‘Acceptance Of Life/Love Fate-Amor Fati’
Amaya
After spending some time amongst the dead, I finally forced myself to go back to the castle. I stood staring at Lady Samara’s painting when Jerry appeared and asked how the council went. After explaining their boring demands and Rí’s dramatic leave, Jerry's eye twitched in sync with his moustache. I dragged my tired body to the bedroom, and I found myself curling up on the love seat opposite the huge windows.
The clouds had darkened, and the waves below crashed with so much force against the cliff I was surprised that the castle hadn't even shook from its force. The wind had picked up, and rain had started to splat against the windows before coming down in a heavydownpour. It matched my sour mood. I had been so excitable seeing Rí shift, seeing his glorious dragon take to the sky and stretch his wings.It had produced a feeling in my chest I couldn’t quite place.
I was tired, so very tired of the pull of life. I was actually jealous of the dead and their permanent resting place.
The constant demands of the people who didn't even know me was exhausting. This feeling brewing inside reminded me of the day I met the boys, the pull I had felt with those little pills in my hand. I couldn't allow this feeling to fester. I wasn’t allowed to feel this way. I wanted my twins so badly my chesthurt.
Their little faces always made everything worthwhile. Their big blue eyes and silent little mannerisms. Their little hands holding mine, knowing I was there to keep them safe. To protect them.
And then I was gone, leaving them alone and afraid. Confused and hungry. How could I sit here and enjoy this warmth, this comfort when I knew how bad they had it?
I needed to find this magic within me. I needed to pull it forward and keep it there. I needed to find a way back to them and I needed to find a way for them to live here.
Jerry busied himself behind me, setting up a bird perch just as Ravioli flew through the open bedroom door. He landed on the perch and turned his beady little eyes to me.Rain drops glistened on his deep black feathers.
How had he known where I was? And also, how did Jerry know I now had a pet bird?
“How–” I began
“I know all that happens on the mountain my Lady”
Huh, the man really was the best damn ghost butler uh...assistant.
“Why can't humans live here?” I asked quietly, never removing my eyes from the raindrops sliding down the windowpane.
He glided over and poked at the crackling fire before saying, “The amount of power in the portals, the sheer pressure would crush anyone without any kind of magic in their veins.”
Gliding over to me, he gently placed a blanket around my shoulders, making me jump and stare up at his jiggling moustache in shock.
“However, if someone who had this immense power in their veins could somehow transfer even a drop of magic to the humans...well...I suppose that would save them my Lady.”
I frowned at him as my mind raced. I could transfer magic to people. Was that the answer?
To do this I was going to need to get a hold of this power and use it to my will. I was going to need serious control. But first, I had to find a way back. I needed to return to the Dead village.
My eyelids drooped as I asked Jerry one final question, “What was my mother’s name?”
“Her name was Isa my Lady.”
Isa...
I jolted awake and looked around me in confusion. The dark clouded sky was now pitch black and the rain had stopped. I sat up and rubbed the sleep from my eyes.
“Mo Chridhe, did ye’ sleep well?” Rí asked, he sat in a large armchair beside the fire. Jerry must have givenhim a bigger seat. I held in my snicker at the thought of him squeezing into the small chairs.
Yawning, I walked over and sat in the chair opposite him and scratched at Ravioli's head as he perched on the arm of my chair.
“How long have I been asleep for?”
“Ye’ was snoring when I got back from my flight.”
I sat up straight and said “Your dragon! He was huge!” Then added less enthusiastically “And I don't snore.”
“Ah well thank ye’ Mate,” he leered.
