Miss Fairley smiled in understanding.
“I feel the same. We are all connected, all supporting each other through what are very difficult circumstances. No doubt more young ladies will join us, and we will be able to offer the same support to them. How unfair it is that society treats us so! We ought to be able to go about in society just as they do, given that none of what has been placed upon us is our own doing!”
“That is true,” Rachael murmured, wondering how one would go about such a thing. “Thetonseems to believe that, even though I was clearly not with child, there is still some great shame attached to me. Some believe that I was sent away from Lord Blackmore’s house in those early hours, that even though I was not with child, I was still in his company for that particular length of time which is quite ridiculous. Others, I think, simply believe that there is a stain upon me, though they are not quite certain what that particular stain is.”
“And Lord Blackmore did not seem to have anywhere near the same burden to carry,” Lady Frederica added, making Rachael wince. “He was still able to go about amongst theton,able to stand up and dance at any ball he wished.”
“Yes, he was.” The unfairness of it all bit hard and Rachael scowled. “I do not know why such a thing should be. My own father has identified the very same but though we have pondered it, there seems to be nothing we can do. I–”
Her words were cut short as her eyes went to the very gentleman she had been speaking of. None other than Lord Blackmore himself strolled through the ballroom, walking alongside another gentleman, and with such a look of calmness on his face, Rachael wanted to scream. There was a lightness in his step, a steadiness to his expression, and a glint in his eye that spoke of contentment, of happiness and joy – and anger began to burn in the pit of her stomach.
Why was it that thetoncould be so forgiving ofthisgentleman? A man who, though he had been proven not to have done anything wrong as regarded her, was still whispered about - buthewas not pushed to the back of society, was not ignored and looked down upon. Was it because of his title? Because of his social standing? Or simply because he was a gentleman and she, a lady?
Her eyes closed tightly to shut out the sight, her hands curling up into tight fists, her fingernails biting into her skin.
“You have seen Lord Blackmore.”
“I have.” Opening her eyes, Rachael looked to Miss Fairley. “Why is it that he does not suffer in the same way as I do? Why is it that society deems him to be just as he was before? Why do they welcome him but shun me?”
“I do not know.” Miss Fairley shook her head, her eyes glistening with a hint of tears. “It is the same no matter who or where we are. It seems that the gentlemen of thetonare giventhe freedom to do whatever they wish and will be, on the whole, welcomed back to society without so much as a raised eyebrow!”
“They even tolerate rogues and scoundrels,” Lady Frederica sighed, “so long as they are handsome and with a good fortune. We, unfortunately, are not so fortunate.”
“Indeed.” Rachael turned her attention back towards Lord Blackmore, watching him laugh at something his friend had said and finding her own heart twisting with sudden resentment. Why should he continue just as usual while she was forced to linger in the shadows?
Before she could even think about what she was doing, Rachael began to make her way forward, her steps quick and hurried. She saw the very moment that Lord Blackmore set his eyes on her, for he not only came to something of a stop, but his eyes flared wide and the smile which had been on his lips began to fade.
“Good evening, Lord Blackmore.”
Rachael swallowed quickly as she curtsied, not at all certain why she had stopped the gentleman, or what it was she wanted to say to him. Her feet had taken her out here and had guided her out into his path, and now that they were facing each other, she was going to have to find something to say. Something more than just a mere greeting.
“It is Miss Simmons, is it not?” Lord Blackmore cleared his throat and then gestured to his companion. “This is Lord Elmsford, my very good friend. Lord Elmsford, this is Miss Simmons.”
The way in which the gentleman’s eyes flashed with interest told Rachael that he already knew precisely who she was.
“Good evening, Miss Simmons. I am glad to make your acquaintance.”
She managed a smile.
“Of course.” Turning her attention back to Lord Blackmore, Rachael lifted her chin. “Lord Blackmore, might I ask what it is you intend to do about this situation?”
“Do?” The gentleman blinked and then glanced at his friend. “There is nothing which concerns me at present, Miss Simmons. I am doing my best to quash the rumors which still roll around society and thus far, I believe I am doing quite well.”
Rachael frowned, her eyes settling on him, taking in every part of his expression, trying to read a little more in his face than he was giving away. Lord Blackmore was not unhandsome, with dark green eyes which, at present, were looking back at her with hints of confusion swirling through them. Light brown hair swept neatly across his forehead, his firm jaw and Roman nose giving him a particularly distinguished air. His expression, however, was rather vacant as though he truly did not understand in the least what she was talking about. When he looked back at her, his eyes searching hers, Rachael found a slight heat begin to rise in her core, though she put it down to the frustration and irritation which was beginning to form.
“You speak of squashing these rumors, Lord Blackmore?” Her eyebrow lifted. “What rumors is it that you speak of, might I ask? There have been a few of late and I should like to be quite certain that we are both speaking of the same ones.”
Lord Blackmore frowned.
“Why, the ones which are circulating at present, Miss Simmons.”
“Which are?”
The irritation grew all the more quickly as the gentleman sighed, clearly now a little frustrated that she was continuing to press him.
“The ones which suggest that I did something disreputable last Season,” he told her, looking to Lord Elmsford who nodded fervently as if to confirm this was all quite true “The ones whichstate that the reason I was not in London was because of my guilt, because Ididhave something to hide. None of that is true, of course, and thus I am returned to town to make certain that these rumors are quashed. Thankfully, I believe the rumor about our supposed betrothal is mostly vanquished.”
Rachael’s shoulders dropped.
