Chapter Twenty
KENZIE
I'mtired of people knocking on my door.
I look like shit, and I feel worse, but I force myself off the couch to answer the incessant pounding. If it's some salesperson, they're going to get an earful. If it's someone I know, they're probably going to have to deal with me sobbing all over them like a baby.
I pull open the door, not bothering to paste on a fake smile. It wouldn’t fool anyone.
Bo stands at my doorstep, damn near vibrating with energy.
Of fucking course it's Bo. I contemplate slamming the door closed in his beautiful fucking face for a second, but he lurches forward and pulls me into a hug before I can go through with it.
“Kenzie, thank fuck,” he says into my hair. “God, it's good to see you.”
My brain short circuits at the scent of his cologne and the feeling of his muscles arms around me. Before I know it, he kicks the door closed behind him and squeezes me so tight I can hardly breathe.
“It's okay,” he says with a relieved laugh. “I figured out a way to fix everything. All of this is going to be over with before we even know it.”
He sounds so relieved, and he's rocking me back and forth as he hugs me. My brain feels like it's in hyper-drive, so many thoughts bouncing around in my skull at once.
I need to take a step back.
Or ten.
“Wait, Bo, hold on.”
He stumbles a bit when I push him back, and I resist the urge to whine at the loss of his touch. My whole body feels like it's burning, shame and anger and hope and relief all swirling together in an absolute mess in my heart. Bo looks confused, glancing between my eyes and my still outstretched hands that keep him at arm’s length.
“Kenzie?”
“Just… fuck, just wait a second.” I can't find any words to say through the whirlwind of emotions in my brain. It takes me a long several seconds of standing there with my eyes closed and focusing on my breathing to calm myself down enough to speak. “What do you mean about fixing everything?”
Those warm brown eyes light up again, excitement sparking on his features. He steps toward me again, but I take a step back into the living room, needing the space to keep a clear head.
He falters, pausing for a second, but barrels in anyway.
“Oakley showed Mom that video,” he says, sounding thrilled. “From the rodeo, I mean. Mom and Dad are trying to figure out how to get proof that Savannah isn't pregnant!”
“Okay?”
I draw the word out slowly, happy to hear the news, but confused by… well, everything. If they can clear that mess up, it means that the family won't be under so much stress, but it doesn't fix the root of the problem between us.
“Kenzie, we can be together again!” he says, and my heart shatters. “I can finally fight for what I want, and all I want is you.”
The realization that Bostilldoesn't understand crashes over me like an ice cold tsunami, and a broken laugh tears from my lungs. Does he really think it’s that easy? That as long as the bottom line is met, it doesn’t matter what it takes to get there? Does he not realize how much he’s torn my heart to shreds?
“No one's telling you not to, so you can stand up for yourself now?” My words are harsh, and my tone is so acidic that I almost don't recognize it as my voice. I've been through hell over this and to see him still so blithe and carefree about it makes my guts twist in pained fury.
“I—what?” He laughs awkwardly, stepping forward and grabbing my hands. “Kenz, did you hear me? I'm working on fixing this. For us.”
“Your momis working on fixing it,” I correct him, yanking my hands away. “Me and Oakley and Maggie and your mother are finding solutions.You'resitting back and doing what you're told, just like always.”
He blinks at me in shock, a flicker of hurt flashing in his eyes, but I can't stop now that I've started. I turn my back on him and pace, throwing my hands into the air as I talk to stop myself from screaming in frustration.
“You didn't even try to stand up for yourself! As soon as your dad told you what he expected of you, you folded. Ibeggedyou to fight for me, and you said that you loved me, and then you fuckingleft!”
Bo looks on in horror as I rant and rave, my words sinking in deeper than he's ever understood me before.
