It was his wife.
Nancy was still dressed in what she had worn to the ball as well. Still looking like a dream.
Richard cleared his throat, forcing his gaze to stay on her face—not like that was doing much to alleviate the growing pressure in his stomach.
“Did you need something—” he began to ask but her voice overtook him.
“I want to ask you a question, Richard,” she said simply, her expression telling him there was likely more to this mysterious query.
He indulged her anyway. “All right. I am all ears, ask away.”
Nancy inhaled, looking as though she was rethinking her decisions. But when he expected her to change her mind, she spoke up.
“Did I smell unpleasant earlier?”
That… was not what Richard had expected.
“I beg your pardon?” he queried back in confusion.
“Did I smell or look unpleasant at the ball earlier?” she asked in the same stern tone.
“No,” Richard hedged, unconsciously stepping closer to her. “No, Nancy. That’s—that’s ridiculous. You looked beautiful. Very much so, in fact. You were… easily the most beautiful person in that room tonight.”
He had said too much, perhaps. But he could not bring himself to care. Not when his wife harbored such unnecessary thoughts about herself.
He had hoped that this would placate her, but she looked even more upset, lifting her head higher as she brought forth another concern.
“If that is true, why did you avoid me all night?”
Richard stilled, caught completely off-guard.
He had hoped she wouldn’t notice—which, now that he thought about it, was a very foolish hope. It did not surprise him that she knew because he had deliberately stayed out of her way the entire night.
Richard had crossed paths with many people he disliked purely by coincidence—at least thrice. However, he had been so attuned to Nancy’s presence that he knew to turn right when she was approaching from the left.
“That is not true. There were a lot of people present tonight. It’s normal that we couldn’t cross paths as often as you might have liked. And I did seek you out later on. We danced.”
“Once!” she snapped. “After which you let go of me and walked away as though you were at risk of catching the plague if you stayed close any longer. One dance means nothing if you refuse to look at me duringandafter it. Your cold and stiff attitude towards me is only feeding the rumors about the legitimacy of our marriage.”
“Now you are purposefully being ridiculous. I am not the reason those gossip mongers wish to speak about our business. I told you, when we got married, to set aside all your expectations. I am sorry that you are finding it hard to leave behind your lofty ideals of marriage. I apologize for the fact that you were given no other choice than to marry someone who would not meet your standards. But I can’t be the husband you want,” he told her coldly.
“Can’t or won’t?” she challenged. “Because it seems that you are able to do anything and everything else—talk to any woman other than me as well—but meet me halfway, at least. Would it be so bad to just try and be more to each other than beneficial partners? All the time, I try to speak with you, but you continually keep me at arm’s length.”
“I never asked you to do any of that. Perhaps it would be better if you stopped assuming to understand what it is I need,” he countered coldly.
“This marriage isn’t just about you, Richard! I cannot claim to be the center of it because you barely even give me the time of day. And no matter how much you try to convince me, I am well aware of how lonely you are in truth. You want more than this, but for some reason, you would rather choke on your own tongue than admit it.”
Nancy inhaled shakily, lowering her head slightly as she continued, this time in a quieter tone.
“Did that time in your study even mean anything to you? Or am I just another conquest for you to add to your collection?”
For some reason, that upset him the most. Richard knew his youth’s rakish ways would haunt him and his marriage, but the thought of her viewing herself as any other woman he would have approached for a night of enjoyment and nothing more hurt.
“You are wrong. Nancy, I have never once thought of you that way,” he told her calmly.
“So… why?” she asked, exasperated, seemingly losing her will to argue. “Why do you avoid me so much if that is the case? Would it be the worst thing… for us to be together?”
Richard rubbed a hand over his face as his frustration melted away, leaving nothing but cold disappointment in himself.
