“Thanks for letting me join you. I’ve lived here for three months but still feel like a newbie. I didn’t know anyone when I moved here, so it’s been tough trying to find friends.” I totally don’t feel like an asshole for not wanting him to join us. Can’t he find someone else’s friends?
The conversation flows easily as everyone laughs and jokes around the table. The awkwardness fades after a few minutes,and I try to focus on my food and Colt. I slide a hand onto his thigh. His body is tight, and I feel the stress pouring off him. We didn’t have good luck with dates outside the house. Maybe Colt had a point with his whole, stay home and have sex thing.
“What do you think?” Colt bumps his shoulder against mine.
I shove a few french fries in my mouth to avoid answering right away. I’ve been so lost in my thoughts that I forgot to listen to the conversations. “Mmm...” I say around the food and give Colt a needy look.
“What do you think about spending a little longer here and then going to Matthias’s house? He wants to show off his new home theater setup.”
“It’s not showing off. I just don’t want to spend the night watching movies alone.”
“Sounds nice.” This outing is not what I planned, but a change of scenery and a little break will do us well.
The conversation wanes, and we get up from the table. As the other guys start down one of the aisles of the market, Colt holds me back. “Talk to me.”
“About what?” I sound like a petulant teenager.
“I can tell you’re upset. We can skip going to Matthias’s house if you want and go back to my place. Or your place. Just please talk to me.” Worry creases his eyes. I really am an asshole.
“I’m sorry.” I’m the one who insisted on this get-together, and now I’m fucking the whole thing up. “I’m just jealous.”
“Jealous? Of what? I was on a date with Oliver for less than an hour. Other than that, we exchanged a handful of text messages. All before you and I kissed. There’s nothing to be jealous of. You can read the messages.” He pulls his phone from his pocket and opens it up. I push his hand down and pull him into my arms for a hug. It only takes a second for him to soften into me.
“I don’t need to read them. I trust you. I always have.” I kiss his cheek before I pull back. “What do you want to do?”
“Well, honestly, my answer is to go back to one of our houses and lock the door, but as the new boyfriend, I think the correct answer to the question is to go hang out with the guys for a while to prove I’m not an asshole who keeps you from them.”
“Boyfriend?” I can’t hide my smile as I say the word.
“Was that not obvious?” It probably is, but sometimes it takes me a little while to pull my head out of my ass and work things out. Maybe it isn’t worth writing off this wholedoing-thingsstuff just yet.
Chapter Twenty
NATHAN
Matthias only livesa few blocks from the market, so we leave my car in the parking lot and walk over to his place. It’s better than dealing with the crazy traffic right now. We’ll come back when the market’s over and the area is less hectic. I’d gotten so caught up in my shit that I didn’t think about how hard it must be for Colt spending an entire day with my friends. They could be a bit much if you weren’t used to their antics, and time in Matthias’s backyard always included a lot of antics.
We end up at his place a lot, too, at least once the weather is nice. Matthias always had the best stuff, too—like the new home theater. A bunch of single guys need somewhere besides the bar to hang out. Except, now I had a boyfriend. The word still brought an inner giddiness bubbling up.
“We can still bail if you want.” I squeeze his hand and move a little closer.
“Absolutely not.” He pauses. “Unless you want to.”
I laugh. “I think we’re both having trouble making sense of today. How about we cut the crap and say what we’re thinking?”He nods. “I’ll go first. I like being out with you and my friends. It’s like having these two big parts of my life fit together. It’s still a little weird. I haven’t brought a boyfriend around them like this before, so I think they’re a little cautious, too. Having Oliver around doesn’t help, but he should also make friends, which has nothing to do with us.” The silence between us lingers for a few steps. “Okay, your turn.”
“Okay, I know having Oliver around is weird for you. It’s weird for me, too. I didn’t expect to ever see him again, and now, somehow, he’s part of the whole day. But I’m having a good time. It’s not better than spending the day naked in bed, but I’ll give it a close second.”
“Look at us being mature. Can you imagine telling our teenage selves that open communication is the solution to everything?”
“Nope, honestly, at thirty, I’m still shocked.” We walk the last block in comfortable silence, holding hands.
“Should we have brought something?” Colt whispers to me as I open the gate to the backyard. As usual, the whole place has become Party Central. It likely stays this way between events, but Matthias swears it gets cleaned up. I wouldn’t believe him except I’ve helped many times.
“Meh. I bring lots of stuff over. I brought a case of beer for the fridge a few weeks ago. Don’t worry about it.” I slide my hand down his lower back as he walks through the gate.
“You made it.” Aaron struts over and slaps a hand on my back. He’s always been the outgoing one in the group. “I’ve got stuff out on the table to eat. I know we just had lunch, but there’s always room for some snacks. Drinks are in the cooler, as usual.” It’s Matthias’s house, but Aaron acts like he owns it. Aaron is the group’s party planner, and Matthias likes to appease him by letting him use the space. The big home with a yard is wasted on Matthias, but at least he lets us all use it as often as we want.
“Thanks.” Matthias spots us and comes over. “The place looks great, by the way. Did you change something?” I ask him.
