Josh, Estes Park, March 2025
I don’t know how, but I’m still hungover when I pick up Ginger from the kennel a few days after Purim. After the party that night, I stayed with Michelle for a few days, spending most of my time sleeping and nursing my health with chicken soup. I’m not as young as I once was, and I feel it the most when I drink too much. Back in college, I could bounce back in a few hours, but now? My recovery time has stretched out to at least a full day and is a multi-step process. Currently, I still have a headache and feel like I’m about three liters of Lactated Ringer’s short of rehydration.
I let myself into the house while Ginger charges ahead. Before I get too far into the foyer, I step into a huge stack of mail on the floor and bend to scoop it up. Ginger, for her part, appears thrilled to be here and starts running zoomies around the first floor. I trudge my way into the living room and drop my duffel, collapsing onto the sofa and setting the mail down on the coffee table. The dog doesn’t even spare me a look before running out through the dog door, presumably to replace her scent in the yard.
I sort out junk from the real mail when something stands out among the pile. Oddly, there are official-looking letters from the Nebraska Board of Medicine and the Colorado Medical Board. My license renewal shouldn’t be up for another year at least, so I can’t imagine what it could be. I opened the envelope from Colorado first, and as I read it, the air in the room started to thin, like there wasn’t quite enough oxygen for me. My fingers are going numb as I absorb the fact that I’m holding an emergency suspension notice.This can’t be right. I check and confirm the letter addresses me, effective immediately. I read the words again, shock replacing my denial. The statement details an investigation into five separate reports. The summary claims that I’ve been practicing medicine while under the influence of alcohol and illicit drugs.What the fuck?
The eight-page document includes detailed affidavits from five patients. I don’t recall meeting any of them. One woman claims I wrote her a prescription for narcotics for recreational purposes while she and I were in a romantic relationship. I rush to open the document from Nebraska, which has the exact same allegations.
“What in the hell?!?”
My phone is ringing, and I hardly register that it may be a call for me—it sounds as if the ringing is a thousand miles away. I look down at the screen and see Henry’s name, one of my colleagues from the Wyoming office.
“Henry?” I answer and register that my voice sounds forced.
Once the adrenaline crash hits me, my spiral is going to be epic.
“Josh, do you have a minute?”
“It looks like I have many of them. This afternoon, I received letters from medical boards in Colorado and Nebraska. They informed me me that my medical license is suspended, pending an investigation. Did you know about this? Wait, is that why you’re calling?”
“Um. Yeah. It’s not only those two states. The Board of Medicine of Wyoming served us a notice of your suspension today.” He clears his throat. “I’ve never even seen you take a drink of alcohol, let alone get intoxicated at work. Do you have the names of the people who are accusing you in any of those letters?”
“I do, in the Colorado letter. None of them look familiar. It also reports that one of them says I offered her drugs while we were in a relationship. I’ve never even heard of her. What the hell is this, Henry?”
“Look, Josh, we know you didn’t do any of this. It’s going to be a mess while we sort this all out. Has anyone served you a notice of a civil lawsuit?”
“No. Wait, is that what’s next?”
“Not sure, but Steve worries about that very idea. Can you email me the names in the Colorado notice so we can see if any of these people are even patients of ours?”
“Yeah, good idea—but I can go ahead and read them to you if you want.”
Henry coughs and my belly seizes up as he continues. “Actually, if you can do it by email, that way we can keep an official paper trail.”
They are dropping me like a lit match in the plot twist I never saw coming.
“Um. Yeah, sure. I’ll do it as soon as we get off the phone.”Shit, shit, shit.Now, it feels like Henry has called to break up with me.
“Look, Josh, I called because we want you to understand—we know you. We know this is bullshit. That being said, Steve thinks you should get your own attorney in case there’s a suit filed against the practice.”
I swallow. Heisbreaking up with me. “Okay. I know some people.”
He’s calling to tell me they have my back when they actually do not.
“This is going to be over some pissed-off woman again, isn’t it?” He sounds more disappointed in me than judgmental. I know the answer, but Henry, my friend and colleague for years, doesn’t want me to answer. It’s all gone too far. He and I both know it.I went too far.He sounds so let down. I realize that, in all likelihood, I will be out of the practice for good, no matter what an investigation finds.
Now, there is a need to be careful with what I say. “I suppose so.”
“Well, like I said, we’re all on your side, Josh, but we’ve got to think about the clinic as a whole.” He clears his throat again. “If it were the first time, that would be one thing. But we’ve had to band together because of something in your personal life before…” He doesn’t finish his thought. He doesn’t need to.
“I better go find that attorney, Henry. You take care of yourself, and when I find out anything that can help the practice, I will let you know as soon as. Okay?”
“Yeah. Take care of yourself, Josh.”
“I’ll send an email with the names and a scan of the other notices in a few minutes. Do me a favor. Let me know if these are even real patients and in which states I saw them—for my attorney.”
“Sure. I’ll send you an email back as soon as we compile the records.”
