Everyone scrambled to get in place.
“You got this,” said Chastity. “You look totally droolworthy. Tanner won’t be able to take his eyes off of you all night. And then when he sees you with someone else…” She mimed her head exploding.
“Wait, Tanner is gonna be watching?!”
“Of course. I assume anyone who’s anyone in the Society will be here tonight. Who knows…he might even be up for an award.” She gave me a hug and ran to her side of the stage.
Fantastic.Now I was a billion times more nervous than I had been.
I took a deep breath.Here we go.
I walked to my place behind a semi-circular wall just as a stagehand delivered a tray of…giant onyx dildos, complete withthick veins. They were made out of some shiny black metal and each was the size of a Febreze can. No. Bigger. I’d thought Dr. Lyons was big, but these dwarfed him. Hell, these even dwarfed Angel and Diablo.
“Impressive, eh?” said the guy who’d delivered them. “Apparently they were actually cast from one of our members, but I’d have to see it to believe it.” He carefully polished each with a cloth and then sped off to his next assignment.
I tried to run through my script again, but one thought kept rolling around in my head.Was Tanner the model for these awards?
Because if he was, then it might explain some of his behavior. Maybe he was terrified of tearing me in two. After all, I was only 5’2. I hated to quote Chastity, but she was right. That really would be a lot of meat for such a little girl.
“Ladies and gentleman,” boomed the announcer as the stage lit up. “Put your hands together for the imperator of Club Onyx NYC… Pink Ocelot!”
He made his way out onto the stage to thunderous applause.
Wow.Ocelot had said it was 400 people. But it sounded like thousands. There was currently a wall blocking off my part of the stage though, so I couldn’t tell for sure.
“Thank you, thank you. Thank you all.”
The crowd eventually settled down.
“Wow. What a year,” said Ocelot. “I know you’re all probably expecting a big dance number or some sort of Broadway reenactment, but this year, I’m just going to keep it simple. And who knows…maybe I have a sexy little surprise waiting for you all at the end. So with absolutely no ado, let’s get right to the awards.”
The circular wall in front of me rotated to reveal the crowd.Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.It was SO. MANY. PEOPLE. They were all seated around tables like some sort of fancy wedding reception. And all looking at me.
Actually, they were probably looking at the monster dildo trophies behind me. But it still felt like they were staring at me.
I tried to pick out Tanner in the audience, but the lights were blinding. I could only see silhouettes.
“As always,” said Ocelot, “we’ll begin with the award for Best Ass. The nominees are…” He read a list of 5 girls while their pictures appeared behind him. The only one I recognized was Frankie. “And the winner is…” Ocelot tore into an envelope. “Frankie!”
The crowd cheered while the spotlight searched for her in the audience. Eventually it found her making her way towards the front.
Ah! This is my moment!I ran through the script in my head. Stand and smile. Clap politely. Grab award. Give award to winner and kiss their cheek. Go back to standing and smiling.Shit! I’m not clapping politely.I was already failing. I startedclapping way too loud and then dialed it back to an appropriate level.
Then I reached for one of the awards. I tried to wrangle it with one hand right at the base, but it was kind of slippery and so damned heavy that I couldn’t get any purchase. My hand just slid right up. I slid it back down to try again…
Someone in the crowd chuckled.
Oh, shit. I was basically jerking off a giant dildo in front of the entire crowd. I awkwardly looked around and then picked it up with both hands.
“You’re doing great,” whispered Frankie as she took the award from me.
Was I?Because I had definitely forgotten to kiss her cheek. Or more accurately - I’d actively chosen not to. I wasn’t a 50-year-old European man or Joe’s dad at a Christmas Eve party, so cheek kisses weren’t really something I was comfortable with. And actually, Joe’s dad was more a fan of mouth kisses. I wasn’t into those with creepy old men either.
Frankie got to the podium and looked at the award. “Wow. Wow!”
The crowd cheered.
“Thank you all so much for this honor. I prepared a few words…” She reached into her bra and pulled out a slip of paper. Just as she was about to start reading it slipped out of her hands. “Damn. One sec…” She turned and bent over to get it in like…the most sexual way possible. And then a beat dropped and she started twerking in her evening gown.
