“It’s beautiful,” I breathe out, barely managing to get the words out as love and lust threaten to strangle me. I’ve loved this man all my life, and maybe if I stopped running from one thing to the next long enough to realize it, I could’ve saved us a whole world of heartbreak. I make the effort to stop that thought in its tracks, knowing Talia would redirect me. I can’t change the past, and it wasn’t our time.Until now.
“Youare beautiful. This,” he says, motioning to the tattoo, “is just a little something to carry me through the dark days. Now that you’re here, those are few and far between.”
Tears prick the corners of my eyes as I peer up at him. “Are you sure about that? Because it sure feels like I’ve been bringing a whole lot of darkness to your life,” I tell him, anger, resentment, heartache, and regret twisting inside me as I mentally recount the recent events that landed us here tonight.
He gathers my hands in his, kissing my knuckles. “Lola Lima, you arethemost precious gift I’ve ever received, and every day spent with you has been brighter than the last. Some days have their challenges, but there is no one I’d rather have by my side for as long as the moon dances in the sky thanyou.”
My heart bursts wide at the seams, overflowing into my chest, making it hard to breathe. Relief floods me, as does fear. “But…” He wipes an errant tear from my cheek, dragging me against his body and pressing a kiss to the top of my head.
“But what, darlin’?”
“Thismarriage wasn’t supposed to be real, Ry.”
He chuckles deeply, the sound vibrating into my stomach, releasing a horde of butterfly wings. He tips my chin up, forcing me to meet his eyes. “Lola, I’ve never loved anyone more than I love you. I might have tried to convince myself I was marrying you for any reason besides that, but the truth is it’s always been you, always will be. I don’t want there to be an end date to our marriage, and I’d hoped couples counseling had shown you that, but since you need the reassurance, understandably so, I’m here to give it to you as long and as often as you need.”
He presses a kiss to the tip of my nose and settles his forehead against mine. “I don’twantyou to leave me, notever. This is real for me, darlin’, and I want to show you that every single day.” He bends further, caressing my lips with a gentle kiss that has those butterfly wings brushing the sides of my tummy. His words calm the restlessness that’s been swirling inside me these last couple of months, and I know there isn’t anyone I’d rather do life with than him.
“I love you, Ryder Maddox Lockhart. We have a lot to talk about, things we need to work out, obstacles to overcome, but every day from here on out, I’m choosingyou.”
“Nowthatis the dirty talk of my dreams. God, baby, words of affirmation just do it for me,” he says, light laughter bubbling between us. “And I love you too, more than you know. I’m about to try and show you,” he says, smirking as he tosses me on my back and ducks his head, nipping the skin at the base of my throat. All the tension is suddenly replaced with a newfound wave of lust and desire.
He grips the base of his dick, pressing the tip against my clit. I grind against him, groaning from the sparks zipping up my spine. “Do we need a condom?” he asks.
“I tested negative after the girls rescued me,” I tell him. “And I have an implant, so I’m okay to go without if you are.”
“I’m also STI-free and haven’t been with anyone in years, even since before the divorce.”
My eyes widen, unable to stop them as I stare at him in disbelief. “Excuse me,what?”
“Don’t act so shocked, Lola. The woman was emotionally abusing me. It’s difficult to get in the mood when you’re constantly under fire like that. I have no regrets about the way things have turned out. In every lifetime, it was always you, Lols.”
“Ry, you weremarriedto her. Jesus, no wonder she hates me!” I tell him, but I’m only half joking. Mostly, I’m thrilled he’s saved so much of himself for me, even if that wasn’t necessarily the intent. I wish I’d done the same; instead, it feels like I sold pieces of my soul to the devil in the hopes he’d prove me wrong and show me he wasn’t exactly what I’d thought he was: a monster.
I push the unwanted thoughts from my mind as Ryder clasps my jaw in his warm grip, dragging my eyes up to his. “No one else matters here, darlin’. It’s you and me. Okay?” I nod, and he gives me a lopsided grin as reward for my stellar behavior. “Good. Now, eyes on me, darlin’, because I’m about to fill you until there’s no question about who you belong to. Be a doll and grab onto the headboard.”
“Yes, sir,” I agree, reaching behind me to grip the wooden slats, laughter spilling past my lips. It dies in my throat as Ryder dips his head, pressing a searing kiss to my mouth, now swollen from his kisses. His tongue tangles with mine, and I release a rough moan. He notches himself into me, sliding his engorged tip through my slickness, my thighs clenching around his hips from how damn good it feels.
“I have never seen or known anyone more beautiful, inside and out, than you, Lola,” he tells me, his tone reverent. When he says things like this, they dig themselves deeply into the very depths of my soul. With Ryder,I believe him.I believe him like I’ve never trusted another man in my entire life, and instead of terrifying me,it thrills me.
“How about you slide on inside and find outjusthow true that is,” I say, the joke falling flat as he does exactly as I say.
We both groan loudly, my head falling against the pillows as he stretches me, a delicious touch of pain mingling with pleasure. Heat coils in my center as he edges back out, only to drive his hips further, deepening the stretch.
His mouth finds the sensitive bud of my nipples, sucking and tugging on them. When he slips a calloused hand between us, pressing down firmly on my clit, I almost combust. There are so many sensations swirling inside me, I’m overwhelmed with pleasure, and it’s an intoxicating feeling.
“I want all of you, Ry. Give me every inch,” I beg, aching for release.
His resolve snaps, a hungry growl ripping from his chest as he ravishes my body, pounding into me. The headboard bangs violently against the wall, matching the rhythm of my rampant heartbeat.
“You can have anything you want, darlin’. I’ll. Give. You. Everything.” He punctuates each word with arduous thrusts that have me barreling toward my release. He praises me, pushing me over the edge.
My walls clench around his thick length, heat licks up my spine, and my limbs tingle as I lose myself in the feeling of Ryder Lockhart fucking me into our marital bed.
I release the headboard, twining my fingers in his hair and dragging his mouth to mine as he finishes inside me with a loud moan I’m locking away in my spank bank.Thank God for cowboys.
“So good, so perfect,” he whispers over and over, resting his sweaty forehead against mine as we relax into the bed together.
“It was about time we consummated our marriage, huh?”
