“So you’re having a fight?”
“No, it’s over,” I assure her. “I did something pretty unforgivable.”
“You cheated on him,” Sasha says, nodding with understanding.
“No, it’s not that…”
And that’s when I realize something:
I didn’t do anything wrong.
Okay, technically, I did. I stole an exam. But I did it for honorable reasons. The worst thing I’ve done is that I wasn’t honest with Matt about why I did what I did. He deserves to know the truth before he decides to dump me. Honestly, I owe it to him.
“Sasha,” I say. “I have to run out for a few minutes. Can you watch my stuff?”
Sasha looks confused but nods in agreement. I leave behind all my belongings, and I run out of the library. I hurry up the stairs, past the anatomy labs, over to Matt’s office. It’s dumb because of course, he’ll never be here. But I have to try.
Just as I get to Matt’s office, the door opens, and the prongs of his cane peek out. I race over then pause, doubled over, trying to catch my breath.
“Matt,” I gasp.
He looks up at me. There’s no affection in his blue eyes.
“What is it, Rachel? I’ve been stuck here all night rewriting the exam.”
Well, at least he seems more angry than hurt right now.
“Can I talk to you for a minute?” I ask.
“There’s nothing to say,” he mutters.
“Please.”
Finally, he nods, although his expression is still wary. He backs up to give me room to enter. He gestures toward the seat, and I sit down while he plops down in his own chair. He crosses his arms and glares across the desk at me.
I had been working on a brave little speech as I ran over here. Something about how I gave in to the blackmailer to save his career and only did it because I care about him so much, and if he couldn’t understand that, then maybe weweren’tmeant to be together. But he keeps looking at me with that hurt and angry expression, and the second I open my mouth to speak, everything I planned to say suddenly flies out of my head.
And then I’m crying. Huge, ugly tears are gushing down my cheeks. My shoulders shake with wracking sobs. I don’t think I’ve ever cried so hard in my whole life. I wipe my eyes, trying to keep up with the rapid flow of tears, but I can’t.
“Rachel,” I hear him saying, “Rachel, please stop crying…”
“I… I can’t!” I sob. “I miss you.” I sniffle and hiccup. “I know you don’t believe me, but I only stole that exam because someone was going to tell on us.”
He frowns. “What are you talking about?”
“I got a note.” I wish I’d brought the note. Oh well. “It said that if I didn’t put the exam in Locker 282, everyone would find out about the two of us. I couldn’t let that happen.”
“Yeah, sure…”
“It’s true!”
He’s quiet for a minute. The only sounds in the room are the whir of the heater and my persistent sobs. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to stop. They’ll put me in theGuinness Book of World Recordsfor crying.
Finally, he sighs loudly. “I don’t know what to believe anymore…”
I look up at him and wipe my eyes. “It’s true,” I insist again, trying to keep my voice from shaking. “I swear it’s true. I swear on my life.”
Finally, Matt stands up and hobbles around the desk. He touches my shoulder gently, and I look up at him. I feel really unattractive with my swollen eyes and runny nose.
