Her hands were in the air, she was gesticulating wildly, and when she finally got to the punch line, because with Nora there was always a punch line, everybody started laughing hysterically.
That felt normal.
Stepping up close enough so I could be heard, but not yet entering the circle of people around the fire, I asked into her ear, “What’s so funny?”
Immediately, her head whipped around as she recognized my voice.
That’s right. It’s me. And it’s been two and a half years since you saw me. And who’s fault is that?
I expected joy. I expected her eyes to light up. And for a second…maybe a second, that was there, in the flicker of the yellow flames. But then it was gone and a polite mask fell over her face.
“Oh. Hi, Nick. Merry Christmas,” she said, then turned her head back to the group. “Okay, well that’s my story. I’m going to go back inside and warm up.”
She turned away from everyone as if she was going to leave. As if all I was going to get was a fuckingHi, Nick. Merry Christmas.
Oh no, definitely not.
“Hey,” I said and reached for her wrist. My fingers circling it to stop her in her tracks.
I didn’t know what to say. My breath was caught in my chest. It had been so long and I wanted, no needed, to reset us. Fix us. Put us back the way we were. Like how we always had been.
“No hello hug?”
“Oh. Yeah. Sure.” She leaned in, her hands on my upper arms. Maybe her cheek brushed mine and then she was pulling away again.
“It’s been…a while.”
Fuck, was that awkward? I didn’t want this to be awkward, but it was already.
“Yeah,” she said a little breathlessly. Then she tucked her dark hair behind both ears, something she did when she was nervous and it made me feel a little better. “You’ve been good?”
I nodded. “Garage is always busy.”
She nodded. “Dad won’t let go of his truck. I think partly to make sure you always have a customer.”
I laughed. Say something. Say anything remotely not awful. “School going good?”
She nodded. “I’m spending next year abroad.”
“What?” Abroad sounded far away. Very far away.
“France,” she said. “First semester I’m staying with a family in the north. Then the second semester in the south. Wine country, actually. I’m super excited. I’m nearly fluent now, but that will really be tested when I’m living there.”
Right. She’d majored in English but had a minor in French.
“So you’re just going to be in a foreign country. Alone. And Roy’s okay with this?”
Her lips twitched in a way that I knew my tone had annoyed her. “I’m not going to be alone. I’m going to be staying with a family. Taking classes. It’s still college, it’s just college in France.”
“France,” I repeated, like the word was a curse.
“Why do you care where I go anyway?”
“Don’t,” I said. Maybe a little too firmly.
I glanced around and saw that folks had wandered back inside. The cold brisk air cut through my button down and jeans, but I didn’t feel it. Nora was wearing a coat, but I could still see that her nose was red. I pulled her back closer to the fire.
“Don’t pretend I wouldn’t give a fuck about you moving off to France for a fucking year,” I growled. “What’s that movie? The one where the girl gets kidnapped?”
