“Finn wasn’t enough for you,” he says, his voice like an itch down the nape of my neck. “It couldn’t have been him.”
I shake my head. “This is crazy.”
“The fact that he let me take his place should tell you everything.”
“You should have told me first.”
“Maybe.”
“You should have told my brother at least.” I grip my glass tightly. “You can’t just keep breaking into my life.”
His head tilts to the side ever so slightly. My cheeks burn hot and red with flushed embarrassment and terror. What if I’m wrong? What if he’s not actually my ghost?
But no, I’m positive. I can see it in his eyes. The slight widening. The tightening of his jaw. He knows what I’m talking about.
“That’s the problem, Bianca. I can’t stop.” He finally takes a step closer. One single movement, and halts. “I’ve tried. Lord knows.But I’m a weak man, and I couldn’t let Finn marry you when he wasn’t enough.”
“You keep saying that. I don’t even know what you mean. Finn seemed nice?—”
“Nice will get you killed,” he snarls, shockingly angry. I flinch back and he visibly calms himself. “Finn is a good man, but you’re getting thrown into a charnel house. You need a monster if you’re going to survive it.”
“You’re the monster then? That’s supposed to convince me?” I throw back my drink and swallow it hard. “Here’s news for you. I don’t want to marry you.”
“I don’t want to marry you either.”
“Then why the hell did you do it?”
“Because you’re going to need me.” He comes closer again. I should move away. I should run. All my instincts are screaming at me to throw my glass at his face and get the hell out of here. But my body feels like it’s being tugged in the opposite direction, right toward the source of all my nightmares.
“I think you’re overestimating yourself.”
A slow shake of his head. “No, feather, I’m not. Men will try to hurt you. Finn won’t be enough. I told your brother this, and he understood. That’s why I’m here.”
“If you changed Adriano’s mind, he would’ve told me.” I hold up a hand to stop him from advancing closer. “You need me to agree, don’t you?” He tenses again and I can’t help the laugh that bubbles out. “Oh my god. Adriano said it’s my choice, didn’t he? That’sexactlylike him.”
“Be smart. With me by your side, you’ll be untouchable. The whole of New York will be terrified to get anywhere near you. Finn might be good, but I’m pure evil. That’s what you need.”
“You’re wrong,” I whisper, glaring at him now. A little confidence fills my chest. “That’s what you don’t get about me. All this mafia stuff?” I gesture around us. “Iloatheit. I’ve spent most of my life volunteering at a women’s shelter in a pathetic attempt at trying to balance out all the shitty things my family does. I only agreed to this in the first place because Adriano said I’d have the chance to set up my own foundation. Your evil isn’t appealing, Cormac. If anything, it’s completely repulsive.”
He flinches as if I struck him. I stand my ground, buzzing with manic energy. Terrified I’m crossing the line with a dangerous man, but absolutely convinced he’d never put a hand on me in anger.
This is my ghost.
Even after everything, I still refuse to think my ghost would ever willingly hurt me.
“I’ll give you the foundation,” he says, voice a hoarse whisper. “I’ll give you money, contacts, assurances. Whatever you want, it’ll be yours. All your dreams. All your hopes. I’ll die to make them happen, feather.”
“Why do you keep calling me that?”
He ignores the question and comes forward. “You hate what I am. I don’t blame you. I’m broken. I’m twisted. When you look at me, all you can see is hate and darkness. But use me, Bianca. Be the light I can’t ever reach. Do something good with this—” He curls his hands into fists, staring at his fingers.
And I can finally read what they say.
Lighton the right hand.Darkon the left, with a small black cross on the thumb.
Light and Dark.
The sick part of all this is I believe him. He says he’ll do anything for me. He says he’ll give me what I want. And I believe he really will.
