Seeing the shocked expression on Missy’s face almost made up for watching her sex tape. Almost. I couldn’t tell if she was more offended by Marty cursing, telling her she was out of her mind, or calling her “bro.” Probably all three.
“You’ll be hearing from my lawyer about this!” she said. I guessed it was the first thing she could think of to say.
“Missy,” I said slowly, “Iamyour lawyer.”
She faltered at that, a crease appearing between her perfect brows. “Oh.”
“Oh,” I repeated drily. “Please trust me when I say you won’t be getting a refund for services rendered. In fact, you’ll probably get another bill for the reversal of the divorce proceedings.”
“Chad was right,” she said. “You’re just money hungryscum!” And with that she tossed her hair over her shoulder and swept out of the office, pug firmly wedged under her arm, in a flounce that would have made Miss Piggy proud.
Marty and I stared after her, and it was Marty who spoke first. “What in the deep-friedfuck, bro?”
I couldn’t have said it better myself.
We probably would have stood there for a while longer except the phone rang, startling Marty enough that he flailed and elbowed me in the chest before going to answer the call.
While he was on the phone, I went and retrieved Missy’s file and took it back to my office. It seemed like a reversal would be fairly quick and painless—well, painless if you didn’t count having to see Missy again. Still, at least she’d stop hitting on me now.
I set the paperwork aside. I wasn’t starting anything until I heard from Chad’s lawyer, and frankly I didn’t trust Missy not to seduce the pool boy before lunch.
In the meantime I checked on the status of Danny’s case. A demand letter had been sent to his neighbor and he should havereceived it by now, but I hadn’t talked to Danny to find out if there had been any pushback.
I hadn’t talked to Danny all weekend—and I’d missed him more than I’d expected.
It was always a good time catching up with my family, but more than once I’d found myself wishing Danny was there so I could share a smile and a joke with him and introduce him to my family. I got the feeling he would have fit right in.
Of course, when my mom asked if I was seeing anybody, I’d dodged the question with my usual line about focusing on my career. But just for a moment, I’d been tempted to tell her that for once, therewassomeone.
And I’d found myself wondering for the first time if maybe this thing wasn’t quite as casual as I’d thought.
Danny had texted me on Sunday afternoon to see when I’d be home, and I’d been more pleased than I wanted to admit when his name had flashed on the screen. When I’d told him I was only just leaving Richmond and I’d be back late, he’d texted back telling me to drive safe and to let him know when I wanted to catch up. He’d added a kissing emoji, which had put a smile on my face for the entire drive home.
I picked up the phone and called his number without thinking twice, and he picked up on the third ring.
“Hey!” he said breathlessly.
“Hey. I thought we could?—”
“Can I call you back?” he interrupted. “I’m in a situation right now.”
Panic tightened my chest as I immediately imagined a robbery or a gas leak. It was almost a relief when seconds later I heard loud, angry honking in the background and work boots clattering over concrete. Whatever was going on, Danny was running. “Get that thing the fuck away from me!” he shouted, and I was pretty sure he wasn’t talking to me. There was anotherhonk,louder this time, and the line went dead. I laughed at the crazy mental image of Danny getting chased by that fucking goose, and then I felt bad. That goose was terrifying.
I sent a message to check he was okay and waited more anxiously than I wanted to admit before I got the reply.
Yeah.
And then:
Fucking goose.
I laughed again, guilt free.
My temples throbbed with an incoming headache, and I remembered Marty had forgotten my coffee. No surprises there. Although hehaddealt with Missy surprisingly effectively, so I guessed he was off the hook for today. The fact I was getting a headache because I hadn’t had a coffee was a good reason to cut down on caffeine, but after my late night last night and my run-in with Missy this morning, today was not the day to quit.
I decided to go out and get coffee myself and made it as far as the reception desk where I ran into Callahan, Marty, and Mrs. Simmons—one of Callahan’s many cousins—having a friendly chat that blocked my escape. Mrs. Simmons was about Callahan’s age, and I’d never seen her dress in anything that wasn’t a floral pattern.
“Well, here he is now,” Callahan said. “And say what you want, but Miller’s not one for blatant animal cruelty.”
