“You’re over there working yourself into a lather when it’s my fault,” he said, his voice quiet and rough. “Whatever it is.”
My nerves turned to nausea. I should’ve talked to him about this sooner, and it really wasn’t easier to broach the subject now, after so much time had passed. I rubbed the back of my neck, staring down at my lap. “I know we haven’t really talked about the ravine, but that’s because I thought there wasn’t anything to talk about. And maybe I was being a coward, too. But… I was wrong.”
I caught his faint nod out of my peripheral vision.
“You’re wrong about a lot of that, but….” Hescrubbed the back of his own neck like I just had. “You’re right. We need to talk about what I did.”
Nope. I could not let him think like that a minute longer.
I looked him straight in the eye and squared my shoulders. “You saved my life that day, Pops. I don’t care about the concussion or the ankle. I could’ve fallen anywhere, hurt myself doing any number of things. I used to see these kinds of accidents every day, all ages and circumstances. But they’re all just accidents. And I hate that you’ve been carrying that.”
Pops shook his head like he wanted to argue, but I barreled on.
“Without you, Delly wouldn’t be here.” I held his gaze. “And I mean that. If I hadn’t brought her to you and Grams that day when she was sick? She wouldn’t have made it. Which means I wouldn’t have either.”
“Adair….” His voice trembled on my name just as badly as his hands were.
Pops blurred as tears welled in my eyes. I could not stand this man who had saved our lives—literallysaved them—feeling guilty over what happened.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered. He covered his face with trembling hands, resting his elbows on the table.
“Pops,” I said gently, tears falling down my cheeks as I reached for his hands, peeling them off. “Please. If you need me to say I accept your apology, I will. But there has never been anything to apologize for. And my ankle is gonna be just fine. I promise. That part is all my fault.” I cradled his trembling hands in mine. “I’m having surgery to fix it soon. Outpatient. Minimally invasive. It should fix me up for good.”
His shoulders trembled as he finally looked at me, but then his gaze flicked over my shoulder.
“Addy… Pops…,” Delly said as she approached our table hesitantly. “What’s going on?”
I squeezed his hands before letting go, then wiped my face on my shoulder.
“I’m getting my ankle fixed,” I said, turning toward my sister.
Delly looked between me and Pops, frowning as she studied us. Then she sat down in the chair beside me and threaded her hands in her lap. “I’d like to know what really happened at the ravine.”
I looked at Pops, not needing his permission, but wanting it. He dipped his chin.
“I slipped and fell, Delly. Hit my head and hurt my ankle. Mild concussion and some shallow cuts. Pops pulled me up from the ledge and dragged my unconscious butt through the snow to the four-wheeler.” I smiled, still in awe after so many weeks. “Which was broken, by the way. He got it fixed, hoisted me onto it, and got me to help. I still don’t know how he did it, but then again… he’s always been Superman, hasn’t he?”
“He has,” Delly agreed, her voice thick as she fixed her gaze on Pops.
He flushed red, dropping his gaze to his lap. “Tell her the rest, Addy,” he said softly.
“Okay,” I agreed. “I didn’t follow my treatment plan very well. I should’ve stayed off my foot for several weeks, but I didn’t. So, I’m getting the damage I caused repaired now. The scheduler should be calling today to let me know how soon they can squeeze me in. Dr. Patel is pulling some strings for me to get it fast-tracked.”
“Adair was looking for me,” Pops said, lifting his chin. “That’s why he was out there in the woods. And kids.…” He frowned, looking so despondent that my tears started again, but I ignored them. “I was hiding things from you.The way I’ve been forgetting things, on top of….” He raised his hands from his lap, displaying the fine tremble in them.
“But Pops,” Delly started, “What if Adair hadn’t been so clumsy, and you kept hiding it? What if we came back to the cabin and something terrible had happened?” She looked between us seriously as a tentative smile bloomed on her face. “So, really, it’s all kind of a good thing, isn’t it? It worked out?”
Damn.
Flashes of the past few weeks flipped through my mind like a Rolodex.
The first time I saw Ireland’s indigo blue eyes.
Bearing witness to the quiet, deep care she provided for her dad.
The way my heart had started to beat faster whenever I saw Ireland, begging her to take it.
I swallowed thickly. “Let’s call it good, okay?”
