Maybe some people just didn’t get to have the fairy-tale ending.
Whatever choice I didn’t make would rip out a piece of my heart—and I would just have to learn to live with that.
CHAPTER 14
AVRIL
Going backto the app after flirting with David felt like admitting defeat—but it had to be done. I half-heartedly flipped through the pictures of my matches. Once again I had to scroll past what felt like over a hundred alphas to even get to someone who had a beta designation. Then once I had found a beta, I had to sort of squint at the picture of the guy, and figure out what was wrong with him. If he didn’t have any obvious red flags in his profile, then what was he hiding?
I listlessly scrolled, on autopilot, until I landed on a profile that achieved the impossible—a beta on a dating site who was actually hot. I mean he wasn’t half as hot as David, but he was the most attractive beta I had seen on the app so far. I sighed deeply. Maybe even a week or two ago I would have been thrilled to find a beta this attractive… but after flirting with David, all of this just felt like going through the motions. But it didn’t make sense to dwell on somebody I could never have. I was just setting myself up for heartbreak. I clicked on the hot beta’s profile and swiped right.
Back in The Thirsty Pearl, the vibe immediately felt different. Not that it was bad, just different. Like if I were eating myfavorite brand of cereal and it was made with raspberries instead of blueberries somehow. I seated myself at my favorite table, hoping that things wouldn’t be awkward between David and me.
“Hi!” A chipper voice that I didnotrecognize, said. “My name is Mateo, and I’ll be your server today.”
I sort of leaned back, staring over his shoulder, as if there was some kind of mistake and if I looked hard enough, David would materialize and take my order, like usual. “Is David sick or something?”
“You mean Mr. Brockman? He isn’t in today.”
Okay, weird.
Since I’d started going on all of my dates, David had always been there, ready with a smile and my favorite drink in hand. Equally ready with a scowl, at whatever shenanigans my latest date had pulled.
“Can I just get a grapefruit vodka?” I muttered to Mateo.
What if I had missed my chance? What if David was ready to go on the relationship market when we’d last spoken and I had missed my chance and he was off on a date with some omega who would sweep him off his feet with her perfumey delicious floral scent, and he would totally fall in love with her. Then they would do all the heaty, rutty things that alphas and omegas got up to behind closed doors.
Hey, now.
Did it even matter if David wasn’t here?He wasn’t mine.And the sooner I got that through my thick skull, the better. It wasn’t good for me to be pining after a man I could never have anyway. David… he was so dreamy, and wonderful.
He deserved all the love in the world… even if it couldn’t be with me.
If he wanted an amazing omega who smelled phenomenal… like… I don’t know, red velvet cake batter with sprinkles and a cherry on top, then good for him.
I was getting really good at this anxiety-spiraling shit, even where there was no evidence that anything bad was going down. But all of the excitement of the night had faded the moment I realized that David wasn’t going to be here. Who would be there to raise his eyebrows at the ridiculous craziness my next date would pull?
“Hey there, Beautiful,” a deep voice cooed at me.
My eyes snapped up to the guy who had approached my table.
Oh, right.
I was here on a date. Still on a mission to find a new guy for my wedding.
Shit, what was his name?
“I’m Tony. Chatted you up on the dating app last night.” Tony wore a red silk shirt, open to the collar, allowing a peek at curls of dark chest hair.
Cool. I’d just been staring at him like he was some kind of exhibit at the zoo. So far, things were going great. Good thing that he reminded me of his name. I’d gone through so many dates at this point that all the guys were just sort of blending together.
I did have to remind myself to actually start paying attention to the guy’s names. When I manage to find my better half, things would get awkward real soon when I asked them to remind me of their name during the wedding, right in the middle of the vows or something.
Tony sat down, letting his gaze flicker warmly up and down my body.
Which was totally hot when David did it.
When Tony looked at me like I was an exquisite meal that he wanted to devour, it just reminded me I hadn’t eaten dinner yet and had me wondering if there was anything new on the menu.
