So, I let her stare as I gazed at the window, watching the sea roll by. Through blurry vision, swallowing every few minutes, determined to shove it down and away.
Thaan had herded me out as soon as Pheolix opened his eyes, telling Deimos to call him a carriage north. I’d been too nervous to even attempt saying goodbye, certain Thaan would turn around and kill him again if I dared. I might have tried to double back had he not walked me all the way to my apartment, inviting himself in and sitting across from Cebrinne on the couch as I ventured to the bedroom to change.
I’d peeled off my dress, fingers grazing over the bruises across my ribs. With Thaan’s help, the knife wounds were already gone, swept under a layer of fresh new skin. But the purple stamps laid by Emilius’s knuckles lay deeper.
Some base part of my body realized that if there were a time to fall apart, to curl into a ball and let myself cry without anyone to watch, it would be now. But for some reason, I couldn’t even bring myself to try.
Maybe I could later, when it hit me.
But whateveritwas, it hadn’t hit yet. It paced instead, nose to the floor, sniffing out my steps as it tracked me. Waiting to land when I least expected it. I selected a new dress from my wardrobe, feeding it over my head. Grief I wasn’t ready to process, guilt and shame and ugly truth wrapped into the fur and jaws of some dark predator stalking my every step.
When I’d finally emerged, Thaan was gone. Ceba stood, taking a deep breath. “Ready?”
I imagined she knew what happened.
At least, she had to have some idea. Pheolix had left with me last night. He hadn’t returned. He’d come to every one of our past missions to Venusia.
But he wasn’t here now. And she didn’t ask why.
She didn’t ask if I was all right either. Normally, she would have. She’d have fussed over me in that way that was both grouchy and worried, stern but sincere. But with a clean swish of skirts, she’d walked out our apartment door and onto the sky bridge, into sunshine too bright and weather too warm, and hadn’t glanced back.
And here we sat in the coach, without having said a word.
The silence crowded us, but I couldn’t banish it with words. I was almost sick of it by the time the air tasted of salt. I slid from my seat, slamming the door shut. Aegir and Sindri waited for us in the shallow waves. TheViderestraightened when he spotted us, wading out from the water. “Vouri returned to the palace an hour ago.” He glanced at the carriage, eyes narrowed. “What’s wrong? Where’s the gnat?”
Two months ago, he’d said that word with liquid derision, but something like concern poured from him instead. It was all I needed to make my mouth twist and my lungs tighten.
“Thaan sent him back to the mountains,” Cebrinne said flatly. She watched the sand, unwilling to look at us.
Aegir blinked. His eyes met mine. “What’s going on? What happened?”
“Selena?” Ceba prompted, tucking her fists into her hips. She finally lifted her eyes to mine. Accusing.
I sucked in a deep breath, facing the siren monarch, and tried to keep my voice from cracking. “I had a job to do during the masquerade. It went sideways. Pheolix is out. It has no bearing on what we’re here to accomplish. But Thaan is getting impatient. He’ll pull us from this mission if we don’t act soon. But I have an idea.”
Cebrinne raised her brows. “I haven’t heard of any idea.”
“Well, we’ve barely spoken since yesterday,” I reminded her, a little too evenly.
She glowered at my tone.
“Let’s go,” Aegir said, eyes shifting between us. “You can tell me more about Pheolix and this idea you have.”
My sister cocked a hip. “I want to hear it here,” she snapped. “How you messed up. How it wentsideways. What’s your idea?”
We all stared at her in mute surprise. But slowly, Sindri and Aegir tore their gaze from Cebrinne to me. Waiting.
“Thaan can’t touch water,” I said, throwing her a flinty look for putting me on the spot. “That’s why we were looking for the stones in the first place. They hold power connected to Thaan’s curse. Sidra can’t come onto land; she’ll starve herself of air. And Thaan won't survive in the sea.”
Aegir slanted his gaze at Cebrinne. “What do you propose?” he asked me.
“Vouri is newlycordaed. She’s positioned where we need her. She’s offered to bait Thaan. Numerous times.”
Aegir’s eyes narrowed toward the sea. “I placed Vouri in Thaan’s camp to gather information. Not to use her as bait.”
“The risk would be minimal,” I pushed, avoiding the cut of Sindri’s eyes. “She’d merely have to be nearby. Close enough for Thaan to scent her new bond and think it's Ceba. He’d venture down here with his drones. And you’d level an attack. You’d have to fight without water-calling.” I sighed. “That would be your greatest risk. But he only has about thirty of them, a number you can overwhelm with your colony, and you might not get another chance. We’d have to act now. We need to turn around and head back to Calder. Tell Thaan that it’s done.”
Aegir raised a hand. “You are not willing to lose a sister, Selena, and neither am I. Vouri is the last of my family line. She’s all I have left. My answer is no. She can be some randomlycordaedNaiad in Thaan’s office, but she won’t be a target for his attention.”
