Page 91 of Disillusioned


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The feeling which first drinking Lilac’s blood tonight had cured. Or, so he’d thought.

Garin wantedmore. He shut his eyes.

The wetness at her wrist began to run through his fingers, so warm and inviting. “What are you doing?”

“Feeding you.”

He froze. He could hear the quickening of her heartbeat, inwardly cursing her, working to slow the numbing rush of adrenaline that began to flood his body.

“No,” he said through his aching teeth. “I can’t.”

“What do you mean?” She glanced down at him, her cheeks flushed. “Why can’t you?”

The instinct in him that yearned to indulge in his carnal pleasures roused at the challenge. Garin had respected the women he slept with, at least enough to not make them his meal at the same time. He’d fed from them before or after, sometimes both, but never during. Other vampires thought differently, such as Casmir, who regularly brought eager donors to The Fenfoss Inn; little did they know, feeding while having sex was a risk for even the most experienced vampires.

It was a dangerous fantasy, a game of predator and prey. It wasn’t a matter of morals for Garin. He simply knew himself too well; try as he might to suppress this trait, he brought a certain fervency to every endeavor he pursued, including lovemaking and feeding. He wouldn’t try to combine the two now, not under the influence of the mead. With Lilac, he would lose himself.

“I haven’t. It is too much of a risk.”

“There’s a first time for everything,” she said simply, though the little hitch in her breath and crease on her forehead told him this surprised her.Excitedher. “Take what I am offering, Garin.”

She was so foolish, so greedy, the way she looked down at him. Beckoning.Didn’t she know he wanted it? Didn’t she know how difficult it was for him to pretend he didn’t? Once the blood touched his mouth again, it would begin all over. Being sated only to thirst again.

What was this hunger driving him mad?

“The first time we slept together, I was bound by my biting curse. Forbidden from taking from you. I don’t think you realize how easily I could take from you now. Continue to, even when you’ve decided I’ve gone too far.”

“Okay.”

He glanced up at her, how quick she was to respect his wishes. “Okay?”

Lilac held out her hand. “Then let’s go. Leave with me.”

Garin didn’t know how to answer, or even begin to explain what he felt—just what was barring him from leaving this room. He hungered forher, certainly her company and her body, but there was something more. He had craved her since the moment they met, but he’d never sought her blood in a way that concerned him for her own safety.

He could not bear the thought of her in anyone else’s possession. He’d forced her from his family’s inn, said things he’d immediately regretted.

What lay beyond these walls? Beyond the night? What was their future together, with or without the threat of war?

Garin slowly removed his hands from her; they were shaking again. This couldn’t happen. What about all he’d done to ensure she make the right choice? What about seeing that she had a second chance to at least hear Maximilian’s undeniable offer at her castle, before her parents and council, where she could not attempt to assassinate him?

What about Brocéliande, his coven, and his family at the inn? How would they fare in a war against France, if not prevented in time?

He closed his eyes. Tonight, Garin was not himself. He knew nothing of reason.

“Will you let me leave?” she challenged as he reluctantly glimpsed her. “Would you let me get up, dress myself, and walk out of this room? Away from you?”

He felt his muscles twitch, the tremendous energy there coiling, excited for the chance to spring. The thought alone made his throat burn, thirst like a fist around his airpipe. If she walked away, he wouldn’t let her get within a few feet of that door. They both knew it.

“I am a pawn to my desires tonight. More than I have ever been.”

There was no hesitation on her face, no tremble in her voice. “Then drink.”

Hesitantly, Garin slipped his hands under her and gently lifted, guiding her over his cock. This felt good. It felt right, the way she squirmed and released her weight onto his hands.

But he stopped her, his voice hoarse. “Do you want me to fuck you while I feed from you, Lilac?”

Her mouth tightened with impatience, her rapid pulse deepening as she brought her dripping wrist over his mouth.