His attention drifted to the night sky outside her windows. “I’ve done something awful.” His voice dropped an octave as he added, “And I got caught.”
The revelation was like a spear in her heart. “What do you mean awful?” She held her mind back from racing through all the possibilities. Had he been unfaithful to Hillary? That would explain a lot.
“It’s not what you’re thinking,” he said, establishing that he could still read her mind. He set his mug on the coffee table and leaned over his knees, his hands trembling as he knitted his fingers to steady them.
He was scaring her. She placed her mug on the nearby table. “Merritt, what did you do?” Her voice was nearly a whisper.
“The details don’t matter. In fact, the less you know, the better. But, it’s serious,” Merritt started, his voice a mixture of defeat and regret. “I’ve just learned that for months now, I’ve been under a secret FBI investigation. They’re looking into my connections with a foreign diplomat from Egypt. It appears they have evidence that I accepted significant sums in exchange for political favors.”
Reva’s hand flew to her chest. “Oh, my God.” She closed her eyes tightening them against the revelation.
Merritt’s hands were now shaking uncontrollably. “They’re alleging that I violated the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act and potentially committed acts of treason. I’m likely to be charged with bribery, misuse of office, and breaching national security protocols.” His eyes, once confident and piercing, now held a shadow of the man he used to be. “The funds were masked as donations to my campaign. In truth, they were direct payments influencing legislative decisions.”
Reva leapt from her seat. “Merritt! No!” Unbidden moisture flooded her eyes as she paced the floor. “That isn’t you.” She turned to face him. “This is a joke, right?”
Tears streamed down his cheeks. “I was blinded by ambition, Reva. And now, everything I’ve built is on the verge of collapsing.” His voice trailed off as he looked away, the gravity of his choices and the impending consequences settling heavy in the room.
Reva knotted her fist and brought it to her mouth, biting the skin as if the pain might mask the agony she felt inside.
Merritt met Reva’s questioning gaze, her turmoil swirling like a storm. “I came to you because, despite everything, you know me better than anyone else,” he confessed, his voice thick with emotion. “You were there at the start of my dream, believing in me, pushing me to follow my political aspirations.” His voice dropped. “Despite what it cost you.”
He wiped his eyes with the back of his broad hand. “I couldn’t bear the thought of you finding out from the news and not from me.” His gaze returned to his hands that were clasped tightly together. “I needed you to hear it directly from me, to know the truth behind the headlines that will soon break. I’m not seeking forgiveness from anyone, Reva. I don’t deserve that. But before the world judges me, I wanted someone who knew the man I once aspired to be to understand the depth of my regret. You’re my best friend…you deserve that much.”
His words hung heavy in the air, a witness to the gravity of his revelation and the remnants of a bond that had meant everything. The notion did not pass that he’d called her his best friend. Present tense.
“What about Hillary?”
Merritt rubbed his forehead. “She left me.”
“Left you? And the kids?”
“They are all at her parents’ house in New Jersey. She’s agreed to appear when I make my public statement, but it’s over. She left no doubt of that.”
“Oh, Merritt. I’m so sorry. About it all.” She still couldn’t reconcile the news with who she knew him to be. How could he have gone so off course? She couldn’t bear to think about what lay ahead for him.
She looked into his eyes, hating the despair she saw there. She’d once carried that look. There was a time long ago when she was so ashamed of her drinking that she could barely hold her head up.
Is that why he came to her? Did he know she would understand?
Still, there was no excuse for what he’d done. And from the sounds of things, he was going to pay dearly.
The knowledge broke her.
She moved to the spot before him and folded to the floor, took his hands into her own. “Listen to me, Merritt. You are not the sum of the crimes you committed. You are better than that. You are deeply valued by your creator…and by me. Nothing changes that.” She squeezed his fingers tightly with her own. “You will get through this. And when you are on the other side, you’ll find a way to compensate for your poor choices. Make things right. Your bad decisions can be redeemed.”
She longed to trace his chin with her finger, assure him he would never lose her friendship. Nothing could remove how she felt about him…continued to feel about him despite their moving on from each other.
As if reading her thoughts, he squeezed back. “I’m not staying in Thunder Mountain. I would never do that to you.”
She nodded. “You’re married,” she whispered.
“Yes.”
If everything was different, they might stay up until dawn talking about old times. Times they had made each other blissfully happy, and they’d laugh about the times they made each other blisteringly mad. They’d reminisce their love story like two people reflecting on a movie, their memories slightly different now, tinged with bittersweetness.
Things were not different. Their story came to an early and sad end. He’d moved away to follow his dreams and had married Hillary, had a family.
He was no longer hers.
