“My thanks, Father.”
This week, I allowed my lust for a woman I’m supposed to be using to get the better of me. I need to gain control of my ability to think and eradicate this problem hanging over our heads. Our future and safety depend on it.
Myfuture and safety depend on it, as does everything I’ve worked so hard for.
I can’t allow anything to clash with that, not even Adriana.
No matter what I feel for her.
27
Natalia
The women moved into the sitting room, where the maids brought out little cakes for us to eat.
I was grateful to get away from Mikhail’s brother. I don’t know where he is, but I didn’t like the way he was looking at me. Or should I say leering. There’s a big difference between simply looking at someone and gawking at someone’s body.
He reminded me of Raul’s guards. The way they used to leer at me and undress me with their eyes made me sick.
I couldn’t exactly be disrespectful toward Ivan, but I don’t think I’m wrong in what I saw.
I also didn’t miss the tension between him and Mikhail. It was very obvious.
I can tell Sophia is trying to get us all talking, but the three women with us don’t seem to like me very much.
They’ve been talking about their vacation plans for the Easter holidays, and I’ve been sitting here sipping on a glass of fruit punch.
Mikhail hasn’t been gone that long, but it’s been long enough.
The youngest woman, who might be a little older than me, keeps cutting me dirty looks and glancing at her sister, who snickers as if she’s privy to some secret joke.
I forgot their names as soon as I was told them because of the horrid way they were both appraising me.
Their mother seems slightly nicer, but I think she’s probably being nice because of Sophia.
Another look comes my way. I was pretending I didn’t notice her looking at me, but I’m done doing that, so I look right back at her, glaring, which surprises her so much she looks away quickly.
God, I need air.
I can’t deal with shit like this now.
If we’re leaving soon, I don’t see why I have to sit in here with them treating me like I’m a fucking leper.
I push to my feet, and Sophia glances up at me.
“Are you okay, dear?” she asks. “Forgive us for getting carried away with our traveling plans. It’s been a while.”
“I just need some air. Is it okay to go out on the terrace?” I reply.
“Of course, that’s no problem.”
“Thanks.”
They all watch me as I walk out, and I’m sure as soon as the door closes, I’ll be the talk amongst them.
I don’t care. I can’t care. Their lives are different from mine, and so are their life experiences. When you’ve been through what I have, women being bitches are the least of your worries.
Besides, I’m only receiving the treatment I expected to get coming here.
