There are a lot of things the old him wouldn’t be doing right now. Having dinner with me on a Sunday night being one of them.
What on earth was I thinking inviting him, of all people, to my tiny condo for pizza? I hated pizza. It was official. There was no longer a question or doubt in my mind. I’d officially lost my mind tonight during that attempted robbery.
Griffin exited his truck with the same confidence he used to waltz around high school with, and my nervous heart fluttered against my breastbone. I so wasn’t prepared for this. I crossed my shaking arms over my chest, trying to exude a confidence I wasn’t feeling. I just wanted to go inside, lock the door, put a chair up against it, curl into bed with a tub of ice cream I didn’t have, and cry. But that wouldn’t be happening tonight.
Nope.
I would be entertaining Griffin when I felt like the world was collapsing around me.
I missed my mom so much.She would know what to do, what to say. Her arms would feel safe when the world no longer felt safe. The grocery store wasn’t safe anymore. A place I’d been going my whole life.
Why did he have to be there today?
“You’ve got that look on your face.” His lips tilted in the smallest smirk, and my heart stopped in my chest.Why did he still get to me like this?“The same one from high school. You pinch your brows, bite your bottom lip, and your eyes glow with hatred.”
He stopped at my trunk and waited for me to make my way to him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I grumbled as Islowlymade my way closer. “This is my face. If you don’t like it, then don’t look at it.” He chuckled and shook his head at me, amusement playing in his eyes. But I could see the lingering exhaustion there that came with the crash of an adrenaline rush.
“All right. No need to be so defensive, Tate,” he said as I led him toward my building. “Not trying to make fun of you, kitten. Put the claws away.”
I stopped and whirled around, causing him to bump into me.
“I knew it was too good to be true.” I jabbed my finger against his hard, toned chest. “You haven’t changed at all, have you?” I waited for his cocky response, all while my brain short-circuited from our proximity. I was waiting for an excuse to pounce on him like he said, to sink my fucking claws into himfor hurting me over and fucking over when my dad left, and then my brother and then, worst of all, my mother.
He had only intensified the pain that had been drowning me when he was supposed to be my best friend. The kind who holds you up, the kind who lends a shoulder to cry on, the one who hugs you and tells you it’s going to be okay even when the world is on fire.And he had failed me,and I couldn’t let it go.
“Oh, I’ve changed, kitten. Might want to get me inside your condo before I show the whole parking lot. You seemed to really enjoy it the other night.” He wiggled his brows, and I scowled.Men.
“Shut up! Stop that, Griffin. Don’t be a jerk. I told you it was a mistake.” I stormed the rest of the way to my building, up the stairs, and stomped down the hall as fast as my short legs could carry me down the carpeted hallway.
Elton John was blaring from my neighbor’s door, and the heavy stench of marijuana floated into the hallway. Katie’s on-and-off boyfriend must have ended things again. It was a vicious, rough cycle she continued to put herself through when she could just find someone better.
I didn’t glance behind me at Griffin as I stuck my key in the lock and fidgeted with it until the lock turned. I jiggled the doorknob until it opened. “Looks like you need some maintenance,” he mumbled behind me.
At least he didn’t make a stupid joke about how I’d always struggled with locks. He had loved to get on my nerves about my locker when we were in high school.
“Didn’t seem to bother you the other night. It’s fine. I like things that aren’t perfect.”
“Have you always been this feisty, Tate, or is it the new you? I don’t remember you having claws in high school. Lately, all you can seem to do is attack.” He followed me intothe small condo, kicking off his sneakers at the door where my runners were neatly tucked into the corner.
He noticed.
He turned to where I was still standing at the door, holding it open like a damn idiot. Clenching my jaw, I quickly closed it so I wouldn’t look stupider than I already felt.
“I learned to stand up for myself. No one was going to do it for me,” I muttered as I kicked off my own shoes. Double-checking that I threaded the dead bolt, I headed into the kitchen and went straight for the fridge, praying for a cold beer or two. He stayed behind, inspecting the locks on the front door like he, too, was paranoid that the robbers might just burst through at any second.
I didn’t like to drink every night. It wasn’t healthy, and I always regretted it the next morning, but tonight, I needed something to numb my nerves. I didn’t want stupid fruit for dessert, with veggies and chicken for dinner. I didn’t want water. I didn’t want to count calories. I wanted beer and greasy pizza.I almost died tonight.The thought struck me, and I froze. In the middle of the kitchen, I just froze.
“You good, Grace?” he said from behind me, pulling the bags from my death grip and dumping them onto the counter. I nodded numbly and went to the fridge.
Finding two beers in the fridge, I offered one to Griffin, who took both from me and popped the caps effortlessly. He handed one of the bottles back to me wordlessly. Bringing the bottle to my lips, I took a long pull, the cold liquid racing down my throat.
Yep. This was exactly what I needed.
I could get through tonight. Griffin and I weren’t in high school anymore. We weren’t enemies. We were just old classmates, friends if you must, who now worked together. Who nearly died in a shooting.
I nearly died tonight.
Taking a shaky step back, I leaned against the counter, letting it take my weight. I suddenly felt weak, the exhaustion really making itself known.
