“I'm sorry I even asked. Forget it. God, Paige, she looks just like me. I can't get over it.”
“I know. My friend Emily—she was the friend with me at Zickell's that night—sure thinks so too.” Paige stifled a giggle. “My friends all call Irie the miracle baby, by the way.”
“Why is she the miracle baby?”
“Because you wore a condom, and you pulled out before you came. Although, after what you told me today about your ex?”
She let the rest of her thought go unsaid, but Lance's vision tunneled with the implication. “Oh my God. Thecondom, Paige! My ex—fuck, she must've found the condom in my wallet and poked a hole in that one, too!”
Paige pursed her lips and nodded. “Yep. I figured that one out when you told me about her. They say condoms are 98% effective, right? I always thought Irie beat the odds, but maybe the game was rigged in the first place.”
“I guess she's not as much of a miracle as you thought, then.”
“You kidding? She single-handedly found her famous father at a hockey game and dragged you back into our lives. That's a bigger miracle, if you ask me.”
Lance cracked a smile and took another peek at his daughter in the back seat. “She's amazing, isn't she? Just like I told your Mom.”
Paige went quiet. “Sorry you had to listen to her rant, by the way.”
“What rant? Oh, you mean the one about how Irie's father is a dead beat loser who missed out on a huge chunk of Irie's life, like her first steps and her first words and man, doesn't he feel like such an idiot, since he will never,everget to experience the pure joy of those moments, which are now forever lost?”
“Yep. That's the speech,” Paige said with a gulp. “Although you seem to remember a few more traumatic details than I do.”
“Funny thing is, before she started that rant, I wasthisclose to telling them.” Lance pinched a half-inch of air between his thumb and forefinger.
“I wondered if you might.”
“Would you have been pissed?”
“Well, I would've had a lot of explaining to do … but no. I wouldn't have been mad. I just figured we have so much to talk about first—me and you—and all that needs to be hashed out before we go telling anyone.”
“I get that. But it just doesn't seem right to keep it a secret from them. And meanwhile, they're blaming this other dude for being a lousy Dad? C'mon, Paige. That's not fair.”
Paige grimaced guiltily. “I know. It's my fault. I just couldn't bear to tell them the truth. They were already so upset when they found out I had a baby,gasp,out of wedlock. They just assumed it was Adam's before I could tell them otherwise. And Adam had already conveniently taken himself out of the picture, and no one could track him down, so … I went with it. What can I say? I feel awful, Lance. I've been letting them believe this lie. And as bad as that is, I always thought the truth was so much worse.”
“What, thatI'mthe father?”
“No. That the father was a one-night stand. That I didn't have the slightest idea who you really were or how to get in contact with you. And that scared me so bad. I really didn't think I'deverfind you, and I'd never have anything to tell Irie about her father. I know it doesn't excuse lying, but … I felt so terrible about it.”
“But didn't you try to find me?”
“Yes! I've been trying to find you since the day I peed on that stick and got the surprise of my life! But all I had to go on was 'Lance from Boston.' I went back to Zickell's and asked them if they knew anything about you. In fact, I even made them check their security camera footage, but no one recognized you. I hung out there almost every night while I was pregnant with her. And no, don't worry, I only drank soda waters with lemon. But I had nothing else to go on, and typing your name into Facebook turns up more than a few Boston-based Lances, none of which looked anything like you.”
“Well, I'm not on Facebook, but honestly?” Lance smiled ironically. “I'm kinda surprised you didn't find me just based on that. I'mthemost important Lance in Boston, after all.”
Paige snickered. “Ah, there's that ego again. After seeing you be so caring and good with Irie, and so polite with my parents, I was beginning to wonder if cocky Lance would ever reappear.”
He patted her thigh. “Just needed a little time to find my footing, that's all.”
“Anyway, we're almost to my place,” Paige said quietly.
Lance watched out the window. They weren't in the Nashville suburbs anymore. On Lance's right, they zoomed past a number of industrial-looking buildings, with large lots packed with semi-trailers and bulldozers and crates. On the left was a strip mall with a laundromat, a liquor store, a loan store, a bar …
This wasn't exactly the good part of town.
“Do your parents help you out at all?” Lance asked.
“You mean with money? No. But they help me out with Irie. More than you can imagine.”
