A smug look washed over Margaret’s face; yet her answer surprised him. ‘Of course I’m not. You’re far too useful to hand you over to the police. Give me credit. But from now on you’re to stay here. No more midnight wandering. Do you hear me?’
Herbert was affronted. ‘What do you mean I’m “useful”? For heaven’s sake, Margaret, you make me sound like I’m your housekeeper, not your partner.’
The snort that escaped her lips further riled Herbert and her next comment was like a red rag to a bull. ‘Partner! Don’t make me laugh. That ship has sailed and won’t be coming back. Let’s face it, the whole thing has been one incredibly pathetic let-down and there’s no way you could describe this,’ Margaret made a flicking motion with her hands, ‘as a relationship. I see it more as an arrangement, mutually beneficial and no strings attached, which is why you won’t mind that I’m going away for a few days.’
Even though the status of their relationship had already dawned on Herbert, he was actually hurt and astounded that under the circumstances she couldn’t have phrased it better and to make matters worse he felt like a fool, using the word ‘partner’. It was a slip of the tongue and he regretted it. What really blindsided him, though, was the announcement that she was going away. ‘Away, where, when?’
‘Never you mind, Herbert. The less you know the better – because I can’t have you rambling on and blurting stuff out when you go gaga on the hard stuff… You know, once the time comes.’ Margaret inclined her head and raised her eyebrows as if motioning to an invisible future event. ‘Everyone knows the diamorphine loosens tongues so it’s best you remain in the dark and my secrets remain with me.’ Margaret twisted her arm and checked her watch as though she was in a rush.
Herbert was perplexed because Margaret was talking in riddles and, in his opinion, being unnecessarily dramatic under extremely tense circumstances. ‘Margaret, I really do insist that you tell me what’s going on. And I’d like to remind you that is contrary to our agreement, which states you will care for me here, not swan off and leave me to suffer alone.’
When he finished, Margaret remained silent, impassive, her alabaster face set in stone, holding him with a stare so cold and hard that it chilled Herbert’s blood. And then she spoke. ‘And I really do insist that you do exactly as you’re told, Herbert, and stay in this house until I return. Do not answer the door to anyone and when I do get back, I promise I will uphold my side of the agreement and care for you until your dying day. Do you understand?’
Herbert really didn’t but the tone of her voice was so cool and authoritative, threatening too, that he thought it wise to tread carefully. ‘Not really, Margaret. Well, actually what I mean is yes, I’ll do as you say but no, I don’t understand why.’
‘Because you are my alibi, like I have been yours. While you are under this roof we have been inseparable, haven’t we, just like I told the police? Two little peas in a pod, cuddled up tight in our big cosy bed. Especially on the days thosewomenwere attacked, weren’t we, Herbie darling?’
Herbert stuttered, still confused. ‘Y-yes, yes of course we were, if you say so but you know as well as I do that I can’t vouch for your whereabouts all of the time and let’s face it, you’re always off somewhere zooming about in your fancy car. And we don’t sleep together so neither of us has any idea where the other is during the night…’ And then the light dawned.
Herbert stopped mid-sentence, his lips unable to move. Never in his life had he been so utterly shocked, so much so that there was a funny whistling noise in his ears and his heart beat so fast he could almost hear it thud. Feeling rather queer Herbert sat and grasped the arm of the chair. His voice when he found it was a mere whisper, his question laced with trepidation. ‘Margaret, what have you done?’
When she straightened like a headmistress about to address assembly, her eyes bored holes in Herbert’s head. ‘Absolutely nothing that you should be worried about – unless you disobey me.’
‘Margaret, please, you can’t threaten me like this… What do you mean if I disobey you? What will you do?’ To say he felt like a child was an understatement; out of control and out of his depth was more accurate.
‘I will tell the police that now I come to think of it, you may have been sneaking out at night, then I’ll show them your hiking boots covered in mud that no doubt matches that on the lane at the back of Bea’s house. Oh, and the little trophy you took from Scarlet’s home. You mustn’t have had time to get one at Bea’s. I have it and your boots hidden, ready to be produced should they be required.’
