Amber might as well have punched me physically. I gasped out loud and blinked my eyes. My throat was feeling like a cactus was stuck down there and speaking would hurt.
“Amber, that was harsh,” Tina whispered but I said nothing. I couldn’t!
My lifeline had failed and there was no one left to pull me out of the dark pit I was falling into. My nose tickled from the sobbing that wanted out, and once again, I felt grief hit me like a panic attack.
I couldn’t see Tyton and tell him how awful I felt about a woman’s getting hurt because of my book.
No phone line could ever reach my mom and let her tell me that things would be all right. And there was no going back to the house for one of Nana’s wonderful healing sessions.
If only I could curl up with one of my sisters and share my worries for a while or get a bear hug from my dad. I suppressed the sob in my chest, closed my eyes, and remembered how he would always kiss me on the top of my hair and call me Miss Freckle.
They were all gone!
Justin would never prank me again and we would never celebrate another birthday in our family.
I didn’t even have Nellie anymore.
“Devina, are you there? Is there a bad connection?” Tina sounded like she’d said my name several times, but my body weighed a thousand kilos and I had no strength to answer her.
Ending the call, I let my chin fall and gave in to the despair I felt. If I died this very minute, no one would miss me.
Two hours later, there was a knock on my door.
I had expected it and had calmed down enough to open the door with a polite smile that never reached my eyes.
Two women stood outside and introduced themselves as Leonie and Marcy, asking if they could come in.
Opening my door all the way, I gestured for them to go ahead.
“We’ve been wanting to talk to you for a while about your book.” Leonie angled her head and gave me a sugar-sweet smile. “As you might have heard, it has had an unfortunate effect on many of your readers who now seem to think that Nmen are kind and wonderful people. With our history of their kidnapping and enslaving our women to breed for them, you can see why that’s unfortunate, can’t you?”
“That was more than a hundred years ago.”
“Still, by painting a picture of them as heroic and evolved men, you’ve inspired many women to try and go there. Several have been hurt in the process but at least so far, we’ve managed to save all of them from actually crossing the border.”
I didn’t speak.
Leonie folded her hands in front of her and sat up straight. “As of today, the Council has requested that your book be banned.”
“Yes, I’ve heard.”
“Would you mind telling us what inspired you to write the book in the first place? You used to live close to the border, correct?”
“Yes.”
“Have you ever had any contact with someone from the other side of the wall?”
“Do you mean if I exchanged letters myself?”
“Yes.”
“What would it change if I did? You’ve already decided that you’re banning my book.”
They looked a bit surprised by my confrontational question.
“We’re just trying to understand more about the situation. Can you confirm that you went to your doctor three days ago?”
“Yes.”
