Miss Millington did not immediately answer, her lips pursing as though she were deliberately choosing her words in her mind before speaking them aloud – and Adam grew a little anxious. Perhaps he ought not to have asked. It was only when she smiled and shook her head that he let out a slow breath, relieved that she was not about to berate him for such a question.
“Some time ago, there was a letter sent in response to another written in ‘The London Ledger’.” Suddenly she would not look at him and Adam caught himself frowning. “I know of what was contained within – and it was a harsh opinion against the urge to find a match which isnotone of practicality or suitability.”
Adam swallowed hard, aware that she was speaking of the letter which he himself had sent. Had one of her friends written the letter in the first place? Or had news of it simply traveled around society?
“How do you know of it?”
“My friends and I discuss many things, Lord Seaton.” Finally, she glanced up at him, then looked away again. “I tell you this because my father is very much inclined to the same thinking as the author of that letter. He thinks only of practicality, rather than anything else. I amnota lady so inclined towards that, as I have said. I do not care about the connection one family will have to the next, nor do I care about whether my father thinks a gentleman wealthy enough. Those are not, to my mind, the things which might provide the grounding for a happy marriage.”
Beginning to understand, Adam frowned and slowed their steps a little.
“What then is it that you do care about?”
“A gentleman’s character.” Miss Millington offered him a gentle smile, which he accepted with a clear understanding now flowing through his mind. “If a gentleman is cruel, then what good is a high title? If he cares only for himself, then what good is all the wealth he possesses? And if he has a dark temper, then what good is his well-connected family?” Her voice grew quiet as she spoke, her eyes looking away from him now. “What good is it to me if the gentleman I wed cares nothing for me?”
A little surprised, Adam turned and looked at her, coming to a stop.
“I am sure that most gentlemen come to care for the lady they wed.”
“But in that regard, there is a chance that I might marry someone who wouldnevercome to have even the least bit of affection for me - and I do not want that.”
Adam swallowed.
“You are seeking a love match.”
His heart sank just a little as he looked into her face again and saw how her eyes warmed with a fervency that had not been there before. From what the lady had said, she wanted a love match – something he was quite set against, at least since his painful experience with Lady Margaret. And yet, he enjoyed Miss Millington’s company immensely, found her delightful in conversation and, when at a ball, was always eager to have her dance with him. Why was it that her view on this particular matter caused his mind to turn over with uncertainty, his skin prickling as he looked down at her again?
“Yes, that is so.”
“Then indeed, Miss Millington, I would advise you to put such thoughts from your mind. These things, I think, very rarely come to be. It is best to consider that someone your father offers you for practicality will not bring you the same difficulties that asupposedlove match would! No, put such thoughts from your mind and consider sensibly, Miss Millington. You do not want to become a spinster, I am sure!” The same sentiments he had written in his letter came back to him in his words but, as he spoke, the smile vanished from Miss Millington’s expression, and she looked away sharply. “I do not mean to speak harshly, but only to be as pragmatic as I think one ought to be.”
Miss Millington’s face went white.
“I think I should rather become a spinster than marry without love.”
Her words were now a little sharp, her eyes flashing at him as she tugged her hand from his arm. With a lift of her chin, she held his gaze firmly and Adam’s stomach dropped. He had never seen her in such a way as this before, suddenly appearing almost regal as though he ought to bow down before her and beg for her forgiveness.
I have spoken rashly. I have hurt her heart.
“I think I should like to return to my mother” Her lips pinched as she looked away. “I shall return at this very moment.”
Adam swallowed hard, realizing now that Miss Millington no longer wished to be in his company.
“Miss Millington, I did not mean –”
“It is quite all right.” Her tight smile was not enough to convince him. “It seems that you and I hold a very different opinion, and that is to be expected. I would not think that every gentleman in London would agree with me.” Her eyes were shards of glass. “Thank you for our walk and conversation, Lord Seaton. Good afternoon.”
There was nothing he could say to keep her by him, not even for a few moments more. He bade her farewell in a low voice and then watched her walk away, leaving behind a great chasm between them, one he did not think he would ever be able to close.
Chapter Thirteen
Oh. This is something of a surprise.
“Might I offer you my hearty congratulations.”
Lady Winterbrook sent an arched eyebrow towards Constance, who thankfully, due to the occasion was well able to smile, although she had to admit silently that she was also quite relieved. Lady Winterbrook, upon finding her at the ball this evening, had begged Constance to permit her to make the introductions to one Lord Rowney, the fourth gentleman who had written in response to Constance’s letter and thus, it had been done. The gentleman was very handsome, just as Lady Yardley had stated, but was also very firmly betrothed.
“Indeed.” Constance managed to add in. “How wonderful.”
