Me and God.
And somehow, that feels like enough for tonight.
I reach for my phone again, not to check for missed calls or scroll aimlessly, but to open the notes app. My fingers hover over the screen for a second, then I type slowly, deliberately.
Things I’m learning:
Faith doesn’t have to look perfect.
Grace is free. I don’t have to earn it.
It’s okay to take a step back so I can take a step forward.
I stare at the words for a moment, then lock the screen and set the phone aside.
There’s still a conversation waiting for me.
With Gray.
And I know it won’t be easy. I know I’ll probably cry,and he might look at me like I’m breaking something beautiful—but I’m not doing it to break us.
I’m doing it to make room for something deeper. Something real.
I’m choosing to believe that if this love between us is rooted in something holy, it will hold. Even if I have to loosen my grip for a while.
Even if it hurts.
I press my forehead to my knees, whisper one last prayer into the quiet.
“Give me the strength to follow You. Even if it means letting go.”
Chapter 33
Gray
I wake up with the taste of regret heavy on my tongue. My eyes blink open to the muted light filtering through the blinds, and I roll over, squinting at the clock. 7:12 a.m.
It feels like I barely slept.
The memories of yesterday replay on a loop—my harsh tone, the clipped words I threw at Ivy backstage. Her face, startled and unsure, flickers across my mind like a bad dream. I run my hands over my face, groaning as I sit up and plant my feet on the cold hardwood floor.
I haven’t been that guy in years. The one who lashes out without thinking. The one whose words cut before he can reel them back.
I reach for my phone on the nightstand, flipping it over. My thumb hovers over the screen, and I tap it awake.
Nothing.
