Luciana,
Obviously, you need a reminder of who you are and the world you are choosing to go into. To be able to do that, you need to know more about who I am.
I was born into that world, my papa and nonno were both guards for the Leone family. I was brand new when I was assigned to Stella. I knew this was a test to see how I would do in comparison to the other Bonacci men. Like I’ve said before, once I laid eyes on Stella I knew instantly that I could not let her become another woman in this world. I risked everything, including my life to get Stella out andknew I had to do the same for you. I won’t pretend to be neutral about how ungrateful you’ve been for choosing to go back into his world. As a woman, you will be used then pushed aside when you’re done producing heirs for him, held legally to a man who will be unfaithful and trap you. That’s why Elio deserved you.
Elio would have loved you fiercely and given you everything you need, everything I’ve given your nonna. I’m disgusted that you chose that man. I can only hope that one day when you realize this your nonna and mamma will be willing to pick up the pieces because I’m not sure I can. Not again.
Regardless of your choices, I will love you always,
Nonno
Chapter 69
Luci
21 Weeks Pregnant
By the end of Nonno’s letter, my body shakes as I sob, heartbroken by the words I’ve read.
Nonna has always been the sweet one. She’s the type of person everyone needs in their life and the one I’ve always turned to when I needed support without judgment. Her letter broke my heart the most because of her kind words. There’s no yelling, no judgment, no cruelness, and no ‘I’m disappointed in you,’ but she said what she needed to say. I know instantly I will fight to see her so she can meet my daughter, regardless if it’s only her.
I expected Mamma’s letter to be frank, but I was surprised by how she expressed herself. Part of it makes me think I failedher by not showing her how amazing she is. How amazing she’s always been. Even though I never had a papa, my mamma has always been enough, regardless of things that have happened between us. It hurts me that she believes Alessandro will intentionally harm me. If she truly believes I would purposefully let a man hurt me, then I haven’t done my job as a daughter proving to her how great of a mamma she is.
Nonno’s letter is exactly what I expected from him. His hatred for the Leone family bleeds through his words. I wish I knew everything about his past and what led to this moment beyond Nonna’s engagement to Geno. Until then, I’ll take the bits and pieces he gives me, and fill the gaps where I can. I don’t want this letter he wrote out of anger to be his last words to me. If there’s anything I know about him, he is honest, no matter how brutal it may be.
The door scans to unlock and I assume it’s Alessandro or maybe El to check on me. To my surprise, it’s Geno who walks in, letting the door lock softly behind him. The conversations we’ve had privately have been few and far between and the ones we’ve had were uncomfortable.
“Um . . . Hi.”
“Hello, Luciana. I’m sure you’re wondering why Alessandro isn’t up here.” That’s saying it lightly. “I thought since everything that’s happened is because of my family I need to be the one to come up. Can I come sit?”
“Okay.” I have to be in the twilight zone. Alessandro told me about this sweet side of Geno. He sits next to me on the bed, a red journal in his hands as his dominating energy fills the silent room.
“Do you know why I came in here?”
“To ask me about the letters?”
“I would be lying if I said I wasn’t curious, but I came in here for you, to check on you. I will stand by my family and ourbusiness, but I know this contract has damaged things between you and your family. I’m sure you have questions for me.” Oh boy, do I. “This is your time to ask them.”
“Why my nonna? Why couldn’t you let this go? You married another woman and had your son. Why didn’t you go on some crazy search for Salvatore to marry a Miani woman?” Geno nods his head, stoically contemplating the questions and how he’s going to answer them.
“Good questions. Stella is an attractive woman, especially when she was young. It was me who mentioned having her as my wife instead of her family paying back the money. After the contract was signed, she came to live with my family to protect her before the wedding could happen, how ironic. I’ve known Aldo since we were children since his papa worked with my papa. He was always around and I thought I could trust him to guard her. I understand why he fell in love with Stella. What I cannot imagine is how he’s been able to not only run off with her but manage to break into this home and run off with you. After she left, we went back to Stella’s family and were able to . . . inspire her family to pay us back. That’s where the addition came into the contract that a descendant of Stella Miani would marry a descendant of mine. I couldn’t let this go because this is my family’s business. This is what my family has made their life on and if I let it go, it would show weakness. Leones are not weak. I will admit, I’m happy I ended up marrying my wife. In a similar situation, her family owed my family and we came to an agreement. You will understand one day being at Alessandro’s side, that business is business and our values cannot be pushed aside for anyone.” Geno pauses, collecting himself before he talks about his son. “Things with Salvatore are difficult. He brought home Gia when he was in high school and it was obvious they were meant to be. Because of that, I approved their marriage when they were eighteen, disregarding the Mianidebt. After Gia died a year later, it was time for him to search for a woman to pay off your family’s debt. Instead, he took the coward’s route and ran away.” Geno glances down at the letters I’m holding in my hands before his eyes close into slits and he asks what I thought he would this whole time. “Can I see them?”
Call it mother’s intuition, but something about Geno convinces me that he wouldn’t freak out, unlike how Alessandro would, and pass them over. I contain my laughter at Geno’s expression while reading the letters because of how similar he and Alessandro look. After he reads them, the silence speaks when he rests his hands on his knees, taking in what he read.
“It’s nice to see Stella hasn’t changed, and neither has Aldo. She’s as sweet as she’s always been and it’s obvious she loves you very much. Aldo though. He’s a Mafia man through and through, regardless if he will admit it or not. He’s tough, brutal even, but that’s what makes him who he is. I wouldn’t let Alessandro read Aldo’s letter. Neither of us wants to see his little boy fit he would throw. What I find interesting is Caterina’s letter. Do you understand her letter? Not what she said, but what she meant.”
I didn’t put much thought into it. She normally doesn’t express herself this way. I assumed she had time to think before writing. “She’s never been this expressive, but I know the last few months have been stressful for everyone.”
“Si, it has. Caterina is showing a lot of vulnerability in this letter. Her words show she’s a tough woman, but she’s insecure, especially when it comes to you. Do you see that?” His words cut deep as I grab Mamma’s letter, looking at her words and realizing he’s right. Her letter has nothing to do with what she says, and everything to do with what she means.
“I didn’t think of it that way. I always assumed she was tough on me because she and Nonno have similar personalities. They’ll never admit it though.”
“I can tell. What I also see is that she’s disappointed in herself that she raised you without your papa, unlike her. Since then, she’s tried to do everything she can to make you better than how she perceives herself.”
“I. Oh.” I’m speechless. Mamma? Insecure? No way.
“I won’t keep you from your family and I won’t let Alessandro keep you from your family because they’re the most important thing in life. Don’t be surprised if Alessandro practically handcuffs the two of you together during any visits with your family. Also, I will not deal with any disrespect from them in regards to myself and my family. This includes you, my great-granddaughter you’re carrying, and any other children you and Alessandro have. On an unrelated note, I want to give you this.” He hands me the journal he brought in and I notice it says Gia on the cover. Is it Alessandro’s mamma’s journal? Geno keeps going before I can ask. “I found this among Salvatore’s things after he left. I’ve never opened it because it’s not my place to read it. I’ve been waiting over twenty years for the perfect time to give this to Alessandro. I’ve come to the realization that you, as his wife, should be the one to make that decision.”
