‘Nate’s right, you know. We can’t go on like this indefinitely and now we’re getting back to normal it’s time to think about where we go from here, with Willow. Last night was dreadful and it’s clear she needs professional help around the clock.’
The coffee dried on Robin’s lips as another wave of anger surged. ‘Ah, so you’ve taken to eavesdropping. Typical.’
‘I overheard as I came out of my study, and anyway, nothing he said surprised me because we’ve already discussed it at length, prior to last night’s events. As I said. I agree with Nate and whether you like it or not, he’s her next of kin, her husband and if push comes to shove, his wishes will take precedence over yours.’
With that, Edmund sat back in his chair and sipped his tea, eyeing Robin like she was prey, a hint of a smile on his lips.
His words had wounded Robin; how could they not? He and Nate were conspiring and that scared her.
I hate you so much.That was all she could muster, a thought so pure and true that each word stuck in her head, swam in front of her eyes, poisoned her blood. And still he continued.
‘The thing is, Robin, this isn’t about you, and your indomitable belief that you alone can care for Willow. It’s about this family and whether you like it or not the situation is taking over all our lives and Nate for one, deserves a chance to live his, even if you’ve given up on yours.’ His eyes fixed Robin to the spot while he waited, seemingly satisfied thus far with his analysis.
The word, when it burst from her lips came unbidden and possibly as an antidote to the fear that was infecting her heart.
‘FAMILY!’ She laughed out loud, then, and shook her head. ‘What do you care about family when you’ve destroyed ours? You shamed Cris, then pushed him away once you knew you couldn’t control him and as for Willow, she’s been your pet project since she was a child, moulding her in an image you found suitable until once again, someone dared to go their own way.’
Her body visibly trembled as she spat her hate across the table.
‘That was the cruellest thing you ever did, Edmund, using her love ofyou, her faith and loyalty and… and purity of soul against her. Taking away her dream of becoming a priest, a vocation that would’ve brought her great joy and maybe saved her from all of this…’ She waved her hands around the room to signify where they were, their situation, and then she pointed directly at him. ‘And saved her from YOU.’
Anger consumed Robin. Edmund merely rolled his eyes and then stood, made his way in silence to the worktop and began removing slices of bread from the bag then placing it into the toaster. The casual way he went about his task infuriated her as did his next words.
‘Not that old chestnut again, Robin. I am beyond bored of hearing it and have no intention of raking over old ground when there are far more urgent matters to consider.’ Then he turned, held up a piece of bread and asked, ‘Toast?’
Robin scowled and even though her instinct wanted to storm from the room, it was also telling her she should stay. Discover what he and Nate had discussed.
Edmund tutted and shrugged. He pushed the lever down on the toaster. ‘You’d rather wither away like a martyr to the cause than do something sensible like eat and stay healthy, or perform your parish duties, honour your vows and the promises you made to me when we were married. You’re ridiculous. As is your desire to be Willow’s saviour and out of selfish spite, your quest to punish me.’
Next stop was the fridge to retrieve the butter which he brought to the table. Robin watched and silently steeled herself for whatever came next.
‘You don’t see it, do you? How Nate is suffering. Because it happened to him too, you know, or have you forgotten that? He also lost his child, and as a consequence his wife,’ he held up his palm, ‘and before you put the same old record back on, it was not my fault that some drugged-up car thief ploughed through that barrier and killed Maya. So don’t even think about laying that at my door, or anyone else’s for that matter, apart from the scum who was driving.
‘Since that day we’ve all grieved but we can’t hold Nate prisoner here, waiting for Willow to get better when she won’t. She’s never going to be the woman Nate married, the daughter we knew, and you need to face up to that. Willow needs professional care, and we need to get on with our lives.’
When she stood, it was with such force that her chair toppled over and when her palms slammed onto the surface of the table, the cutlery and china rattled, as did the whole of Robin’s body. Rattling and shaking as tremors borne of sheer hate splintered through her body.
‘And THERE we have it! This isn’t about Nate, so don’t you dare pretend it is. You’re pathetic. This is about you wanting control andyourlife back to how it was, so you listen to me, Edmund, and listen well. If Nate is so unhappy and frustrated or whatever the hell it is that’s bubbling under the surface, he knows where the door is. I don’t need his help and neither does Willow. I’ll manage just fine by myself and, for the record, if you think for one second that by shuffling Willow off to some institution, that I will just slot back into my role as devoted vicar’s wife then you have a big shock coming… Do you hear me?’
She’d studied Edmund’s face throughout and with each word his skin had moved through the colour chart from rose pink to puce and now, back down the scale to a funny white-grey.
Good. He was annoyed. Her speech had hit a nerve and boy did it feel good, so she carried on. Fatigue had left her without a filter, an unnecessary reserve that left the way clear for a green light and a chance to get it all off her chest.
‘So, where does that leave you, us? I’ll tell you, shall I. Those marriage vows you spoke of earlier go both ways and despite what you think, I do take my promises seriously, more so because I made them before God. The funny thing is, nowadays I justlovethat they serve a most wonderful purpose.’
She saw his eyebrow twitch, noticed the set of his lips drawn in a tight line, his jaw, his whole body tensed.
‘You see, Edmund dearest. Those rules you live your life by, the ones in the Bible that you’ve turned into an instrument of control, to keep your wife and children at heel, will be your downfall because as you know, I would never divorce you. And even if you had the balls to divorce me, you won’t, will you?’
It was her turn to smirk.
‘For a start, what grounds would you have? Your wife neglects you, in order to care for her grieving, mentally ill child. She refuses to carry out her duties, in all areas, because she is exhausted, drained, traumatised, yet selflessly devotes herself to the care of her daughter. Won’t you look like a good egg!’
And then she went for his Achilles heel.
‘I mean, how disappointed would the bishop be? All that arse-kissing gone to waste. Years of yes, bishop, no bishop. And I’m sure your parishioners would be shocked and unsympathetic towards the man of God who even considered divorcing his poor, bereaved wife. Are you getting the picture, Edmund?’
At this point he rallied and stood to face her and even from the opposite side of the table, the wooden barrier between them, the salt and pepper pots standing guard, flanked by a pot of jam and two mugs, he still seemed to tower above her.
