Well, except for ourmother.
Michael’sstrength was his calm, cool demeanor. While I could juggle alotof demands andexpectations, Michael could remain calm even when he was in the eyeof the storm. While everyone around him panicked and franticallytried to find reason, Michael could compartmentalize and findsolutions to any crisis.
The flipside to his coin was his temper.Michael’s temper rarely came out. I mean, very rarely. But when itdid…Jesus, Mary and Joseph, was it a sight to behold. Michael notonly lost his temper, he got violent. Scary violent.
And he had thescars to prove it. It was the only way we could tell him apart from Gabriel.
And it didn’thelpthat he could fight likea caged animal just sprung loose.
We all could.
Our father madesure his sons grew up with all the expectations of what a real manis supposed to be-in his eyes. So, wewere all bred to all be intelligent, groomed, strong,ambitious and ferocious.
Separately, we werehard to take on, but together…there’s been no one-so far-that’sbeen able to stop us whenever we’ve gone after somethingtogether.
And now we wereall together again andBlaineview has been in an uproar over it.
Guysare trying to become our‘bros’ and girls are tripping over themselves trying to land one ofus. I get it, but I don’t.
Hanging outwith random guys has never been an issue for me. I don’t mindrunning with a crowd, I justwouldn’t call anyone here an actual friend.
I’ve hung out,gone to parties and have even gone on weekend trips camping orwhatever, but not one person on this campus has ever been invitedto my house. It’s not a secret where I live, but it’s also not a secret that if you haven’tbeen personally invited to my house by, either me or Aiden…or Iguess now Michael or Gabriel, too…then you better not come knockingon our door.
Over the years,a few bold-or stupid-people have tried showing up unexpectedly, and every time, it turned outunfavorable for them.
One girl ranaway in tears and sheswitchedschools.
Again, I haveproblems connecting and sympathy was not an emotion that affectedme often. And as far as when I felt the need toget my dick wet…well, that’swhen I take a weekend to myself and drive the two hours to the cityand hook up with someone I’ll never see again.
And I only usethe condoms I buy, and I putthem on myself. I also inspect them before andafterwards.
A littleparanoia at work? Yeah,maybe…but it beats the alternative.
And as far as Iknow, Aiden exercises the same methods, only he wets his droughtwith more than one woman on the weekends he gets away. Gabriel hasa steady girlfriend...or had, I’m not sure whatthe deal is now that he’s atBlaineview. While Gabriel loves her, I’m not sure where she stoodwith long distant relationships. And I’m almost positive thatMichael is a virgin.
By choice.
Our father’scoming of age talk was him telling ushe didn’t care what we did as long as there weren’tpictures, promises or unwanted pregnancies. So, when I had arealtalk with my younger brothers as they matured,Michael had said I didn’t need to worry about him because he had noplans on getting involved with random girls next door.
He said hewasn’t going to fuck anyoneuntil he was positive she could handle his intensity and survivethe experience.
I had to admit, hisstatement had been a bit alarming at the time. But I get itnow.
When Michaelfinallydecides to claimsomeone, it’s going to be for life, and God help any man who darescome in contact with the poor unsuspecting female.
He’llkillthem.
And I get it…I reallydo.
I’ve spent mostof my life unable to connect with other people.Except for my brothers, I don’t think I’ve everfelt anything beyond the superficial with any other humanbeing.
Did it hint atthe makings of a sociopath?Maybe.
But the only reason Iknew I wasn’t a complete psychopath…??
I locked eyeswith her our freshman year when she looked lostand like she wanted to ask me for help. The lookon my face must have discouraged her because she took one look atme and walked away.
But I’ll never forgethow looking into that girl’s hazel eyes made me feeleverything.
