He reached for her suddenly, and with the memory of her mother’s last spanking fresh in her mind, she shoved her chair backwards out of his reach.
“Madelaine.” He dropped his hand and sat very still. “Goddamn,” he whispered. “Did your father beat you as a child?”
“No.” She was very glad he’d not asked about her mother. She’d never told a soul about the spankings she’d received from her mother every time she’d been a disappointment, but now that she was remembering them, she was shocked to realize just how many she could recall, and the pain of what her mother called “a simple spanking”.
He studied her intently for a moment before speaking. “Who beat you?”
Heat flooded her cheeks, and she swallowed convulsively against the feeling that her tongue was tied. “N-n-no one.”
His eyes glittered as he stared. “Madelaine, you’re lying to me.” His voice was low and fierce. “Tell me. I’ll keep your secret.”
His scent of freshly washed male surrounded her. When had he moved his chair closer? Their arms touched and their legs brushed. She glanced worriedly at Louisa, but the woman’s eyes were closed and her mouth was hanging open. Wonderful, her chaperone, her lone defense against her own desire for Grey, was fast asleep. Discomfited, she pressed her fingers to her temple and took a deep, calming breath. “My mother didn’t beat me,” she said without stuttering, so it had to be true. “She s-sp—” She clenched her teeth and took another deep breath. “She spanked me when I deserved it, which was quite a lot given how disobedient I was.”
He slid his arm around the back of her chair to rest on her shoulders, while he smoothed her hair in a repeated, calming fashion with his free hand. “What sort of spankings?”
She sighed at the relaxing feeling his touch brought her. Closing her eyes, she leaned her head against his arm. “The typical sort with her hand and sometimes a leather strap.”
“And did it hurt very much?”
“I don’t know.” But her bottom screamed now in remembrance.
“Madelaine.”
She opened her eyes and looked at him. His face was inches from hers. She tried to draw back, but he slid his hand to the base of her skull and held her locked in place. “Did it hurt?”
He’d not relent until he had his answer. She could see it in the dark glint of his stormy gaze. “Yes, it hurt. Terribly. I usually couldn’t sit the next day. Are you satisfied?”
She tried to turn her face from his, but his other hand came up and captured her chin. “No, I’m angry as hell. Did your father hit you too? Because if he did—”
“No,” she said as sharply as she dared with two people sleeping so near. “As far as I know, he never had an inkling Mother hit me. He was gone often to see the king and on various trips, and when he came home Mother would always be upset with him for having been gone as long as he was. I think they were too busy arguing over how much he was gone to talk much about me other than for Mother to bemoan what a failure I was as a proper lady.”
Grey looked at her as if he was struggling with some great emotion. He stroked her bottom lip with his finger, igniting that familiar fire he’d lit before deep in her belly. “I’ll never hurt you, or let anyone else hurt you again.”
The shock of his lips on hers silenced anything she was about to say and allowed him complete access to her mouth. His tongue slipped inside like silk, but burning hot. He explored her mouth gently with erotic strokes until the fire in her belly started to spread up her body, and a low moan escaped her. Then just as suddenly as he’d started the kiss, he pulled away but captured her hand as he did so and brought it to his face. “I wish we were alone.” His voice was raw and gravelly.
She traced down the slope of his jawline, and then made herself pull away. “I wish it too, but I know it’s very good we are not.”
“Why’s that?” His hand was again around her shoulder, his fingers brushing lightly back and forth over the skin exposed at the base of her neck.
“Because you scare me.”
“I scare you?” He stopped brushing her lip.
“No, no.” She shook her head. “The way you make me feel when I’m around you scares me.”
“Ah.” He smiled, two dimples appearing in either side of his cheeks. “That’s different. That kind of fear I like. You should release yourself to your fears. A little bit, that is.”
God, the man was impossible. His every word sounded like an invitation to sin, and she very much wanted to respond “yes”, but she couldn’t. Yet she could offer him the truth of her heart. “I’ve avoided you since you told me what my father said because I was afraid if I was alone with you too much, I would break my vow to be an obedient daughter.”
“I see.” He fiddled with one of the flowers embroidered on her dress. “So you do want me to continue to court you?”
“Very much,” she whispered, suddenly feeling shy.
A crease lined his forehead. “And if your father won’t relent and give his permission?”
She refused to consider the possibility. “He won’t refuse me. He’s very reasonable, and I’m sure his worry has to do with your reputation at Court. But once he hears how honorable you really are, and I tell him how you cared for your sister, I know he’ll change his mind.”
“What if your father is refusing my courtship because of other reasons?”