Herbert was dumbfounded; Margaret, however, was not. ‘I think you may have been drugging me, Herbert, slipping some of your morphine and a couple of sleeping tablets into my cocoa because some nights I slept like a log and didn’t wake until late morning, thus allowing you plenty of time to nip out and get back again without me noticing.’
Herbert retaliated. ‘And what if I picked that phone up right now and told them what you’ve just told me, my word against yours?’
Another snort and a patronising answer. ‘Be my guest, Herbert, go on. And when they get here I’ll tell them we’re in this together, or you’ve been threatening to kill me. But mark my word if I go, you will too. We’ll both be carted off and you’ll spend the rest of your days on remand in some stinking prison hospital. So it’s your call, make your choice.’
From somewhere Herbert mustered a retort. ‘You wouldn’t! They’d never believe you… Dear God, Margaret, what’s happened to you? Why are you doing this?’
‘To you or them?’ Margaret smirked.
‘Both… it makes no sense.’
A snappy irritated answer came with a sneer. ‘Oh it makes perfect sense, you pathetic man. Because you’re all to blame for ruining the last fifteen years of my life. First those little druggie tarts were responsible for getting you locked up in the first place, just as we were getting to know each other and you… Don’t get me started on you.’
Margaret began to pace, towards the window, then a sharp swivel and back again, up and down she went, becoming more and more agitated with every step, her voice bordering on the hysterical, screeching and so angry. ‘Because you’re an amateur, a simpleton. You got caught and I should have dumped you there and then but I was weak, a fool. But no more. After all those years traipsing back and forth, waiting patiently for your release when I would have the world in the palm of my hand, everything my heart desired, boom, it was ripped away from me. You’re going to die. I’ve suffered loneliness, derision, abuse, exclusion and on top of all that I’ll never get those wasted years back so believe me, Herbert, that woman who came visiting you is long gone and she’s had enough of all of it, everyone, you, them, this.’
Margaret flung her arms wide and the gesture left Herbert in no doubt that the whole world was weighing heavily on his clearly unhinged landlady who was scaring the shit out of him. In one of those life-flashing-before-your-eyes moments he knew that self-preservation was imperative, and whether that meant in the next few minutes or long-term, Herbert had to placate the monster. Standing on wobbly legs he warily made his way towards Margaret.
‘Please, Margaret, I beg you, do not take on so much. Let me help you. Come, take a seat and I’ll bring you some water, there. That’s right, breathe, take slow breaths.’ When she allowed him to take her arms, he noticed she was tense but by the time he’d settled her on the sofa she seemed to sag, like a rag doll, spent and still.
He made his way to the kitchen and back again and after he had handed her the glass of lukewarm water, he sat beside her and held her clammy hand.
And just like that, ping, the old Margaret was back. She stared as she spoke, softly yet still determined although the anger was gone, her tone matter-of-fact. ‘I did it for us, Herbie. I had to do something with this rage and disappointment. They had to be punished, like those pious villagers who made my life hell and I’m glad you did what you did to Mills, he deserved it. But now it’s my turn to right the wrongs and once I’ve served revenge on the last one, it will be over.’
Herbert was astounded, touched and humbled. Such a strange and evocative sensation that he’d never experienced before. So when he spoke, his words were genuine and borne of renewed respect and immense gratitude for his timid little mouse. It was an epiphany.
Herbert stroked her hand. ‘My dearest Margaret, I can’t believe you’ve done this for me, for us. Nobody has ever stood up for me, or by me for that matter, not in my whole life, like you have, so thank you for showing me that not everyone is bad and there is some good in the world. You.’
Margaret turned her head slowly, her cheek resting on the back of the sofa, a softer expression washed over her face accompanied by a kinder voice. ‘I’m sorry for the things I said, Herbie, truly am but I hope you understand why I’ve been acting the way I have.’
He nodded. ‘Of course, of course. The strain must have been immense and you are thoroughly forgiven. But what if you get caught, Margaret? I don’t want to be without you at the end, I’m utterly terrified of dying alone.’
