Whatever conversation I just tuned out, it ends with Lo glowering at Garrison. I have to fix this.
“It’s only been a week,” I explain quickly. “I know it’s not a long time, but I really didn’t want to sneak around, especially since I live with some of you.”
Garrison watches me, still by my side. We feel like a team.
“We have rules,” Lo starts.
“Have fun,” Lily declares, her smile overwhelming. My lips start to lift.
“No, not have fun—what the hell, Lily?” Lo gawks at his wife.
“They’re eighteen.”
“Yeah, we’re eighteen,” Garrison echoes.
Lo glares. “Last I remember, you’re still in high school.” That’s a low blow. I wince.
Garrison sighs heavily. “You’re not her fucking father.” This is true, and also a good point. I’ve tried hard not to burden Lo. I’m just his little sister.
“You’re right,” Lo says, “I’m her brother and thefirstperson she should trust while she’s in Philadelphia.” He takes a step closer to Garrison. “She’s my responsibility, and while I trust you with a lot of things, I don’t want you upstairs in her room past two a.m.—and two a.m. is more than I’d give any kid of mine.” Another step. “And keep the door open.”
Surprisingly, I relax at his words. Maybe Lo knows I’d want the rules.
Garrison said he’d be patient and wait for kissing and sex, but I’m more worried about me. That maybe I won’t be able to saynowhen he asks me if I’m ready when I’m not. That things will go too fast and I won’t knowhowto slow down. Everything is new for me.
The rules will help give me an excuse to stop things before I’m ready to move forward. I can blame curfew or my overprotective brother. It makes it easier to saynowithout feeling guilty about it.
I want this relationship to go at my pace. A slow pace. Even if it’s a turtle crawl.
Me staying quiet is putting strain in the air. Both LoandRyke look five-seconds away from pushing Garrison out the door.
Before I can say anything, Garrison slowly unlaces his fingers from mine. My stomach drops, but he gives me this reassuring nod. “I’ll text you, okay?”
I nod back. “Will you check my gifs before you go to bed? I want to post them, but I think one isn’t working.”
Garrison nearly smiles. “Yeah. I’ll do it first thing.” He acknowledges the rest of the room with a curt wave and then heads out the door.
“When? Where? How?” Lily blurts out.
Her excitement fuels my smile, and I feel my shoulder dropping in ease. “So you’re all not upset?” I linger on Lo.
“You can do better,” he tells me.
Daisy steps forward. “She knows Garrison in a way that none of us do, so we should really trust her instincts.”I love Daisy Calloway. I’ve never felt what it’s like to have a friend so unwaveringly in my corner until her. We exchange smiles.
“You know what I don’t trust?” Lo says. “An eighteen-year-old horny motherfucking guy’s instincts.”
“Same,” Ryke adds.
“That’s why there are rules, right?” I say. “So nothing should go wrong?” I hang onto this. Or else their apprehension will start to seep into me. I’m heading into uncharted territories here, and I know I’ll turn to people more experienced than me for advice. I just don’t want their advice to make memorenervous.
Who am I kidding? Garrison Abbey, the practical reincarnation ofJessfromGilmore Girls, is my first boyfriend.
Repeat that a hundred times and maybe it’ll seem true.
He is so out of my league.
Yeah…
