He was terrified.
I reached up and stroked my fingers along his fuzzy, bearded jawline, and he turned to me. In a heartbeat, he leaned in and slipped his free hand into my hair, and his mouth tenderly moved over mine in a sweet but heart-melting kiss. When he pulled away, he gazed into my eyes and a crease appeared in his brow.
‘Thank you for coming with me. I don’t think I could’ve faced it alone.’
I shook my head. ‘You’re going to be great.’
‘But what if they realise I’m not actually that good, Star?’
Smiling warmly, I cupped his face. ‘Fin, I believe in you and so do they. You are amazing. Please try to accept that.’ Without speaking, he gave me a tight-lipped smile and pulled me possessively into his side.
I suddenly realised he and I had one very big thing in common. Neither of us truly believed in ourselves or our talent. The things he had said to me about my photography were exactly how I felt about his singing. It was like kismet. Even after such a short time, we each saw the best in one other. The realisation made my eyes sting a little. I was meant to meet this guy. At that moment, sitting there in the cab, I knew this for a fact. Regardless of my previous thoughts on such things, this felt like fate.
The rehearsal studio was like something from a movie set. I observed as the guys sitting in a circle, jamming. Fin’s voice had its usual effect on me, and my body prickled with goosebumps. Every so often, he glanced over and winked at me. I decided that the photos I was going to take would only be taken when he wasn’t aware—when he was lost in the music.
To say this was Mr Hyde’s first practice with their new vocalist, things were going remarkably well, and the more I listened, the more impressed I became. My new shy, unassuming and kind of emotional man had found his Eden. There in the studio where he could just be ruled by the music, he let go and gave it his all.
As it was their first rehearsal, they stuck to covers they all knew and loved, and hearing the familiar songs delivered so emphatically by Fin made my heart soar. Nate began to play the intro to ‘Need Your Love so Bad’ by Peter Green’s Fleetwood Mac on his guitar, and Fin closed his eyes. The softness of his voice took me by surprise as he began to sing lyrics that clearly resonated deep within him. They spoke of needing to feel loved.
The honesty of the lyrics was disarming, and my heart fluttered as I listened. He had been let down by those closest to him, people he had trusted, including his fiancée, and so there was no wonder he was reluctant to expose his heart again, but at the same time, he was saying he wanted to try. He showed a level of vulnerability in his deliverance of the song that made my eyes sting.
He opened his eyes and stared straight at me. Into me. Without thinking, I lifted the camera and began to shoot. I threw my original decision to only take incidental photos out of the window. I was mesmerised. Hypnotised by the emotions in his vivid blue eyes.
I was lost.
Captivated.
* * *
Once the rehearsal was done, Fin made his way over to me where I sat perched on a stool in the corner. The shy smile on his face was enough to make me spontaneously combust, and I shivered as he ran his hands up my bare arms and rested them on my shoulders.
He leaned in and placed a kiss on my forehead. ‘So? What did you think?’
Think? Oh, hell no. I’m actually supposed to respond with something intelligent. How can I when I’ve turned to a gelatinous pile of mush? Come on, Star! Put brain into gear.
I gazed up into those pools of blue and finally found some words. ‘You were amazing. You just... you gel. As a band, I mean. It... it justworks.’ My excitement grew as I enthused about the rehearsal. Every word filled with honesty. ‘You’re just so natural, Fin. You werebornto be on stage with that voice. And those guys, wow. It all sounded phenomenal.’
His shy smile widened and became a full blown grin. ‘You really think it was that good? Or are you just biased?’ He narrowed his eyes at me and tilted his head to one side.
‘God, no. I mean, yes. Yes, I’m biased in a way, I guess. But honestly, you have such an effect on me when you sing.’
‘Oh yeah?’ He stepped closer and I widened my knees to allow him to slip his arms round me and rest his forehead on mine. ‘What effect do I have on you?’
I glanced in the direction of the rest of the band and they were making kissy faces like dumb teenage boys.
I rolled my eyes and then focused my attention on Fin once again. ‘Um, judging by what the guys are doing right now, I’m guessing this is not the place to have this conversation.’
Fin turned round and the rest of the band began whistling and pretending to pack up their gear. I couldn’t help laughing at their feigned occupation. They were a great bunch of guys and, oh boy, were they talented. But they were typicalguyswhen all was said and done.
Fin turned back to me, shook his head, and kissed my cheek before whispering, ‘Hold that thought, Miss Mendoza. You can show me later what I do to you. Come on, let’s go. The sooner we get back to my place...’ He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth and grinned. He took my hand and pulled me down from my seat and then led me out the door.
28
Fin
As Star and I walked out of the rehearsal studio, I was buzzing. It was the best high I’d had that didn’t involve alcohol or sex. The cab ride over had been terrifying. I had felt nauseated and light-headed, but Star had calmed me simply by being there. Something about her grounded me. Even though she had considered us opposites to begin with, I now knew we had more in common than either of us first realised. Yes, there was an obvious and undeniable attraction, but there was so much more.
When I’d initially walked into the rehearsal studio, I’d immediately felt intimidated. Strange, considering I could stand up in a courtroom and defend someone with utmost confidence and come across as a very together, even arrogant, guy. But being there with the band wasnothing like I expected. I was thinking church hall, pub function room. A professional rehearsal studio in a converted warehouse wasnotsomething I’d anticipated. Stupid really, when I knew the guys were adults and not some teenage wannabes being let out for a couple of hours by their parents. I really needed to increase my expectations.
