“Then I’ll be sure,” he growled, “to be really wicked.” With that delicious promise, he led her to the priest.
Father Michael gave them both a slightly chastising, slightly amused look and then said, “Hold yer hands out toward each other.” They did as they were bade, and as the priest started to wrap the binds around their hands, Reikart caught her gaze and held it, a sensuous look passing between them. He turned to her, said the vows, and then it was her turn to repeat them to Reikart. “Ye are blood of my blood and bone of my bone. I give ye my body, that we two might be one. I give ye my spirit, ’til our life shall be done.”
Reikart’s gaze was riveted on her face, making her feel special and cherished with the way he almost seemed to be memorizing what she looked like, but she knew that had to be wishful thinking. Yet, when it was his turn to talk and he spoke his vows, his words reverberated with intensity as he came to the last verse, as if he truly meant them. “Now you will feel no rain, for I’ll protect you. Now you’ll feel no pain, for I shall be your shield. Now our lives are no longer two but one.”
Her body ached for him by the time he was done speaking. So when Father Michael encouraged Reikart to kiss her to seal the marriage and his mouth covered hers hungrily, explosive currents surged through her. She thought such intense attraction must be perilous to her heart.
“Ye are staring at yer wife,” Reikart’s mom whispered in his ear.
Reikart tore his focus away from Deirdre, who was laughing as she danced in a circle with her sister, his aunt, and six other women in the middle of the great hall. Everyone had eaten, and the benches and tables had been pushed to the walls to make room for dancing. It was tradition in Deirdre’s clan for the first dance to be just the bride, the council wives, and the wife of the laird. Reikart had been slightly worried that the women might be reluctant to dance with Deirdre, given what they’d labeled her, but his mother had assured him that the simple act of his marrying her would have wiped away much of the perceived stain on her character. He was relieved to see she’d been right.
His mom studied him for a long moment. “What are yer plans?”
“My plans?” he asked, picking up his goblet and taking a long swig of wine. He appreciated the way the wine instantly eased his tension; he sure had a lot of it.
Married.He was married. For a man who never intended to get close to a woman again, this presented a problem. But he felt fairly confident he’d worked out a solution.
“Yer plans on how ye intend to go about with yer new wife,” his mom explained, her tone amused.
He was glad that only he and his mom remained on the dais. He didn’t want to have this conversation in front of anyone else, and Mom had always been impossible to deter once she got something in her head that she wanted to do, talk about, or achieve. Clearly, that aspect of her personality had not changed. She was like a dog going after a bone.
“My plan,” he said slowly, pausing to finish his wine, “is to treat her with respect and kindness. She understands what I can give her. We discussed it before we were married.” Damn, it felt weird to call himself married, but he was acutely, impossibly aware that it did not feelbad.
“What precisely did ye tell her ye could give her?”
If it had been anyone other than his mom asking, he would tell them to mind their own damn business, but he couldn’t say that to the woman who had not only brought him into this world but had cared for him all his life. He scrubbed a hand over his face, certain she wouldn’t agree with what he’d told Deirdre. “Basically, I said I could offer her protection, loyalty, family, and, er, desire.”
His mom nodded. “Those are good starts, but they won’t keep a woman like her or a man like you content, and once the discontent rises it will destroy yer marriage.”
“I’ll be content,” he shot back, suddenly irritated.
“Fine,” Mom said. “Let’s say you will since ye force yerself to be because of your guilt.” Leave it to his mom to know exactly what was in his head without him telling her. He refused to acknowledge she had called a spade a spade, though, so he simply stared at her. She gave him a knowing look. “She will not be content. She will fall in love with ye, and then she will want your love—” He opened his mouth to disagree, but when his mom held up a staying hand, he shut it. “And when ye don’t give her your love, she will be devastated, and then she will want to protect herself by pulling away from ye.”
“I’m glad you think I’m so loveable,” he teased.
Mom smacked him on the arm. “Remember what I said when it starts to happen, Reikart. Ye will lose her eventually if ye don’t let go of your guilt, and I’d hate to see that. Right now, ye are going through the motions of life. With her, ye will be living life again.”
“Reikart!” Deirdre suddenly called from the dance floor.
He looked to her, and happiness slammed him in the chest and took his breath. Her blond hair tumbled wildly about her shoulders. Her cheeks were rosy from her dancing, she had her skirt fisted in both hands, and she was twisting her hips side to side as she kicked her feet in front of her. “Come dance with me!”
He was pushing back from his seat when his mom grabbed him by the hand. He looked down at her. “Ye can’t run from love, Son. It will find ye.”
He nodded, his mom’s words staying with him as he made his way onto the dance floor and took Deirdre’s hands. When she grinned at him, his chest constricted. He could fall for her. He knew it as he twirled her around and her rich laughter surrounded him, as she instructed him on the proper way to dance in her time, as she cooed at the children in the great hall and offered smiles to everyone, even those who still looked at her with disdain. He could fall for her if he let himself, but he could not let himself. Yet, he had to do all he could to make sure not to hurt her. He never wanted to do that.
Much later in the night, Deirdre wrapped her arms around her waist as Reikart closed the bedchamber door, shutting out some of the noise from the passage where many of her clansfolk were crowded, waiting for proof of her innocence. She was suddenly nervous for what was to come, and knowing there were people standing outside the door made matters all the worse.
Reikart turned toward her and leaned against the door, a crease between his brows. Part of her wanted to go to him, but part of her wanted him to come to her. The wedding feast had been great fun, but it had seemed to her that every time Reikart appeared to be truly enjoying himself, he would quickly become distant. She suspected it had everything to do with his guilt over Amanda, and though he had told her what he could give and she had agreed, knowing it and seeing it playing out in reality were very different. She wanted to get close to him, so perhaps if she gave him distance he would eventually want to return.
He pushed off the door and closed the space between them, stopping in front of her. His nearness made her heartbeat double. Looking down at her, he said, “I don’t like this.”
Her heart plummeted to her feet. “Marriage?”
“No, no,” he quickly said and tugged her into the circle of his arms. “The tradition of people waiting outside of our bedroom for proof of your innocence.”
She inhaled a long deep breath. She didn’t like it, either, but the talk she’d had with Shona before she had wed Reikart was very vivid in her memory. Her gut told her not to mention the talk and to go through with the ritual as Shona had encouraged. She didn’t know what her mother-in-law was thinking, but she trusted her in this. Deirdre forced a shrug. “’Tis a ritual that must be performed if the mark against my character is to be removed.”
“I want that for you,” Reikart said, his hands slipping up her arms to bring her even closer. “Because you want it, I will give it to you, but I don’t like it. You shouldn’t have to prove anything to them. I can tell you this, double standards remain in the future, too. Women are still judged more harshly than men for having a healthy sexual appetite, but it’s not nearly as harsh and restrictive as it is now.”
