“F. I. N. L. E. Y?” she asked.
Shit. I wasn’t sure. “I think so,” I replied.
I waited patiently, and a couple of minutes later, I heard her appreciation loud and clear over the phone. “Holy hot damn hell, Kenz,” she squealed. “What the hell kind of water is in the lake at Lakeside?”
“Right?” I laughed.
“And how do you know they’re not interested in you? Everyone’s interested in the new girl,” she argued. “That’s like…part of what makes the Universe go round.”
“Well, I’m just a dime-a-dozen here,” I disagreed. “And if you’re drooling over their pictures, like I know you are, you can clearly see that those two brothers can probably get any girl they want. I am not anything special here, Julez.”
“I think you actually believe that bullshit,” she tsked. “You’ve always been special, Kenzlee. You just hung out with people who couldn’t see that.”
“How’s Scott?” I asked, changing the subject. Scott Middleton was Julie’s boyfriend of about a year, or so, and while he had money like the rest of them, he wasn’t a jerk about it. He was actually a decent guy. And he was fucking crazy about Julie.
“Wonderful as always,” she sing-songed. “And I’m not going to water down how wonderful he is to soften the blow to anyone who isn’t dating someone as wonderful as him.”
I laughed, and it was probably the first real genuine laugh I’ve had in ages. “As you shouldn’t,” I told her. “Yell it to the world, girl.”
“I do,” she quipped. “Often.”
“Just don’t make me wear some godawful monstrosity of a bridesmaid dress when the time comes,” I teased. “I do not want to have to wear some tangerine taffeta suffocating contraption.”
“First off, you’d look great in tangerine,” she sassed. “Second, if we do get married, it’ll be after college, and who knows what will be passing for bridesmaid dresses by then.”
Her casual mention of college caused a pang in my chest, but I knew she hadn’t meant anything by it. Besides, the world didn’t need to be miserable right alongside me just because my parents were narcissistic fools.
“There’s always Vegas,” I reminded her.
“Sounds perfect to me,” she snorted.
The rest of the conversation was avoiding anything at all to do with Madison Prep.
Chapter 7
The hidden steel in our spines.
Kenzlee~
Iwasn’t in the mood today.
After getting off the phone with Julie, I had laid awake doing the worst thing a person could do. I thought nonstop about the past four years and everything I couldn’t change.
Funny thing, that.
The things that do keep us up at night should be the things wecanchange. We should stay up thinking of all the ways we can change our unfortunate circumstances for the better. Instead, we stay up thinking about things that are beyond our control. And that makes no sense. What’s the point? What’s the purpose in worrying over things you cannot do anything about?
My brother was dead. No amount of wishing I had gone to our parents mattered. My parents were broke. No amount of wishing they had made better choices mattered.
None of those torturous wishes mattered.
I stayed up last night thinking about Kaden, my parents, Madison Prep, Julie, hell, even Cameron. I thought about everything that wasn’t anymore. And then that led me to start thinking about what was, and that sent me down another spiraling rabbit hole. It made me start thinking about Talon Draven and what the hell I was going to do about him.
I knew I needed to stay away from him, but what if he didn’t stay away from me? Then what? Because I couldn’t lie and say I was strong enough to fight him off, because I wasn’t sure I was. Even if I wasn’t an emotional, psychological, and physical wreck, there was no denying the guy was hot as all get out. Those damn eyes of his, alone, were enough to make you forget he was a jerk. He was tall, broad, strong, and if Alex’s rumors were true, the boy could fight. He was the epitome of male force and protection. And he adored his sister. Alex said the rumor was that he absolute adored his sister, and that was worse than thinking he was jerk. A jerk with no redeeming qualities was just an asshole. But a jerk who loved his sister was plain dangerous.
“I’m thinking we can ask if we can switch your locker closer to mine,” Alex piped up beside me. “It’ll be so much easier since we have first period together, don’t you think?”
I shrugged a shoulder. “That’s not a bad idea,” I agreed. “But I wouldn’t hold our breaths.”
