“You are not paying the least bit of attention! Instead, you are much too inclined towards staring! Though quite what you are staring at, I cannot imagine!”
Joy tilted her head but did not take her eyes away from what she had been looking at.
“I was wondering whether that lady there – the one with the rather ornate hairstyle – found it difficult to wear such a thing without difficulty or pain.” The lady in question had what appeared to be a bird’s nest of some description, adorned with feathers and lace, planted on one side of her head, with her hair going through it as though it were a part of the creation. There was also a bird sitting on the edge of the nest, though to Joy’s eyes, it looked rather monstrous and not at all as it ought. “Surely it must be stuck to her head in some way.” She could not keep a giggle back when the lady curtsied and then rose, only for her magnificent headpiece to wobble terribly. “Oh dear, perhaps it is not as well secured as it ought to be!”
“Will you stop speaking so loudly?”
The hiss from Lady Halifax had Joy’s attention snapping back to her mother, a slight flush touching the edge of her cheeks as she realized that one or two of the other ladies near them were glancing in her direction. She had spoken a little too loudly for both her own good and her mother’s liking.
“My apologies, Mama.”
“I should think so!” Lady Halifax grabbed Joy’s arm in a somewhat tight grip and then began to walk in the opposite direction of that taken by the lady with the magnificent hair. “Pray do not embarrass both me and yourself, with your hasty tongue!”
“I do not mean to,” Joy muttered, allowing her mother to take her in whatever direction she wished. “I simply speak as I think.”
“A trait I ought to have worked out of you by now, but instead, it seems determined to cling to you!” With a sigh, Lady Halifax shook her head. “Now look, do you see there?”
Coming to a hasty stop, Joy looked across the room, following the direction of her mother’s gaze. “What is it that you wish me to look at, Mama?”
“Those young ladies there,” came the reply. “Do you see them? They stand clustered together, hidden in the shadows of the ballroom. Even their own mothers or sponsors have given up on them!”
A frown tugged at Joy’s forehead.
“I do not know what you are speaking of Mama.”
“The wallflowers!” Lady Halifax turned sharply to Joy, her eyes flashing. “Do you not see them? They stand there, doing nothing other than adorning the wall. They are passed over constantly, ignored by the gentlemen of theton,who care very little for their company.”
“Then that is the fault of the gentlemen of theton,” Joy answered, a little upset by her mother’s remarks. “I do not think it is right to blame the young ladies for such a thing.”
Lady Halifax groaned aloud, closing her eyes.
“Why do you willfully misunderstand? They are not wallflowers by choice, but because they are deemed as unsuitable for marriage, for one reason or another.”
“Which, again, might not be their own doing.”
“Perhaps, but all the same,” Lady Halifax continued, sounding more exasperated than ever, “I have shown you these young ladies as a warning.”
Joy’s eyebrows shot towards her hairline.
“A warning?”
“Yes, that you will yourself become one such young lady if you do not begin to behave yourself and act as you ought.” Moving so that she faced Joy directly, Lady Halifax narrowed her eyes a little. “You will find yourself standing there with them, doing nothing other than watching the gentlemen of London take variousotheryoung ladies out to dance, rather than showing any genuine interest in you. Would that not be painful? Would that not trouble you?”
The answer her mother wished her to give was evident to Joy, but she could not bring herself to say it. It was not that she wanted to cause her mother any pain, but that she could not permit herself to be false, not even if it would bring her a little comfort.
“It might,” she admitted, eventually, as Lady Halifax let out another stifled groan, clearly exasperated. “But as I have said before, Mama, I do not wish to be courted by a gentleman who is unaware of my true nature. I do not see why I should hide myself away, simply so that I can please a suitor. If such a thing were to happen, if I were to be willing to act in that way, it would not make for a happy arrangement. Sooner or later, my realself would return to the fore, and then what would my husband do? It is not as though he could step back from our marriage. Therefore, I would be condemning both him and myself, to a life of misery. I do not think that would be at all agreeable.”
“That is where you are wrong.” Lady Halifax lifted her chin, though she looked straight ahead. “To be wed is the most satisfactory situation one can find oneself in, regardless of the circumstances. It is not as though you will spend a great deal of time with your husband so, therefore, you will never need to reveal your ‘true nature’, as you put it.”
The more her mother talked, the more Joy found herself growing almost despondent, such was the picture Lady Halifax was painting of what would be waiting for her. She understood that yes, she was here to find a suitable match, but to then remove to her husband’s estate, where she would spend most of her days alone and only be in her husband’s company whenever he desired it, did not seem to Joy to be a very pleasant circumstance. That would be very dull indeed, would it not? Her existence would become small, insignificant, and utterly banal, and that was certainlynotthe future Joy wanted for herself.
“Now, do lift your head up, stand tall, and smile,” came the command. “We must go and speak to Lord Falconer and Lord Dartford at once.”
Joy hid her sigh by lowering her head, her eyes squeezing closed for a few moments. There was no time to protest, however, no time to explain to her mother that what had just been discussed had settled Joy’s mind against such things as this, for Lady Halifax once more marched Joy across the room and, before she knew it, introduced Joy to the two gentlemen whom she had pointed out, as well as to one Lady Dartford, who was Lord Dartford’s mother.
“Good evening.” Joy rose from her curtsey and tried to smile, though her smile was a little lackluster. “How very glad I am to make your acquaintance.”
“Said quite perfectly.” Lord Dartford chuckled, his dark eyes sweeping across her features, then dropping down to her frame as Joy blushed furiously. “So, you are next in line to try your hand at the marriage mart?”
