“Cara, you can’t see him.” I tried hiding the panic I was feeling, but I could tell in her big brown eyes that I wasn’t succeeding.
“Do you know him?” she asked me, nervously chewing on her lip.
I shook my head as I pulled up to Dane’s shop. “Just forget I said anything. Okay, brat?”
Her eyes still big and fearful, she nodded, and I hated that I had scared her. But she was much older than I was when I met the son of a bitch. Like me, she’d also lost her mom and even a bit of herself. The thought of him anywhere near her… It wasn’t going to happen.
She climbed out of the car, grabbed her backpack, and waited for me for a second. “I’m not coming in, brat. Tell your brother I’ll see him later.”
“Are you okay, Madsy?” she asked, and I wanted to kick my own ass for making her ask that.
I forced a smile as I nodded. “I’m good, darlin’. Go insideto your brother.”
I had another class that afternoon, but I didn’t go. I went home and began researching the man that made most of my teen years hell. It was something I should’ve done long before, but I wanted so desperately to forget.
I would never forget, but I had it put away until it was something I refused to think about, even if I couldn’t stop the dreams.
And seeing him brought out urges, strong urges that I’d been fighting for over three years. It also made the noise in my head get louder. So loud, it was hard to focus on the computer screen, but I managed somehow.I searched the web for several hours, making my way through every legal and illegal database I could until I finally found what I was looking for.
I leaned back in my seat, my eyes tired and blurry from the endless scrolling and reading, with a sick satisfaction. I had the bastard’s address. I didn’t know what I would do right then, but I knew where to start.
Pounding at my door broke the satisfied silence in my apartment. I looked at my watch, noting the late hour, wondering who it could be.
Even though I already knew the answer to that question. Especially when the door flew open and Ryder stormed in, looking frenzied and pissed. “Why the hell haven’t you answered your phone?” he barked, his face red with frustration.
“On silent,” I answered as I stood up from the computer.
“Dane called me. Said you freaked Cara out over her new school psychologist, then we couldn’t get you for hours. What happened?”
“Nothing,” I waved him off. “Just had a lot of work to do and lost track of time.”
“Bull fucking shit, mate. Try again. I know her new psychologist is O’Dell. Wanna try that again?”
My jaw clenchedfor a second before I forced the tension away, determined to be cool. “I overreacted.”
“Same thing you told me four years ago. Care to enlighten me why you keep overreacting to the same man?”
Smile still firmly in place, I shook my head. I forced myself to remain calm and breathe normally. I didn’t want him to see the anger that was building. Not at him. At myself for lying to him. But I couldn’t tell him the truth. “It’s nothing,” I repeated. “What are you doing out so late? Or here anyway?”
“When my best friend doesn’t answer his phone for nearly twelve hours, I find it necessary to make sure he’s okay,” he snapped again.
Of course, I felt guilty. Ryder had been through a lot in the last couple of years. And I knew why he was worried about me. He’d watched me like a hawk—or best he could—since the night I found out Jewel was my mom. It wasn’t fair of me to make him worry more.
“Come on,” I jerked my head towards the couch. “I’ll get us something to drink, and we can watch a movie or something until you calm down.”
“Maddox, why don’t you tell me what’s going on? You’re always hiding stuff. You know I’ll love you no matter what, right?”
I walked over to him, gripping him by his neck, and pressed my forehead to his. “I know, Ry.It’s something I just can’t tell anyone, but you know everything that matters. You know me,” I promised as I pressed my lips to his. What had started as a way to relieve stress all those years ago progressed over the years into something else. We weren’t in love, but we did love each other. And we found our own sort of comfort in each other.
Needless to say, we didn’t watch movies that night. For a little while, O’Dell didn’t matter.
But when the sun came up. I had a plan.
Over the next few days, I watched the apartment complex where O’Dell lived. It wasn’t far from my apartment, and that in itself didn’t sit well with me, but it did make watching him a lot easier. Iusedthe excuse of coffee and a different place to study, as I sat for hours inside the café across the street from him. I made mental notes of his routine. Noticed every time he left and came home. If he was alone or had someone with him. I followed him, always maintaining a safe distance, appearing to be part of the crowd as I stalked his every move. I even hacked into his emails and social media pages to monitor his plans for the weekend. It was something that I should’ve spent weeks on, but I didn’t have weeks. I had to do this before Cara saw him thefollowing week because I’d fucking die before I let him hurt her.
Ryder and Dane were both suspicious. They questioned every denial to hang out when I told them I had to study. Of course, they both knew I didn’t study, but it was the best excuse I could come up with. When I called in sick to Lucky’s, the bar where I worked, Ryder appeared at my apartment again. An argument almost broke out when I turned down a gig that Saturday.
Dane instantly questioned if I was drinking or getting high. He’d been playing big brother since I met him, but he actually started feeling like my brother in that time. Ryder was beside himself, not understanding what was going on with me. I hated lying to them, but it had to be done because Saturday was the day.
