nodded. “One or two would be good. I definitely wouldn’t want more than that. I can’t imagine being outnumbered by my kids. I liked what you said about a small, tight-knit family. It reminds me of my family. There were a few times when I was really young that I thought I wanted a sibling, but I really liked being the only child. I felt like I got a piece of my parents that other people don’t get, because I wasn’t sharing them with anyone else. I don’t know if that actually makes any sense.”
