Prologue
If you would’ve told me two years ago that my stepbrothers would be my undoing, or that I would be theirs, I would’ve called you a liar.
-Presley Kate James
Theodora James,my mother, collects husbands like most people change their underwear. Her latest divorce, which was just made final two weeks ago, had taken over the last year of our lives.
Unlike her previous marriages, she wasn't the only one that was grieving because of the separation this time.
Like a knife to my gut, she'd pushed my stepdad away even though I'd begged her not to. Selfishly, I wanted them to stay together, but he deserves so much better than my mother.
Since the beginning of their relationship, Richard and I have had a special bond. Although he'd only been around for six years, Iknew without a shadow of a doubt that I could trust him. He was for all intents and purposes, my dad.
He's the best man that I've ever met, and for the first time in my life, I’ve been able to count on someone that wasn't me.
She isn't a terrible person by any means. She's good when she's good. However, when things don't go precisely in the way that she thinks they should, she is rotten to her core.
Her need to be the center of everyone's universe is at the heart of all of her problems. She needs the limelight like the farmers need the rain.
I blame most of her shortcomings on her being a former Hollywood elite. She quit acting when she met my business tycoon of a father. They wed, and she gave up her big city dreams to live in a small town in South Georgia. Their wedded bliss only lasted two whole years. Yet, after I was born shit hit the proverbial fan.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm really her kid, the only similarity between us is our honey-brown hair. She's model thin with a kickass body. While I'm curvy, like brick house thick. Her hazel eyes sparkle when she laughs, where mine are just plain old green.
While I'm not the ugliest girl at the party, no one would ever mistake me for being a beauty queen either. My mother, on the other hand, is so beautiful it almost hurts to look at her.
This last divorce has shaken her confidence up a bit, she truly loved Richard, but sadly, she loved herself more.
Instead of him begging her to let him stay when she asked him to leave, he left. I was at school, but I wouldn't be surprised if he'd already had a couple of bags packed beforehand.
He begged me to forgive him for running away, I could never in a million years fault him for putting up with her bullshitthough. My mom can be a little cray-cray when the mood hits her just right.
Thinking of Richard makes my heart sad. Even though we talk every day, I miss him. He's happily dating a woman that is okay with our relationship. I'd like to think that he wouldn't be with her if she wasn’t, but in all reality I'm not his real kid. Sometimes, I worry he's going to forget about me.
On the pretense that my mom needed to find herself after such a heart-wrenching breakup, she'd pleaded with my bio dad to let me stay with him and his new family for the entirety of June.
God forbid, either of them let me, the most responsible teenager you will ever meet, stay by herself. She was leaving to go on a month-long sabbatical to the French Polynesian islands, and apparently, I couldn't be trusted.
Don't get me wrong I love my dad, and my half-sister and brother, it's just that I prefer to be alone. In both households, I could be set on fire and I'd still be nonexistent.
I'm a wallflower. Pushed into the shadows, only to be taken out when someone needs something from me. My mom needs my level headedness and the comfort I give her. My dad needs a near perfect daughter.
He's running for state senate, and my half-sister is wild but beautiful. She is the one he shows off, I'm the one he brags to his colleagues about.
My parents are exhausting, and I'm counting down the days until my first day of college. Last week, I got my acceptance letter for Pixie Hollow University. Which is the most prestigious Ivy League in the South. I'll be staying on campus, but it's only a two hour drive from home, if my mom needs me.
Guilt thick and raw begins to work its way in. If I'm not careful my acid reflux will be at an all time hightonight.
As much shit as I talk about my Mom, it's going to be hard leaving her. It's not so far fetched to think that she won't be able to survive without me.
Who's going to take her wine glass away when she's had too much? Who will hold her in their arms when she's lying on the bathroom floor sobbing and screaming after another breakup?
There does appear to be a silver lining this time though. Every conversation I've had with her since she's been at the retreat has been promising.
For the first time in my life, I have a glimmer of hope that she'll be okay. Even as early as yesterday, she sounded like a brand new woman.
Mr. Doug Donovan, the head psychiatrist for the retreat has allowed me to be a part of some of her sessions via FaceTime. Before him, she would have never admitted to any wrongdoing where I'm concerned. I cried myself to sleep the night she apologized for always putting me on the back burner.
On the day after my 18th birthday, I was finally allowed to come home from my dad's. She'd promised me a party with just us two.
