I hate even saying that, but I mean it. As long as she’s happy. I’d rather she call me and break my heart every day than turn to another male.
“Okay,” she says quietly. “Maybe I’ll take you up on that.”
26
PIPER
Was it stupid to have phone sex with the guy I’m trying to avoid? Maybe.
Do I regret it? No.
I just can’t help it when he purrs like that or says my name in the middle of a dirty little epithet. I try to just pretend it never happened. Even when I pass him at work and remember his offer to help me come again.
Ant doesn’t mention it. I almost wonder if it didn’t mean anything to him. Except that I constantly catch him staring at me.
We start texting more often—trading memes about our favorite Zelda games and playlists full of nerdy songs. He offers to kill Colin for me at least once per week. I laugh them off, but I’m not completely sure he’s joking.
One Thursday, we happen to meet in the hallway at work and end up having lunch together. When I complain that my schedule has made work hours last late into the evening, Ant starts asking me every night if I’ve eaten. If I say no, or don’t answer quickly enough, a green curry from Thai Me Down arrives at my front door. The first time it happens, I almost crywith appreciation. The fourth time I tell him I have too many leftovers already.
He sends egg rolls as an apology.
A couple of weeks later I finally go back to Moonshine. It’s really nice to return to my favorite little bar. Anam, Kelly, and Bailey meet me for a drink one Saturday night. I’m nervous at first but then I spot Ant across the room and wave. He stops by to say a quick hello, then pays all of our tabs without telling us.
I have to stop sending him links to things I find online and think are cool, because those things start to show up at my front door too. A woman only needs one Snorlax-shaped bean bag chair.
Me: Why did you buy this for me?
Ant: Is it the wrong one? Do you want me to send it back?
Me: No! I love him!
Ant: Good! As long as you are happy.
He’s sweet and kind and a bit obsessive. The same guy that I spent a whole weekend falling for. My brain catches on a memory of something Tiffany said.
Me: You don’t have to buy me things.
Ant: I like buying you things.
Me: Okay. But it isn’t necessary to get me to like you. We’re friends. Right?
Ant: Yes, of course we’re friends!
Me: I like my friends. I don’t need bribes.
Friends with benefits, I guess. We did agree to remain friends, but an evil little inkling hits me. I chew on a thumbnail, plotting my next move.
Me: Let’s practice, then. I’ll send you a link to something that I think is really cool, and you won’t get it for me.
Ant: I won’t?
Me: Promise that you won’t.
Ant: Yes. I promise.
Me: Okay, whatever you do, don’t buy me this.
I already know the perfect item. I send him a link to a sexy little lingerie set. It’s yellow mesh, with little daisies embroidered in very strategic places.
