“Does she? I have a feeling you’re quite lacking in all the ways that satisfy the little pixie.”
“Don’t talk about her like that.” His face turns red.
“She’s mine. I’ll talk about her anyway I please.” I let my smile stretch wide across my face, but it’s not a friendly smile.
“She hasn’t been yours since you tossed her aside.” The arrogance of this guy is really starting to piss me off. Or maybe I’m the arrogant one and he’s just being protective. Tough shit. Because I’m territorial.
“I’m right here,” Heaven yells over both of us. “Stop talking about me like I’m some toy. Brett, go home. I need to talk to Ryder.”
“Heaven, I don’t think you should be with him alone.”
“He’s afraid I might bite. I guess he doesn’t know how much my bite turns you on, does he?”
“Stop it,” she shoves me. Then huffs when I don’t budge. “You’re being an asshole.”
“Did you forget, love? Iaman asshole.” I give her a smirk that makes her squirm. It’s a dance that I recognize well. When I cock a knowing brow at her, her face flames. “Fine. First, I want to know what’s this about losing your parents’ house?”
Her red face becomes impossibly redder. Her eyes water, but she holds back the tears. “That’s my problem.”
“It’s mine if it affects Tyler.”
“It doesn’t,” she presses her lips together, crossing her arms over her chest. Her chin tips up a bit in determination.
She looks so much likemypixie. Even her little tells are the same. But I know she’s not the same girl she once was. And I’m not the same guy.
“Fine,” I tell her, leaving it alone. For now. “I came to bring you this.” I hand her the court order that allows me temporary visitation with Tyler until we can get before a judge.
She looks at it with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. “You didn’t have to do this,” she whispers. “I would’ve let you see him.”
“You’ve dictated the last eight and a half years, Heaven. You’ve lied and kept him from me. I’m not letting you control this.”
“You haven’t even tried to talk to me about it,” she whispers. Her shoulders drop and her eyes land on the ground.
“Did you really think I would? I can barely look at you without getting angry. Eight years, Heaven. Do you know what that feels like? To learn you’ve missed out on eight years of your child’s life because someone else decided? Of course, you don’t. But I can make sure you miss out on the next eight.”
Her head snaps up. Her eyes grow wide as saucers. “Ryder, please don’t do this. We can work this out.”
I shake my head. “I won’t do it, but not because of you. Because of him.” I jerk my head toward the door Tyler just went through. “But this won’t be on your terms.”
“Ryder, please. We can do this together. Don’t take me to court. I can’t afford a lawyer.”
“Haven’t you sucked enough dick yet?” I hate myself the minute the words come out, but it’s all I’ve pictured since last night. I am a fucking hypocritical asshole and a goddamn bastard, but it’s out there now.
The hurt on her face slashes right through me, but I have to push it away. I won’t get sucked in by her again. I won’t give her a chance to hurt me again. If I start giving in now, it’s only a matter of time.
“I know what you’re doing,” she tells me. “I know you’re just lashing out.”
I give a humorless chuckle. “You don’t know a thing about me anymore, pixie. The guy you know is dead. He died when you left. You shattered my heart after I asked you not to. Then you took the pieces with you so I couldn’t put it back together. This,” I gesture down myself, “is what’s left, and it’s dark, angry, and full of fury.”
“Ryder, I’m sorry. I was a scared, stupid kid. If I had known, I wouldn’t have left.”
I shake my head. I can’t do this. Not now. Maybe not ever. But definitely not in her front yard. “I’ll be back tomorrow, Heaven.” I tell her as I walk away.
I climb in the vehicle, put my glasses back on, and drive away without looking back.
Heaven
Off My Mind
