“Fuck off, Jett,” I call out for good measure, and he laughs behind me before closing the door. At least he’s a good sport about getting rejected. I’m not kidding around, though. I’m not in the mood. Because I don’t want anything distracting me from the verbal lashing I’m about to give Hudson.
This is so like him, too. And sure, I don’t have any real loyalty to Emma—we haven’t even spoken since the public forum—but like hell am I going to let Hudson continue behaving in a way that disregards women’s feelings.
I make the walk over to Heartwood’s only gym, and it gives me enough time to rehearse what I want to say, starting withHow dare you. When I enter the building, the air conditioning hits me like a wave, but so does the stench of sweat and old gym socks.
My stomach lurches, my breakfast wrap threatening to come up on me. Weights clang and treadmills whirr as I walk into the gym. There are enough people in here for me to make a real scene if I want to. I take a few steady breaths to settle my nerves, which also helps to quell the nausea.
Hudson is bench pressing what looks to be double my body weight when I spot him.
For a moment, my mind falters, and the speech Ipracticed doesn’t come. Because Hudson’s body, and the memory of being pressed up against it last night, is consuming my thoughts. The firmness of his pecks, the heaviness of his arm draped over my shoulders. The other … firmness that pressed up against my ass this morning before he took off. Hudson’s body is different than I remember. He’s less lanky, awkward teenager, and all hard, rippled, solidman.
Get a fucking grip.I square my shoulders, stride over to the bench he’s occupying, and stand right at his head, crossing my arms with one hip popped.
My shadow looming over him grabs his attention and he nearly drops the weight on himself, catching it at the last moment. It would serve him right. He places the bar on the rack with a clang and sits up to face me.
“Did you get my tex?—”
“Yes, I fucking saw your text,” I snap. “And then you know who else I saw this morning? Take a wild guess, asshole.”
A look of shock washes over Hudson’s expression. He looks stricken, like the wordassholephysically pains him. When Hudson doesn’t answer, still baffled I’ve caught him playing two girls at once, I continue.
“What were you thinking?” The question is rhetorical, because the obvious answer is that he wasn’t. “Betting me you’ll take me out on a date, spending the night with me when you’re seeing someone else?”
Hudson’s mouth opens and closes without saying any words as turns on the bench to face me. Caught red-handed.
“This is so like you. You haven’t learned. You still haven’t grown up. Still don’t consider how your actions areimpacting someone else.” Once again, I’ve been fooled by his charming, cool demeanour, and it makes me see red.
“I told you. You don’t have to worry about Emma.” His tone has shifted into something less defensive. Now it almost sounds … hurt. A sharp pain radiates in my sternum watching my words hit him somewhere deep. Somewhere we’ve both been before, that I’ve attacked before.
“What does that even mean?” I snarl. A few other people in the gym cast glances in our direction, so I lower my voice to a hiss. “I don’t have toworryabout Emma? What about her? Should she be worried?”
Hudson stands now, putting his hands up in the air in a display of innocence, or like someone who is about to sayDon’t shoot.
“No. Emma ended it with me. We’re just friends.”
Oh.
Oh.
I school my facial features, trying to maintain a neutral expression even while my face heats with shame. I may have jumped to conclusions, made an unfair assumption. Still, I don’t want to let this new information ruffle me. Or at least, I don’t want to let him see that it does.
Emma dumped him. I turn it over in my mind, inspecting it from every angle. What it could mean. When? And why? And then the other question that brings up a new wave of nausea. Does Hudson still want to be with her?
It wasn’t his choice. He broke up with me like it was easy. But Emma … that wasn’t his doing.
Whatever this is, whatever last night was, it was a mistake. As Poppy said, I let myself fall into old patterns. And it’s apattern I’ve lived before, I know how it ends. With me hurt, feeling like I’m not good enough. Being left in the dust.
“Well, regardless, the bet is off. We’re not going on a date.” This was exactly what I was hoping to avoid coming back to Heartwood. We’re still opponents, still on rival teams. We still have to get through the vote, and now I’m going full steam ahead. I turn on my heel and head towards the door.
A strong, rough hand grips my wrist as I leave, and tugs, whirling me around. My breath catches in my throat as I come face to face with Hudson, his blue eyes watery, almost sad. Pleading. I can’t help but let my gaze drop to his lips, the lips I practically begged to kiss last night so I could feel them again. He has a hint of stubble on his jaw, having not been home for over twenty-four hours. In an instant, his stubble is grazing my cheek, and his lips meet mine, firm and passionate.
He takes an inhale of breath as his mouth presses against mine, sucking the air straight from my lungs. The room around us spins as his tongue finds my lips and parts them. It slips across my bottom lip, and then it’s gone, and he pulls away. Two seconds of pleasure that makes my legs feel weak. I graze my fingertips over my mouth, as if making sure I wasn’t imagining it. That it was real. That Hudsonkissedme.
“I’m sorry,” he starts, his voice trailing off as he runs his hand through his hair. “That’s not how I wanted to …”
“Don’t,” I say. I want to say more. Don’t be sorry, don’t take it back, don’t feel bad. Because the feeling of Hudson’s lips on mine … I can’t believe I went ten whole years without it. Hudson looks back up at me now, sincerity lining his face.
“The only reason Emma ended things with me, and not the other way around, is because she got to it first. It wasn’t going to work with her and I. Emma is great, but I knew she would always be my second choice.” Hudson either hasn’t noticed the crowd staring at us now, or he doesn’t care, because his piercing blue eyes are glued to me. The way he’s said those words,second choice, makes it sound as if I would be his first.
