But then I sentenced your uncle and his family to death.
But then I broke my godfather’s heart.
“Why are you here?” It wasn’t what I meant to say, but it fell out and I couldn’t take it back.
“What do you mean?”
“There are any number of people who could be here right now, who could have brought me back and watched over me. But…you’re here. And they’re not.”
“They’re not,” he agreed. “I was worried. About you, yes,” he added before I could pry for clarification. “And no, I don’t know why. I don’t know why I notice the way you eat or the colors of the ribbons in your hair. I don’t know why my eyes search for you at every function and why my heart feels lighter once you’re found. But they do and I do and, Hazel, I…it was frightening to watch you faint this afternoon, to see you so vulnerable and helpless. Especially when I know that you help everyone around you. And so…so I wanted to be the one to help you.” He let out a rushed breath. “And it felt good to do that. And I want to go on feeling good.Especially today. Especially after Papa…” He swallowed. “There’s so much of my life Ihaven’tfelt good about, that Idon’tfeel good about. But none of that seems important when I’m helping you.”
His honesty undid me, erasing any breezy comment I might make to defuse the rising tension. It felt as though every molecule of air was stacked around us, building an impenetrable wall, trapping us in too tight a space, in too close a confine.
“I don’t…I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable,” hecontinued. “I just…you’re the only one in the world I feel like I can share my honest thoughts with. But perhaps I was too brash in speaking them all.”
Before I could think better of it, before reason could dissuade me, I leaned forward and kissed him.
My daring caught us both by surprise. A startled noise choked deep in Leopold’s throat, but I couldn’t retreat and apologize—again—because his hands were suddenly tangled in my hair, bringing me closer. He held me with remarkable tenderness, cupping the curve of my face like a long-treasured prize, a thing hoped for and happily gained. I let out a sigh as his lips left mine, pressing themselves to my forehead and eyelids, my temples, even the tip of my nose.
“You’ve no idea how much I adore these freckles,” he murmured, whispering his words across their scattered dots, his voice warm and low and so full of desire.
There are so many temptations to lure a young man off his path, don’t you agree?
Marnaigne’s voice echoed through my mind, but I pushed it back into the dark recesses with a reckless shove, longing to forget both the king and whatever plan he had for the boy I was kissing.
With brazen fingers, I ran my hands up Leopold’s chest, feeling his heart race beneath the fine wool uniform, under the medals and insignia, and then grabbed hold of his collar and pulled him back to me.
With a dark chuckle, he moved his mouth over mine. I answered with unchecked hunger, opening my lips so that I could taste him.
“Hazel,” he whispered around kisses.
I didn’t respond but shifted positions, tracing my lips along the sharp curve of his jaw, pressing a reverent kiss on the small scar justbelow his earlobe, before working my way down the length of his throat. I smiled as I felt him swallow.
Kissing Kieron had never felt like this.
Kieron had been sweet and light. His kisses promised we’d have a lifetime together. They were fervent but gentle. Respectful.
I didn’t want Leopold’s respect. I didn’t want him promising our lives entwined.
That was impossible.
But I also wanted more of his mouth against mine. More of those little strangled noises rising from deep in his chest. I wanted to push him back onto the bed and crawl on top of him until he somehow stopped this aching need blossoming in my middle.
I couldn’t have a lifetime, but I could have this moment.
I wanted his now.
“Hazel,” he repeated once more, firmly this time, cupping my jaw and holding me back so that our eyes met. “I’m delighted by this turn of events, truly I am.”
“But?” I asked, and the flames flickering in me dampened, leaving me cored and hollow.
“You’ve had a hard day. You need rest,” he added quickly, talking over the protest rising in me. “Especially if…”
“If?”
“If you obstinately plan on attending the masquerade tonight. I don’t want my dance partner swooning in the middle of the farandole.” Leopold leaned in, touching his forehead to mine as he whispered, “Of course, if she did, I’d have to carry her back to her rooms to make sure she got a proper night’s sleep.”
His lips roamed over mine once more, with a maddening softness that made my toes curl.
