“Who the hell…” I tried to say between laughs. But I couldn’t get it out. The relief of finally having my sex tape safely away from Joe and the ridiculousness of Tanner, his lamp, and that odd little butler was too much. I was in tears from laughing so hard.
Between laughs I was finally able to get the whole question out. “Who the hell was that guy? And how did he get here so quickly with those cookies?”
“Don’t even pretend you haven’t seen him before, stalker. That’s Nigel. My houseboy. Was that not clear from his uniform?”
I stared at him in disbelief. Tanner was officially nuts. But I kind of loved it. I might have finally met the one person in the world stranger than myself. “Oh, of course. Silly me.”
“You’ll have to meet him properly some other day. I would have had him stay, but he’s been quite busy recently. Although I’m pretty sure he’s just trying to keep his mind off the departure of our recent houseguest.”
Recent houseguest? As in…a female?I was trying to figure out how to ask more questions without sounding jealous when Tanner’s phone rang.
He checked his text and shook his head. “Damn. Our caterer just said their head chef gets seasick, so they’re pulling out of the launch party. I better head over there to see if I can change their mind.”
“Okay, let me fix my makeup real quick and then…”
“You don’t have to come,” said Tanner. “Today’s your day off. I got this.”
“I really don’t mind.”
“Nope,” said Tanner. “You didn’t even want to go with this caterer, but I pushed for them. This is my mess, I’ll clean it up. We’ll have to reschedule our dinner for another night though.” He grabbed a cookie off the platter and headed out the door. But he stopped just before closing it. “Oh, and Ash?”
“Yeah?”
“I felt bad that you wasted your wishes on silly stuff, so I granted you a fourth wish. I think you’ll find it’s way cooler than a platter of cookies.”
A fourth wish? How very un-genie-like of him. He’d been so smooth with his joke up until then. But I wasn’t complaining. I loved surprises. “What is it?” I asked.
“I don’t want to spoil the surprise. But you’re going to want to take a closer look at that bookshelf.”
Stalker Problems - Chapter 45 - The Bookshelf
Thursday – May 25, 2023
What did Tanner do to my bookshelf?That was the question that I couldn’t get out of my mind. That was the question that had forced me to call for an emergency girls’ night. Because as far as I could tell, there wasnothingnew or different around my bookshelf.
My books were all in the same place.
The photos of me and Chastity and Madison from college hadn’t been disturbed.
And my fake flowers were just as I had arranged them.
If I hadn’t been so anal about dusting three times a week then there might have been a trail to show what had been disturbed. But alas, I was an anal freak. In like, a clean way. Not the anal sex way.Gross.
The more I stared at my shelf, the more I began to think that Tanner had made the comment about my bookshelf just to mess with me.
I was just about to pull every book off the shelf when Chastity, Madison, and Liz barged in carrying a box of wine.
“Girls’ night!” they all yelled in unison.
“Wow,” I said. “That was quick.”
Chastity opened the box of wine. “You said it was an emergency. Want a drink?”
“Of course. But seriously…how did you guys get here so fast? I literally texted you like four minutes ago.” How was everyone getting to my apartment so quickly tonight? They’d come almost as fast as Nigel and the cookies. God, was I high right now? I’d accidentally eaten a pot brownie in college once. I’d been tripping balls for days afterwards, despite Chastity’s insistence that it had worn off. I didn’t remember eating anything weird today though. Actually, I hadn’t eaten much all day… I was probably hallucinating or something.
“We were at Panera waiting for your call,” said Madison as she plopped down on the couch next to me.
“What? Why? Did you know that Joe was gonna threaten to release my sex tape again?”
