Julian nodded. “So you’re gonna doit?”
“No. I don’t think so. I don’t need the money and I don’t need the drama of publishing again. I like writing just for myself.” I brushed the hair off his forehead. “You have no idea how stressful publishing canbe.”
Julian tilted his head and studied me. “But you gave Sabrina your book toread.”
“I…” I blew out a breath.Caught.“Yeah.”
“Uh huh. So you might be scared that people won’t like it, but you want it to be read.Right?”
“Maybe.”
“And we laugh in the face of fear now,right?”
I snorted. “Dowe?”
Julian smiled softly. “We do.Youdo. This is a shot at redemption, baby. And you deservethat.”
I shrugged. “It’s all hypothetical now anyway. Let’s see what Sabrina thinks once she readsit.”
“And the other thing?” Julian prompted. “Yourdad?”
“I don’t know, Jules.” I chafed his outer arms absently. “I know what Ishoulddo,but…”
“You’ll regret it if you don’t,” he said solemnly. “Even if it’s terrible? Even if it escalates into, like, a fistfight on top of the Empire StateBuilding—”
“Wow. That… would be a hell of anescalation.”
“Even if it all goes totally wrong and nothing gets resolved, you’ll know you tried. That’s a really huge deal. When my dad died—” Hehesitated.
“Your mom told me,” I said, brushing my thumb over his cheekbone. “The basic factsanyway.”
“Did she?” Julian huffed out a laugh. “She must really likeyou.”
“I think she really lovesyouand she wanted me to know why it’s not easy for you to talk about thingssometimes.”
He nodded. “Yeah. Well. It wassucha stupid fight we had, Daniel. Looking back—” He shook his head and his blue eyes went hazy. “It plays out like some kind of teen drama. Not a very good one. And that was such a shitty way for us to leave things, you know? That wasn’tus. That wasn’tme. Iknowhe knew that I loved him and I was just angry.” He tapped his temple. “But I don’tknow it.”He tapped his chest above his heart. “If I had a chance to talk to him one more time? You’d better believe I’d takeit.”
I nodded slowly. Julian was right and I knew it,but…
He splayed his palms over my cheeks. “I see you’ll need convincing,” heteased.
My lips twitched. “You cantry.”
Julian lifted up on his tiptoes and pressed his lips to mine… and then his phone rang out in the livingroom.
“Shit. Left it in my coat pocket,” he said, stepping back from our embrace and holding up a restraining hand. “Hold that thought. Don’t move amuscle.”
I grinned and relaxed back against the refrigerator, thinking maybe I could get Julian to move hisconvincingto thebedroom.
But out in the living room, Julian had answered the phone, and I knew immediately that my plans were going to be put onhold.
“Calm down, Theo! I can barely understand you. What do you meanmissing? I thought you told me earlier that everything was fine?” Julian huffed out a breath. “How long has she beengone?”
