"My place then," I said. "Unless you'd prefer to mope around here all night?"
"I should help Zara." Connor swallowed down the rest of his beer in a gulp and slid off his stool.
"I'll give you a hand." I finished my beer and followed him behind the bar.
I placed our glasses in the glass washer and caught the washcloth he tossed me to get to start on wiping the tables. He made it his job to tidy up the liquor bottles and take the empties out to the recycling.
Between the three of us, we got the place packed up quickly. He turned the lights down and followed us out, locking the doors behind us.
"See you tomorrow," Zara said cheerfully before heading to her small apartment above the souvenir store across the street.
"Night." We stood and watched until she disappeared into the building to be sure she got there safely. The distance was short but Connor wouldn't be doing his job if the staff weren't safe, especially a woman. No one was hurting any of his father's employees on his watch. Or mine.
Don't read anything into it, we’re still assholes.
"Remember the time we went into the city to watch hockey?" I tilted my face back to look up at the expanse of sky above us. "We couldn't see any of the stars. They look so fucking big from here. Like you could reach out and grab one."
"They're not big, we're up high," Connor said gruffly. "And you can't grab them, the fuckers are made of… I dunno, whatever the sun is made of." He shrugged.
"Fuck." I gave him a look. "Be romantic, why don't you?" I dug my elbow into his side.
"Sorry if I gave you the impression I was romantic," he said sarcastically.
But he took in a breath of clean air and stared up at the stars. "I guess they're kinda cool."
On a night like this, I could make out hundreds, thousands of them winking at us. If I remembered anything about constellations from high school, I could tell you which ones I saw, but I didn't. I preferred to make up my own patterns anyway. Like that one there? It looked like a dildo.
"I'd call running a bath for someone and buying them food romantic," I said after a few moments.
"Don't," he said. "It's not. It wasn't about that. It's…what we do. That's all. I've taken food to Whitney too, when she's sick. And Fiona. And Carly." The woman who worked in the café was old enough to be our mother. “What I did was a gesture of habit, not kindness.”
"Yeah, but I don't remember you stomping around with that angry bear face after helping them," I said. "And I don'tremember you saying you saw them naked. Or wanting to. It's okay to admit when you're attracted to someone, you know?"
We started to walk down Main Street away from the Frosty Brew, past stores closed hours ago.
"It's just physical," he said. "I want to fuck her. That's all it is."
"I never said it was more," I said, not bothering to contain my amusement. "I want to fuck her too. Why not? We're not related to her. We didn't grow up with her. She's a new pussy to play with."
"Yeah, we didn't see her eat crayons." He told me about Whitney saying that and smirked.
I laughed. Whitney was right though. Knowing everyone in town had its downside. Too many things couldn't be forgotten or unseen by them or me. I'd done some dumb shit in my day. I didn't need to be with someone who'd remind me of those things at the worst possible moment.
One of the good things about Connor was that he'd done those things with me. Instead of laughing at me, we reminisced. Laughed at each other. Wondered how the hell we both made it to adulthood. Like the time we thought it was a good idea to ride lawn chairs down the white water. We survived, the chairs didn't. Much to the irritation of Connor's mother. Sometimes I think she would have preferred the chairs make it, not us. The chairs were a lot less trouble.
"Everyone in town feels like a sister to me,” I said. “Everyone except Leah. I don't know about you, but I don't want to fuck my sister. Yours on the other hand…"
He glared at me. "Stay away from my sister." As if he needed to warn me.
Even if I wanted to, Whitney wouldn't have gone there. For so many reasons. Including the fact she wouldn't be interestedin fucking someone her brother was also fucking. That would be weird.
"I prefer her brother," I said, my voice low.
"Good answer." Connor seemed appeased by that.
"I thought so." I grinned.
My hand brushed past his. I wanted to grab it, lace my fingers in his. Even out on an almost empty road, I didn't.
