Cyra guided the ship out of the hanger and braced as they lifted into the air.
“Now, Captain!” Blaize called.
Cyra slapped her hands down on the launch panel and let every bit of anger flow through her. She was angry with Captain Auvi and Varik, still. She was angry with Dez for putting her through such an emotional scene with his family. She was angry with herself for feeling any guilt for a situation she didn’t create. And most of all, she was angry that she chose her security and her crew over a family. It made no difference that Dez hadn’t asked her to choose.
She had no choice.
She wasn’t a heartless leader. But she couldn’t choose to be dependent on others in a cold universe that wouldn’t care for her one iota. She had a single opportunity for independence and security. She’d make it work, even if it broke her heart to be the instrument that parted Dez’s family again. It was just the way of the universe and she was only one small being within it.
The ship lurched through the atmosphere of the planet on a path for Cassan. The chaotic thrusting knocked the crew around in their seats, but they had strapped in tight this time. A few minutes into their long trip through space, Cyra released her restraints. Blaize and Rhysa had everything under control. Cyra left the deck, intending to rest in her quarters for a while, but instead found herself walking down the long corridor to the back of the ship. To Dez.
She paused outside his quarters, the door open. He was stretched out on the lower bunk, torso bare. The dark black stripes that swirled around his body like tattoo art mesmerized her momentarily. She shook off the strange lusty haze. “Dez? May I speak with you?”
He rose from his bunk all stealth and grace. “Of course, Captain. What can I do for you?”
“I wanted to talk to you. I… I’m sorry.”
“You have nothing to apologize for.” Except he wouldn’t meet her eyes.
“Maybe not, but I’m still sorry that you won’t see your family again. It is clear how much they mean to you.” And she hated that leaving them hurt him.
“If not for your generosity and trust, I would not have seen them at all. You have given me a gift I could never repay.”
His calm acceptance only made her more agitated. “But you did. You talked the prince into using us for a transporter.”
“Well, I talked him into trying you out. I have no idea if you’ll get another contract or not. That’s up to you.” He briefly met her gaze and a slight smile flashed across his full dark lips.
Unable to maintain the eye contact, she dropped her chin. “I wouldn’t have had the opportunity if you had not created it. So, thank you, Dez.”
“It was my honor.” His deep voice pressed the words into her heart.
He was honorable and all that was good in a male. If only they’d met in a different way, under different conditions. There might have been a chance for them to have a different relationship. But it was just wishes. Cyra reached out and touched his shoulder. He flinched slightly at the electric jolt that transferred through her. She should have recoiled, but his skin was warm and his muscles strong. Perhaps her brief touch would convey all the admiration she had for him, offer some comfort. Tears pricked at her eyes. She dropped her hand and rushed out.
There was nothing else to say.
After a long session in the water tank, Cyra went to the galley. It was her turn to attempt to cook their meal. It would be damn disappointing after dining with royalty on Din’ Gale. Her crew would have to tough it out. She wasn’t a chef, and they had to eat. At least they had better ingredients now.
Cyra did her best, but the protein was slightly burned on one side and underdone in the center. The vegetables came out better, but not by much. She sighed as she sat down with the crew. Dez was notably absent, but he probably wasn’t to company. “Sorry. I did my best.”
Rhysa laughed, “You’re a damn better captain than you are a chef, that’s for sure. I’m just happy I didn’t have to be the first one to cook after leaving Din’Gale. They spoiled us.”
“They did,” Blaize agreed looking sadly at her meal.
“I’ll take some food to Dez, and be right back.” Veda stood, taking her untouched plate and adding to it for him.
The others were picking at their own plates and choking down a few bites when an alert sounded followed by Veda’s voice over the ship’s loud speaker. “Captain, we have a medical emergency in crew quarters. I need you now.”
Cyra heart lodged in her throat. She jumped up from the table and ran Dez’s room. What if he had tried to harm himself? She shouldn’t have left him earlier. She should have invited him to join the crew for meals. She should have given him quarters to sleep in instead of keeping him in the cargo bay. If he died, she wasn’t sure what she would do. Veda had sounded frantic. Veda was never frantic. She was calm in an emergency. It had to be horrible.
“Veda?” Cyra called out as soon as she hit the crew corridor.
“In here, Cyra,” Veda replied from inside Dez’s room.
Cyra was afraid to look. His grunts and whimpers of pain hurt her ears but at least he was still alive. Cyra stepped inside tentatively. Dez was on the ground alternately writhing in pain and going board stiff. His eyes were rolled back in his head. There was no blood, no obvious injuries. “What’s going on? What’s wrong with him?”
“I don’t know.” Veda pressed her hands to his shoulders. He howled in pain and she retreated. “I found him like this when I brought him his plate. He didn’t even take a bite.”
Cyra didn’t miss the insinuation that her food was so bad it could have caused him this much pain. Dez’s scream ripped through her. He went completely limp.
