We don’t need to speak—our argument is already loud enough between us. I can feel it, the silent screaming. Me, begging her not do this. Her, insisting there’s no other way. As strong as I am, she won’t risk my life to traverse the gates to the Beyond.
Another moment stretches in silence, the rustling of leaves above and the soft rush of the creeks around us all too loud in the stillness.
“I’ll be right back.” She offers me a smile after finishing her statement. There isn’t any doubt in her tone. Nothing that makes me think she doesn’t believe that.
On her birthday, I had thought I’d be no more than an hour. Then, shewas gone from my life.
This isn’t her going to the fucking store.
This isn’t me going to pick up Sydni.
This ishergoing to theBeyond.
“Little demon, the answer is no.”
“I wasn’t asking…” she whispers. “Stand still, Kai.”
A tension builds in my knees and they lock up, my sense of control dwindling from my brain. Each muscle fighting for the need to move even just to defy the order, not merely to rush to her and grab on like my life depends on it.
“Don’t you dare,” I growl. “Xera.”
“Arms to your side,” she commands as she steps to me. “I’m sorry, but you can’t come.”
My fingers tremble as I try and move my body. To force this hold she has on me to break so I can take her into my arms before bending her over my knee to punish her for controlling me.
“Don’t you understand…” she continues softly. “You can’t, it isn’t that I don’t want?—”
“If there is even a chance I’d survive?—”
“Kai—”
“I’m going to take it. Let me go, Xera! Right now!” I seethe. She’s using her abilities on me outside of sex and Ido notlike it.
“Please, K?—”
“So help me, I’ll?—”
“You aren’t listening to me!” She steps into my space. “Kai?—”
“Why won’t you let me try?!”
“It’s because I fucking love you, godsdamn it!”
Her words knock the wind out of me, and I have to blink a few times to confirm I’m not unconscious. I need to make sure I didn’t just dream that she said what I think she did.
“Don’t you see… it’s because I love you that you can’t come. I’d suffer a million deaths to ensure I have you to come home to.” She steps to me, her head resting against my chest and her arms circling my waist. “Let me have more time with you, please…”
Heat builds across my temples, my eyes stinging.
“Hold me.” It’s a command, and as my arms fall limp I grab onto her tightly. How had such an incredible past few days turned into me having to let her go?
“I love you.” A shattered breath escapes her as I finally say it for her to hear. Although I’ve said it a few times, they were at points when she wouldn’t register or overhear. “Don’t go, please, Xera.” When I squeeze her tighter,she rubs her face against my chest. “He’ll have to come to us.”
“Then what…” She lifts her head, bringing me into view. “Risk him getting his hands on Sydni? On you?”
My swallow is rough, because I just can’t consume what she is saying.
“I don’t regret killing them.” She rests her chin on my chest and smirks. I hate that she’s smiling right now. “I’d do it all again. Especially the aftershock?—”
