‘Is it?’ Lindy’s voice was muffled as she hurriedly swallowed a hunk of bread.
‘Yes, Lindy, it is.’ Tom’s tone was clipped – he was like a hectoring little toddler at the top of the table. ‘You in particular, Lindy, know exactly what I’m talking about. The events of the night of 16 July – a couple of weeks ago in case you’re too “hopped up on goofballs” to recall the timeline.’
‘I definitely am not, Tom. And I don’t know what you’re talking about.’ Lindy was withering but Ailbhe was freaked. What the hell was Tom saying? He surely couldn’t know about …?
‘I’m talking about drugs, Lindy, and from what I’ve seen you were the one supplying them.’
This statement rippled round the table.
‘What?’ squeaked Eddie, while Max said ‘MOM!’ in a vaguely admiring tone. A baffled ‘Lindy?’ was all Adam could muster. Ailbhe and Roe clearly had nothing to say – though Roe, obviously thinking on her feet, said, ‘Well … Lindy, I am shocked!’ and Ailbhe, despite the dire situation, had to suppress a bark of laughter. Oh God, there was nothing funny about this, though. How did Tom know?
‘Eddie, Adam, I’m not sure of your stances on recreational drug use, but I am vehemently opposed. With careful management microdosing can, I admit, be a good performance tool in a work situation, but magic mushrooms, in a child’s playroom and in the doses I saw these women ingesting them, is not good. Not good.’
‘Mushrooms?’ Eddie stared at Roe in abject horror. ‘You didn’t do this, Roe? A couple of weeks ago? What’s he talking about?’
Roe looked stricken and Ailbhe leapt up. It was one thing for Tom to confronther, but he had no right to mess with Eddie and Roe. ‘Please, Tom, this is between us and I can explain.’ She strode round the table to try and grab the iPad, but Eddie snatched it up just as Adam stood to block Lindy’s matching attempt on the other side of the table. Roe just sat in her seat looking ambushed.
‘Ailbhe,’ – Tom, she could see, was struggling to maintain his composure – ‘I am sure Adam and Eddie want to know exactly what their wives have been up to as well. There are, after all, children involved.’
He is not enjoying this.The realisation landed like a blow.He is upset, of course he is … He watched you get off your head with Tilly just downstairs. Ailbhe sat back down beside Roe and Lindy.But I was off my head by accident, for feck’s sake. She imagined they looked like the front row of a funeral.It didn’t seem that bad. We were just cutting loose. Ailbhe resisted the urge to defend herself, knowing that wouldn’t help anything. She pulled Tilly, who was starting to fuss, into her lap.Please let him forgive me. After everything, she knew this could be her ‘third strike and you’re out’ moment.Please don’t let this ruin us.
‘Hold on one sec, Tom.’ Adam lowered himself back into his chair, training his stern gaze on Lindy. ‘Max? Please give us a minute, sport. Grab some potato chips from the kitchen and go watch TV. I’ll be right in.’
Max stood and walked reluctantly towards the kitchen, clearly straining to hear if anything else was being said yet. They all watched him go.
‘Go on, Tom.’ Eddie rested his chin on his hand and looked impossibly weary.
‘I chose to tell you this all together because, as I said, all of our wives are involved but also because,’ Tom shifted uncomfortably, ‘I am aware that I don’t actually know my wife that well and I just wanted to make sure that she wouldn’t do anything—’
‘Tom! I would never!’ Ailbhe cried. ‘Please, I swear Tilly was totally safe. We were just doing this thing because my mam never had … and… and… I actually didn’t even mean to—’
‘Let’s just hear what Tom has to say, Ailbhe,’ Adam snapped. She felt like decking him. Of all the people at this tablehewas the one doing shitty things behind people’s backs.
‘It’s probably quicker if I just show rather than tell.’ Tom messed with his computer and his screen was replaced with a still of Tilly’s playroom. A small Tom was still visible at the bottom right of the screen and he continued to speak. ‘Before I left Monteray, I installed a prototype of some hardware we’re rolling out in the fall. It’s an add-on to the OptimEyes app, OptimEyesOnU. It’s a discreet multi-purpose camera. It’s going to be huge. In terms of home security and surveillance, it will blow Ring right out of the market. You never know, could be a good investment opportunity, Adam?’
‘Yeah, bro, I’ll keep it in mind.’
Lindy scowled across at this.
‘Anyway,’ Tom continued, ‘I put an OptimEyesOnU up in Tilly’s playroom because I figured it was a handy way to check functionality from another continent. I didn’t really think anyone would be up there, so I wasn’t trying to spy before anyone starts up about privacy breaches blah blah blah. I am sick of users being so paranoid.’
‘Tom, can you get on with this?’ Eddie was barely keeping his patience in check.
‘Sorry, sure. I had an assistant speed it up and edit it down. The original is at least four hours long, mostly garbled gibberish, but this will give you all the gist.’
The frame unfroze and Ailbhe could see them opening their boxes of mushrooms and that stupid cup of tea. She could see her and Roe having the whispered conversation about Seb, but luckily Lindy’s Snag List run-down was all that was audible. Then it fast-forwarded and they went from sitting in their chairs to varying states of highness in a matter of seconds. She was writhing through the ball pit in the foreground towards Eilers, who was standing swaying and clapping under a skylight. Roe was off in a corner laughing with her hands clapped over her eyes, and Lindy was scrolling on her phone looking bored.
‘Lindy, I cannot believe you were getting them wasted with a baby downstairs.’ Adam looked livid. ‘And for your … “business”?’ He pronounced the word with disdain but Lindy just shrugged impassively and Ailbhe, despite her own distress, was impressed with Lindy’s new zero-fucks stance. She should get an Oscar. Or a Nobel Prize for husband-fuckery.
More minutes sped by and Ailbhe watched herself and her mother lie under the skylight for what must’ve been hours. Then there was an interlude of some synchronised swimming in the ball pit, during which Roe leaned over the side and vomited into a wicker toy box full of stuffed animals and then carried right on rolling around with the others.Gross. Ailbhe barely remembered that. She could see some kind of vom run-off was seeping out from the bottom of the box – wicker was not ideal for containing fluids.
On the screen, Eilers vaulted energetically out of the balls and slipped straight over in the mess.
Christ, I must’ve blocked loads out. This does look a lot more degenerate than it felt in the moment.
‘I think that is everything we need to see.’ Tom ended the clip and his face filled the screen once more.
‘I’m sorry, Tom, Tilly was completely safe. I swear.’ Ailbhe held her daughter even closer. ‘Can we just talk about this in private, please? I’ve been making some really big changes since that night and—’
