We’re close now, the heat of his thighs reaching my own. And in this moment, the shit we’ve been going through doesn’t seem all that insurmountable. Is it truly possible for us to put aside our past and move forward? Could we be more than just half friends? Fucking hell. I’m a mess. I don’t even know what Raphael, Theo, and I are, and here I am trying to complicate things even further.
Mom’s voice echoes down from the foot of the stairs. “Cookies are ready! I’ve left the baby book for now, so you’re safe to come up.”
“Coming!” I yell back before turning to Zeke. “Are you sure you’re okay with this? I’d understand if you’re not. You didn’t exactly sign up to play boyfriend.”
He leans forward, dropping a soft kiss to my forehead, and I wonder if maybe he won’t respond at all. But when he does, I almost wish he hadn’t. “That’s where you’re wrong, hummingbird. I chose you first, but you chose them.”
His voice is calm as he speaks, as if he’s dropping facts from a history book instead of trying to carve my heart up, but it does all the same. I want to ask him about it, dive deep into whatever drives him to believe that I chose anyone at all in the beginning. There’s no choice to make if he takes himself out of the running.
A little voice in the back of my head whispers,Silly little girl. He’s right, you know? You did choose. Raphael and Theo shared you in that prayer tent. Remiel saw your choice.And while that might be true, it doesn’t explain the month’s worth of Zeke’s hatred.
We don’t have time to discuss it, heading up instead to sit with my parents. We play the dating couple well while Mom and Dad grill Zeke about his life. I listen on as he tells them about his internship at the Guild, finding myself wholly fascinated and realizing that there’s so much I don’t know about him.
“Your parents must be so proud of everything you accomplished,” Mom says brightly.
In a move so slight I don’t think my parents have noticed, Zeke flinches. “Thank you. My dad is, and I’d like to think my mom would be too. She died when I was young, so it’s just been Dad and me.”
He tries to hide it, but pain seeps from his words in such a rush that Mom is out of her seat and pulling Zeke into a hug.
“I didn’t know her, but I can tell you that a parent’s love is unstoppable, even in death. Don’t forget that.”
“I won’t,” Zeke replies, his usually husky voice turned soft, belying the emotions he’s trying to hide.
This angel is like a foreign species, with so many facets to him I wonder if I ever really knew him at all. Some of my anger falls away. We’re all dealing with something. Whether it’s the loss of a parent, the death of a dream, or something else entirely. And maybe we shouldn’t be judging one another without all the facts. Resolve settles in my gut. Zeke and I are going to talk. We’ll get to the bottom of whatever this is between us once and for all, and as scared as I am for that conversation, there’s a part of me that yearns for it, too.
“We should probably get going,” I say, remembering our purpose.
“Oh?” Dad asks, eyeing us suspiciously. “Have a hot date or something?”
I roll my eyes, laughing. “So what if we did, huh?”
“Well, I’d tell you to stay out of trouble and remind you that you’re too young to have kids.”
“Archangels’ blessings, you did not just say that.” Heat rises to my cheeks as I tug Zeke toward the front door.
“Have fun!” Mom calls out through a giggle.
Mortification keeps me silent as we take the same path to the shops I took last night. Zeke is quiet too, and part of me wants to know why. Is he as embarrassed as I am? Does he regret coming here at all, despite his sweet words in my room? Fuck, he’s probably upset about his mom. I want to ask him about it, plunge into his brain and learn all I can about him and the things he’s gone through, but I don’t know that he’d let me.
If nothing else comes from this, I pray to the Archangels that we’ll at least find answers and make this whole awkward situation worth it.
We finally reach the street with all the shops, and I pull Zeke into the café. He follows along willingly, if not a bit preoccupied, and I wonder if maybe he’s having the same thoughts I did when I first stumbled upon this street. Why do the Fallen have their own shopping district, and what does it mean for the future?
I drop my bag on the seat, waiting for him to get seated before I ask, “Chocolate or vanilla?”
He barely takes a second to think about it before he replies, “Both.”
A smile curves my lips as I walk up to the register, but something zips over my flesh before I get there. A strange man sits at a table in the corner opposite ours. His clothes look worn and filthy, his fingers stained with color, and he’s watching me.
My heart thrashes as I order the café’s signature drink: a caffeinated milkshake. The barista throws me a weird look when I ask for half vanilla ice cream and half chocolate, but I don’t really care. Angels have been throwing me weird looks for as long as I can remember, and rarely ever about my order preferences.
I snag two straws and head back to Zeke with the large drink in hand, doing my best to ignore the man still watching me.
“I ordered it just like before, babe,” I say to Zeke, hoping he’ll understand the look in my eyes. “Happy anniversary!”
He stops me from sitting in the seat beside him and tugs me into his lap instead. “This is the only seat you ever need, hummingbird.” His lips tip up devilishly as he adds, “Well, I can think of one other place I wouldn’t mind you sitting.”
Panty. Melting.
