He saw something in my face because he sighed and said, “Loosen the strap of your bag as far as it will go then get on.”
He motioned for me to hurry up when I didn’t immediately do it. Stifling an eyeroll, I did as he asked. Once I sat behind him, he grabbed the strap and lifted it over his head—while it was still around me. Then, he went one step further and tightened the strap so I pressed against his back. He grumbled the whole time, and that was the only silver lining in the whole situation.
“Take both arms out so it’s around your waist,” he said.
Understanding he meant to strap me to his back so I wouldn’t fall, I complied. But I didn’t like it.
As soon as he lifted his feet, the dreams pulled me under.
The Taupe Lady once again stood over a new mother. This woman didn’t put the babe to her breast. She set the quiet infant aside and hurried to bury the afterbirth not yet noticing the Taupe Lady. Lying on a coarse blanket shivering in the light warm breeze, I watched her with new eyes.
“The men tracking you have crossed the river,” the Taupe Lady said.
Fear clouded my mother’s eyes, and she spun to face the lady. “Thank you!” My mother scooped me into her arms.
“I did not tell you so you could leave,” the lady explained. “You need them. They are her only protection.”
“I am her protection,” my mother whispered forcefully as she hugged me to her chest to quiet me.
“You protect her from her father, but he will protect her from those who are much worse. For the love you feel for your child, return to him so her life may be spared.”
“Who are you?” my mother asked noticing for the first time that the lady’s feet didn’t quite touch the ground.
“I am a friend. Save your child and return.”
“If I return, he will kill me.”
The Taupe Lady’s eyes filled with sadness. “Yes, he will,” she agreed.
“Then, I cannot.” My mother ran with me.
* * * *
I woke lying limply against Luke’s back as he braked hard and turned into the parking lot of a small motel.
Instantly alert, I lifted my head. “What are you doing?”
“You keep twitching. You can’t ride sleeping. It’s not safe,” he said over his shoulder as he parked in front of the office.
Not safe? My whole life was not safe. Riding anywhere with one of them was probably not safe. Adding my narcoleptic tendency to sleep didn’t really decrease my life expectancy that much more.
He loosened the strap as I argued. “Sleeping strapped to you is better than sleeping here. We need to keep moving.”
“Believe me, I’m all for hurrying, but I’m not going to risk you falling off.” He lifted the strap over his head so we were no longer pressed against each other.
I scrambled to dismount. “I’m not tired anymore.” I saw in his eyes he didn’t buy it for a second. “I don’t want to stay here,” I said as I started to panic.
Taking a ride from him was different from locking myself in a room with him. I didn’t trust him—us—in a room. There was too much pull going on. My stomach went wild at the idea of a room with a bed and him in it. And my eyes dipped to his snug fitting shirt. Given his reaction when I got close to his neck, I didn’t see how this would end well for me.
“Too bad. Inside. Now,” he practically growled at me as he pointed to the door marked “Office.”
I met his eyes for another moment and then pivoted on my heel intent on walking if I needed to. I took one step toward the road. He stood in front of me before I took the second step. He didn’t look happy that I hadn’t immediately complied. We scowled at each other. A yawn ruined any hope I had of him taking me seriously. His expression changed to one of concern.
In my crazy, sleep deprived state, all I wanted to do was lean into him. If he happens to kiss me, I thought vaguely, I’ll just have to endure. Wait. What? No! No kissing. It led to other things, which led to a life of misery. I shook my head to clear it.
He sighed and tilted his head at me.
“You are so tired, luv. Please. Sleep a few hours,” he said.
