“What else does it feel?”
“Like a decision that’s mine to make, and something that no longer feels impossible like it once did.”
“Let me help you make it more possible. It’s something you’ve deserved to have all this time. I want to show you.” I also want to leave a trail of us behind, hoping she can tell we were there, that I had him in the bed where she’ll never have a chance to again. It’s crazy, possessive, and a little fucked up, but I don’t think she’s been as innocent as she’s pretended to be either. She has dirty secrets of her own that will come out soon enough, and she keeps trying to trap him in a place he no longer wants to be.
I want to say he belongs with me, but as much as half of my heart is screaming for him to be, the other is not sure it’s the right time. It’s too soon for many reasons. It’s really important for him to be on his own for a little while and to not feel like he needs to depend on another person all the time. I also need to not depend on whatever this is to keep me from forgetting about all the pain I’ve been pretending I no longer have when he’s here.
We both have a lot to figure out and work on, but right now I need him to be mine.
“Okay,” he finally says, backing up toward the stairs. “Show me.”
Pressing my mouth to his, I guide him up the stairs, nearly tripping us several times before we finally reach the top. We’re both in a fit of laughter as we stumble into the room, tearing off one another’s clothes. Panting and making our way to the bed, our mouths don’t separate for long. His tongue is ferocious and dominating as he pushes me back on the bed, falling on top of me, his cock brushing hard over mine.
His warm body presses harder to mine, his hips grinding and tip leaking. I slide a hand down his back, grazing his hips with the other before rubbing a finger between his cheeks. I don’t know what will happen tomorrow or the next day. I don’t know if we’ll ever be more than two people needing a distraction, orsomeone for the other to lean on during the hard days, but he’s making it so damn hard for me to continue questioning anything. Especially when our colliding bodies, shared breaths, and limbs intertwining feel like fucking everything.
Twenty-four
Silas
“Remember how much you loved riding my fingers in the lake parking lot?” Elijah breathes against my lips.
“Yeah,” I say against his open mouth, my tongue darting halfway inside.
“Remind me how you did it that night.” He reaches between us, stroking one of my hard nipples.
Moaning, I arch my back and reach under the mattress for lube. The bottle I’ve always kept there hasn’t been moved. Stacey never knew about it and had no reason to look under the mattress. After slicking us both up, I slide up his body enough for my ass to line up perfectly with his cock when I push myself into a seating position. Breathing raggedly, I straddle his hips and push myself all the way down until I’m bottoming out.
My walls stretch around him and I feel like I’m being split in two, still not fully used to his size. Eager to get there, I wiggle my hips and then lift myself up all the way before slamming my bodyback down. My thighs quiver and high-pitched sounds crawl up my throat, a delicious zapping sensation scattering inside me. Everything’s so sensitive and wonderful. When Elijah arches his hips, meeting my thrusts, my legs lock up and I struggle to remember how to move my body.
“Look at you. So beautiful. You’re flying, aren’t you, baby? So high above me. You love having something to rub that pretty hole on, don’t you?”
His words take me closer to the edge and I’m like a fiend, needing more as I slowly roll my body forward, feeling him everywhere inside me with every ache we create together.
“Yeah, you do. It’s so needy and hungry for attention. It deserves it too. Being deprived for too long. All of you has been. This too, huh, baby?” He rolls my bouncing cock between his large fingers and I give all the control over to him, only taking what he gives me.
Oh, and he gives me so much too, with the strong force of his hips and steady stroking fingers, his palm creating tiny sparks over my sensitized skin.
“Feel good? I love making you feel good.”
His fat head hits my sweet spot the faster he fucks me, his hand slowing down on my cock as he shakes with me.
“You make me feel good too,” he continues. “You’re the perfect good to go with my bad. Just perfect all the way around.”
“I’m not going to last long.”
“Then don’t, Sunshine. You better hurry if you don’t want her to catch us. She could walk through that door at any moment and see what I’m doing to you.”
Tightening my muscles, I hold back my orgasm, not wanting to come too fast after all. Wanting to feel the weight of his words, the fear from the risk we’re taking pumping adrenaline into my veins. I don’t want her to catch us but I entertain the idea anyway, fueling it. Heat pools in my stomach and my balls cryout, needing release. I clench around his cock as it pumps in and out of me, slowly hacking away at my self control.
“You want your wife to see her husband riding her boss’s cock? To see you coming from someone else other than her?”
I nod my head and then shake it, not knowing what I want anymore. I don’t really want that. I can’t want that. Seeing us together would hurt her but it’ll also make it more real for us all. No more pretending everything’s okay and fixable—or like we can go back to how we were. The truth would be out in the open, where she’d have to face it instead of running from it. She’ll see me and Elijah in her head instead of me and her.
Why does this all feel more important to me than sparing my wife hurt and pain? Maybe because I’m done with being stuck and tired of her not wanting to hear me. And maybe also because an alarm lights up inside me when I think about her, warning me about a side of her her absence has been preventing me from seeing. Almost as if my heart knows something I don’t.
Elijah’s filthy sounds bring my attention back to him and the magic sparking between our clashing bodies.
“That’s what she’d walk in on,” he says. “Me fucking you and you loving it. Those smiles and pretty sounds are all for me. Not her. Only for me.”
