“I noticed.”
In the daylight, Cathrynne saw that her mother had aged. Besides the thick swathes of gray in her hair, the skin of her face looked thin and finely creased like crêpe paper. She wore a quilted jacket with colorful embroidery in panels down the front over a long white skirt and scuffed boots. A traditional Rus style that was very different from the modern, tailored woman Cathrynne remembered.
Now Hysto looked at her like a kicked dog. “I’m so sorry, Cathrynne.”
Perhaps it was awful, but she felt a wave of disgust. “Don’t be.”
“Why not? Everything that’s happened to you is my fault.”
“I’m not some pathetic creature,” Cathrynne said coldly. “I have a life. One I happen to like a good deal. So I’d appreciate it if you didn’t make assumptions.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry?—”
“You can stop saying that, too. It’s been twenty years. I’ve done fine without you. So please, save the apologies.” She had no idea where this cruelty was coming from, only that she hated her mother at the moment.
Hysto glanced at the door as if she might leave but didn’t.
“I want you to know that we did not simply go on as if nothing had happened.” Her hands kneaded each other. “After they took you away, I sank into a period of deep melancholy. You don’t know what it is to lose a child.”
“No,” she replied evenly, “but I know what it is to lose everything else.”
“May I sit?”
Cathrynne didn’t want to do this, but she nodded. Hysto sank into a chair.
“We founded a school,” she said. “For young women in need. Girls who might otherwise end up on the streets.”
“That’s admirable.”
“I needed to help someone. It was the only thing that . . . I just needed to.” She stared at Cathrynne for an uncomfortable moment, her expression haunted.
“What?”
“It’s just . . . you look so much like your father.”
She already knew that. She certainly didn’t look like her mother and half-sister. “What happened to him?”
“I don’t know.” Hysto dabbed her eyes with a sleeve. “He fled when the White Foxes came. Alluin was arrested and I never saw him again.” Bitterness tinged her voice. “Mount Meru disciplines its own. I sent a plea for any information to the Angel Tower, but no one would tell me.” She looked out the window. “I was ostracized for a time, but the Lenormand name still carries weight and I have friends on the Council. Eventually, the scandal blew over.”
“Well, I’m glad for you,” Cathrynne said, her tone still cool. “I’d hate for you to be punished for the rest of your life. That would be unfair, wouldn’t it?”
Hysto went pale. Before she could respond, the door swung open and Nestania entered. “I have word of Lord Morningstar,” she said.
Cathrynne’s pulse leapt. “Has he recovered from his illness?”
“Fully.”
She couldn’t keep the smile from her face. “I would like to see him.”
Nestania looked regretful. “I’m afraid that’s impossible.”
“Why?”
“He has returned to Kirith.”
Cathrynne frowned. “He’s gone home?”
Her grandmother’s eyes were pitying. “Did you expect any different? His reputation for coldness is well-earned.”
